Cold Is The Tea Drank By This Customer

, , , , , | Right | August 25, 2019

(I’m working at a tea shop that steeps loose-leaf tea. Hot teas are served in white paper cups and cold teas are served in clear plastic cups.)

Customer: “May I have a hot oolong tea with no sweetener?”

Me: “Sure.”

(I prepare the tea and hand it to the customer. The customer leaves and comes back a couple of minutes later.)

Customer: “Hi, sorry, could you please give me a different cup for this?”

Me: “Oh, sure. Did something happen to the cup?”

Customer: “It’s just weird; it looks weird.”

Me: “Umm, okay? How can I fix that for you?”

Customer: “Can you switch it to a plastic cup?”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “Also, add ice to it.”

Me: “Umm… So you want a cold tea?”

Customer: “Yes.”

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Taboo Tattoo

, , , , , , , | Related | August 13, 2019

(My older sister, who is in her early 30s, has a steady job, and owns her own home, has recently gotten a tattoo on her wrist. It is a two-inch long portrait of her beloved pet rabbit done in a style reminiscent of the classic Winnie the Pooh illustrations. I knew beforehand she was planning it, but we both kept quiet about telling our more conservative mother about it. After it is done and my mom learns about it, she calls me over the phone, very distressed about it:)

Mom: “I just can’t believe my daughter would be the one to do this. What are people going to think of her now?”

Me: “Mom, did you even see what the tattoo was a picture of?”

Mom: “No, as soon as she told me, I refused to look at it and left.” *sniffs, as she’s been crying* “What is it?”

Me: “It’s a very tasteful upside-down pentagram.”

Mom: “…”

Me: “Mom? MOM?! It was a joke! She didn’t get a pentagram!”

Mom: *heavy exhalation* “You little b******! I might need to go to the hospital after that!”

(She has since calmed down on the issue, though she probably still wants to hide it from my grandparents. My sister told me that my joke actually made things better as it has reminded that her tattoo isn’t the worst thing ever.)

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Somewhere Out There, A Social Justice Warrior Is Ready To Be Offended On His Behalf

, , , , , , | Friendly | July 2, 2019

My family, all Caucasian, are packing up as we get ready to return home from a vacation. My parents realize that there won’t be room in the car for a watermelon my mom bought but didn’t get around to eating.

Rather than throw it away, she decides to offer it to the hotel staff and see if they want it. As she jauntily walks up to the front counter, the man behind leaves and is replaced by a black man.

My mom slowly comes to stop as she pauses and considers what she’s about to do. She stands still for a solid minute, staring at the man, as she weighs her options. She finally just decides to ignore her concerns and asks the man if he is interested in a free watermelon. He happily takes it without comment.

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Unfiltered Story #151084

, , , | Unfiltered | May 19, 2019

(I am a female-to-male transgender individual. I am pre-transition and due to a combination of health issues and certain unwanted assets being too large to safely bind, I am unable to pass as male, though I do dress in a more masculine fashion.

Tonight is the release of the newest and last game in a very popular bat-themed superhero video game series. I have a copy for PS4 pre-ordered and have just arrived to join the queue of gamers waiting for the game to be released. In the past, the people closest to the door of the store are in the back of the line, so I go to stand there. There’s a group of guys of varying ages that are obviously together, and they begin staring at me with rather snotty looks on their faces. One guy in particular seems to be their leader.)

Him:  “Hey uh, I don’t mean to be rude. But uh, you’re in the wrong line.” (His tone was rude and confrontational despite his choice of words.)

Me: “Is this the line for Arkham Knight?”

Friends #1 & #2: *scoffs* Yeah!

Me: “Then I’m not in the wrong line.”

(They all exchange annoyed expressions and looks of disbelief, as though I had a lot of nerve standing in that line.)

Leader: “You getting it for your boyfriend or something?”

Me: “My husband isn’t a big fan of the Arkham games.”

(They look at me incredulously.)

Leader: “You play the Arkham games?”

Me: “Yep. I love Batman.”

(They keep exchanging looks, giving me looks, and muttering sexist things.)

Leader: “Yeah, well, this is the front of the line. Get in the back of the line.”

Me: *Shrug* “Alright.”

(I go to ask a store employee who is checking people’s receipts where the back of the line is, because I most certainly don’t want to cut in front of anyone else.)

Me: “Excuse me, where’s the back of the line? Those gentlemen over there *I point to them* insisted that was the front of the line.”

Female Employee: “*Follows my finger and rolls her eyes and sighs in disgust* It doesn’t matter where the “front” of the line is. Everyone will have to line up outside soon.”

Me: “*Smile apologetically to her* Alright. Thank you.”

(Soon the line moves outside and the group of guys are confronting people that are at the front of the newly formed line.)

Leader: “Make room, we were here first!”

Guy: “I’ve been standing here for a few minutes.”

Leader: “We were at the front of the line!”

Female Employee: “Either get behind them, go to the back of the line, or come get your game tomorrow!”

Leader: “We were at the front of the line! *Angrily stomps behind the people at the front of the line*”

(When it comes time to go inside and get my game, those guys are walking out as I’m walking inside, and they once again shoot me a plethora of dirty looks.

I really love gaming, but I absolutely hate the sexism within the gaming community.)

The Sugar-Crystal Skull

, , , , , , , | Learning | April 3, 2019

(I am in a culinary arts class that takes place in a small kitchen area. Students from a creative writing class recently used the space for a project that involved making calaveras, tiny human skulls made entirely out of granulated sugar and butter. They left behind a small mess for us to clean, including most of a malformed skull.)

Classmate: *pointing at mangled skull* “What should we do with this?”

Teacher: “Eh, that one’s a reject. You can just toss it.”

Classmate: “Can I have it?”

Teacher: “Sure.”

(That guy proceeded to eat the entire skull over the course of our class. Almost a cup of pure sugar and no flavorings.)

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