Doggie Day Scare

, , , | Right | May 3, 2021

Our chain offers pet grooming, shopping, training, and doggy daycare, though not all offers are available at all stores. My store does not have a doggy daycare, which is stated on our location’s website. I answer the phone.

Caller: “I need my dog in daycare.”

Me: “We don’t have a doggy daycare but—”

Caller: “Yes, you do!”

Me: “Uh, unfortunately not. Our store isn’t big enough. I can refer you to some nearby locations if—”

Caller: “Just connect me to the daycare manager.”

Me: “There is no daycare here, sir.”

Caller: “You’re so f****** stupid. What’s your name?”

Me: “[My Name].”

Caller: “Good.” *Hangs up*

Half an hour later, a man with a full-grown Cane Corso marches in the door and yells my name. My manager walks over with me.

Caller: “Which one of you is [My Name]?”

Me: “I am.”

Caller: “Get me your manager.”

Manager: “I’m the manager. Can I help you, sir?”

Caller: “I called about doggy daycare and she said my dog couldn’t come.”

Manager: “Sir, I apologize for the confusion but we don’t have a daycare here. We—”

Caller: “Yes, you do! It’s online!”

Me: “Some stores have them, but we do not.”

Caller: “Bulls***! It’s because he’s a ‘vicious breed,’ isn’t it?”

Manager: “Not at all, sir. We don’t have a daycare to place your dog.”

Caller: *Pulls out his phone* “Look, it’s right here on your corporate website! You don’t allow aggressive breeds in doggy daycare. That’s racist!”

Me: “Sir, we don’t have a daycare. At all. Regardless of what kind of dog you have. For what it’s worth, I think your dog is sweet. There are other daycares in the area. I have a list of contacts if you’d like to call them.”

Caller: “You’re racist! Admit it!”

Manager: *Firmly* “Sir. We have no daycare.”

Caller: “I’ll find someone else to watch him, then!”

He leaves.

Manager: “So…”

Me: “Yeah…”

Manager: “He thought we wouldn’t take his dog because of his breed?”

Me: “Yup.”

Manager: “He proved that he was aware of the rule?”

Me: “Mmhmm.”

Manager: “And… then got mad at us when we had no way to break the rule for him.”

Me: “Some people just want to be mad.”

We later found out that he called corporate, got nowhere, and then wrote one-star reviews on our Facebook and Yelp pages.

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Of Mice And Maybe Men

, , , , | Right | April 30, 2021

I’m cleaning the mouse cages. I’m working on the top one, so I’m standing on a stool stretching my short self to reach the bottom. A group of guys approaches me as I’m doing that and begins to ask questions about the animals. I’m female.

Guy #1: “Hey, how do you guys keep them from making babies?”

Me: “We keep the males and females separate.”

Guy #2: “Yeah, but how do you know they’re separate?” 

He’s looking as if he is thinking hard and raising an eyebrow at me, reeking of attitude. His buddies are in the background trying unsuccessfully to not smile like preteen boys whispering the word “penis” in class. I stop my work, get down from my stool, and look the main one in the eyes.

Me: “Sir, they have balls. Fairly noticeable ones. You’re familiar with balls, right? Males have them… normally.”

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Fishing Through The Lost And Found

, , , , , | Right | April 26, 2021

Customer: “Have you got a lost and found? I left something here last week.”

Employee: “Yes. What was it?”

Customer: “A bag with my things in. I think I put it down by the door when I was putting my coat on.”

Employee: “Was it something you bought here?”

Customer: “Yes, it was my goldfish and fish food and some dog chews.”

Employee: “Oh, that was yours! Yes, we have your bag. I’ll go and get it for you, and then you can choose some new fish.”

Customer: “What happened to the ones I bought?”

Employee: “We put them back into the tank. It’s fine. We made a note of what was in there; you can just pick out new ones.”

Customer: “I already picked the ones I wanted. Why didn’t you just keep them for me?”

I had to leave so didn’t hear the end of the conversation, but I sure feel sorry for that poor employee having to explain why they couldn’t keep a bag of live fish for a week.

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She’s Not Playing When It Comes To The Sand

, , , , | Right | April 7, 2021

I work at a pet store. I’ve only been working there for about a month when this happens. A lady, probably in her fifties or sixties walks in one day and comes straight up to me.

Customer: “Hi, I was wondering if you sold play sand for birds?”

Me: “I’m not sure if we do, but we can go to the bird section and check if you’d like?”

We walk to the bird section, which is right at the back of the store, and the whole way there she keeps asking:

Customer: “It’s play sand, for birds! Play sand. [Popular Hardware Store] sells it. It’s called play sand. It’s for birds. It’s called play sand.”

We quickly establish that we do not sell play sand for birds, only sand substrate for reptiles, crabs, and fish, so I apologise to the lady and we begin to walk back up to the front.

Customer: “I thought you guys would sell play sand! [Popular Hardware Store] sells it; they call it play sand. I just wanted some play sand, for my bird! It’s called play sand. They sell it at [Popular Hardware Store].”

She bought a few other things and kept repeating “play sand!” the whole time. By the end of it, I was ready to pull my ears off if I had to hear the words “play sand” one more time, and I was just thinking to myself, “Why did she not just get it at [Popular Hardware Store]?”

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That’ll Stick With You For A While

, , , , | Right | March 18, 2021

I work at a pet store. We sell bully sticks, which are actually made of — I’m sorry — bull penises. A woman holds one up.

Woman: “Why are these so expensive?”

Me: *Joking* “Well, there’s only one per bull, so…”

Woman: “Well, what is it made of?”

Me: *Trying not to laugh* “His, y’know… stick.”

She couldn’t have dropped it faster if it had been on fire. I love this place.

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