Draw From This Experience

, , , , , | Learning | September 20, 2017

I was always a pretty smart cookie when it came to schoolwork, taken honors classes through my grade school years, and even had a couple advanced classes through high school. In my sophomore English class, I had a teacher that both loved and hated how I worked. As I was a proficient and independent reader, and often helped other students with their own work, one would assume there would be no problem with me. Unfortunately, the teacher didn’t agree with my extracurricular reading and drawing when I was done with the assigned work in class.

She gave us a packet of grammar work pages that you’d find in a third grade classroom, as evidenced in plain, bold print on the bottom. She spent about twenty-five minutes reading out the instructions, and I took that time to zip through the packet, seeing as it was basic English. By the time she allowed everyone else to get to work uninterrupted, I was done and decided to draw for the remainder of the class. She took this chance to come up to me, with what I could only assume was the most disapproving look she could muster.

“I’m going to call your father and tell him what you do in class all day!”

Without missing a beat, continuing my sketch with my right hand, I held up the work packet with my left, leafing through the eight pages of children’s work, showing all the complete pages, not a single blank left. With the packet back on my desk, she just walked away and didn’t say another thing to me the entire class.

She never called home, either.

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Unfiltered Story #93130

, , | Unfiltered | September 7, 2017

*In this case, I’m the crazy customer (due to exhaustion, I’d like to say before anyone says anything), but I’ve been helping a friend move and I’ve been doing a lot of heavy lifting because I’m the youngest and the only other person who can help me is my uncle. Because he isn’t good with stairs because of his age and my friend lives on the second floor, I’m doing most of the heavy lifting and as a result am incredibly tired and can’t think straight. It’s also during a heat wave with temps hitting almost 110 and that also adds to how I’m acting despite drinking enough water. Keep note that we’ve been doing this for three days now and in those three days, I’ve worked about 14 hours, which normally would be fine except I’ve been resting a lot and now I’m suddenly needing to do a lot of moving. The first account of my tiredness is in the evening after we’ve finished for the day and everything else is the next day when we’re taking a break from moving running errands*

Example 1:
*We (me, my grandma, and my uncle) are having dinner after moving at a popular 24-hour diner that we go to all the time. We are paying the bill and it’s obvious we’re tired and the waitress is being nice, asking about our meal, our day, etc., and we happen to bring up that we’ve been moving for the past three days and are nowhere close to being finished*
Waitress: Well, I hope you all sleep well and can finish moving soon!
Grandma: Thank you. *She pays the bill and we start to leave*
Waitress: Hope to see you again soon!
Me: *Thinking automatically she said “Have a great day!”* You, too! *I pause as my mind finally processes* Wait, uh, that’s not what I meant…
Waitress: You’re tired dear. Get some rest.

Example 2:
*My grandma and I are running errands and I need to get a flu shot. I go to a local pharmacy and am telling my information to get me into the system*
Nurse (I don’t know their actual job title because I know the pharmacist is different, bear with me): Name and date of birth, please.
*I give my name and then say blankly* Why do you need my date of birth?
Nurse: …To find you in the system.
Me: *After a moment’s pause* Oh, right! Sorry. *I give that info to him*
Example 3:
*We’re grocery shopping and I notice a 3 for $3 deal on a product that we like. I don’t know why my mind processed it this way but I read it as each time is $3 only if you get three. I tell my grandma that and she looks confused for a moment before saying* No, it means each thing is a dollar. (My name), how much sleep did you get last night?
Me: Eight hours…I think. I don’t remember.
Grandma: We’re going to finish here, get something to eat to take home, and then you’re going to bed.
Me: Yea, that’s probably best…

To everyone that dealt with my confusion throughout both days, I’m so sorry and I promise I’m not as clueless or dumb as I put on! I’m normally much better! I was just exhausted from all the sudden activity for so long over the past few days!

Brushing Aside The Truth

, , , , , | Related | June 14, 2017

(I’m not very good with children, and quite the science nerd. While visiting my sister, I have this interaction with my nephew, who is five years old.)

Nephew: “[My Name]?”

Me: “Yes?”

Nephew: “Why don’t penguins have teeth?”

(I, not wanting to make anything up, decide to give him a very quick overview of evolution.)

Me: “Well, they don’t need them. You see their ancestors came from really little birds who couldn’t—”

(Out of nowhere.)

Sister: “Their teeth fell out when they stopped brushing them!”

(My nephew gets a horrified expression and RUNS to the bathroom, and immediately starts trying to brush his teeth.)

Me: *incredulously* “That was mean.”

Sister: “It’s called being a mom!”

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Booking Forward To The Future

, , , , , | Right | May 31, 2017

(I’m working at the customer service desk, and a customer comes to ask a question.)

Customer: “Where can I find a book? I can’t find one anywhere.”

Me: “Um, well, there are books everywhere. You see them everywhere you look.”

(The customer looks all around.)

Customer: “Those aren’t books. Books are those pads you can play games on.”

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Why Dance Rhymes With Romance

, , , , | Romantic | September 12, 2012

(It’s my birthday, and my girlfriend has cooked me an amazing dinner at home. Note: she has lost 90% of her left leg due to bone cancer when she was 17. The other thing to note is that my car’s radio/cassette player has been stolen, so I use an old boom box. Because the boom box had started melting in the car due to the Phoenix heat, I’ve gotten into the habit of bringing it inside with me when I leave my car. Thus, my girlfriend isn’t surprised when I bring the boom box in.)

My Girlfriend: “So? How was it?”

Me: “‘How was it?’ Are you kidding? You’re a fantastic cook!”

My Girlfriend: *smiling* “Okay…gift time!”

Me: “You mean you planned more than steak and potatoes for your ‘steak and potatoes’ man?”

My Girlfriend: “Yup.”

(She hands me an envelope, which I promptly open up.)

Me: “Sting tickets? You got me Sting tickets?! Oh my God, I love you!”

My Girlfriend: “I thought you’d like it!”

Me: “I love it! And you! And now… your present.”

My Girlfriend: “My present? It’s your birthday.”

Me: “Trust me on this one.”

(I pick her up and set her down on her one leg in the middle of her living room. She didn’t usually wear her prosthetic at home because it is uncomfortable.)

My Girlfriend: “What are you doing?”

Me: “Shhh. I said to trust me.”

(I move to the boom box and hit play for the CD. Our song, Celine Dion’s “Because You Loved Me,” starts playing. I then start to slow dance with my girlfriend.)

My Girlfriend: *tearing up* “I haven’t danced since I lost my leg.”

Me: *softly* “I know…”

(We slow-danced until the song was over, with her shedding tears of joy the whole way through the song. And while our relationship didn’t last, it was a truly amazing date for that dance alone.)

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