Pregnant With Rage

, , , , | Right | January 20, 2020

(I sold a guinea pig to these people earlier in the week, and the mom calls the store and begins ranting.)

Me: “Hello, can I help you?”

Mom: “Is your name [My Name]?”

Me: “Yes.”

Mom: “You sold a guinea pig to us last week, and this morning it had babies!”

Me: “Oh, wow, okay.”

Mom: “It’s my daughter’s birthday today and now we have to deal with these baby guinea pigs! You should have told us it was pregnant!”

Me: “I didn’t know it was pregnant.”

Mom: “Don’t you separate the males and females?!”

Me: “Yes, but we can’t control how they’re kept before we get them.”

Mom: “Well, I would think if you work in a pet store you should be able to tell if a guinea pig is pregnant!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not a vet; I had no way of knowing that.”

Mom: “You’ve ruined my daughter’s birthday! I hope you’re happy!”

(She hung up.)

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Unfiltered Story #182277

, , | Unfiltered | January 14, 2020

(We used to carry reptiles in our shop, but we stopped about a year or two ago for financial reasons. We now only stock a limited amount of supplies as well as feeders, and we also do boarding.)
Customer: You don’t have reptiles anymore?
Me: No, we stopped selling reptiles over a year ago. We only sell some supplies now.
Customer: Oh, it’s been forever since I’ve been here. [Old manager] used to work here.
(The old manager has not worked here while I’ve been here, which is at least five years, and is in fact dead.)
Me: Oh, yes, that was a while ago. She actually died.
Customer: Oh, yeah. So where is all your reptile stuff?
Me: In the aisle where it was before.
(Customer goes to aisle and shortly shouts over to me.)
Customer: You used to have a big rock!
(I approach the aisle.)
Me: This is all that we have in the way of reptile supplies, we don’t carry a lot.
Customer: Yeah, but you had a big rock–
Me: As I said, this is all we have.
Customer: Are you the only one here, or is there someone who can actually help me?
Me: What is it you need?
Customer: You used to have a big rock with a hole on the side, it was well-made.
Me: How long ago was this here? We sometimes can’t actually get certain products anymore.
Customer: Yeah, it was like a year ago.
(I highly doubt this since he told me just moments ago he hadn’t been in the store in forever, and when he had the old now deceased manager was here.)
Me: As I said, this is all we have, there is nothing out back, we aren’t ordering any new products. I’m sorry, but that’s all we’ve got.
(He proceeded to mope and tried to get me to sell him tanks and equipment that we use for boarding. Funny how forever can turn into one year.)

Watch Out For The Crazy Gecko Tote Lady

, , , | Right | January 11, 2020

(As a pet care specialist at a nationwide pet store chain, my duties include not only caring for animals on the sales floor, but also rotating “deep cleans” of each pet care sub-department during the week. On this day, I am in the midst of reptile habitat maintenance — glass aquarium removed from the end cap, working with a cart of cleaning supplies and freshly washed decor and dishes, and fresh substrate — and am wearing a brightly-colored uniform shirt and a radio, with a name tag. An older fellow walks in, fetches a cart, and pauses his walk down the main aisle when he reaches where I am standing with a gecko in a tote and my gloved hands smoothing coconut soil into its home.)

Customer: “Excuse me. Do you work here?”

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What’s In Store Is That Our Store Doesn’t Have Policies For Their Store

, , , | Working | January 10, 2020

(I do volunteer work for a cat rescue that has adoption centers in pet stores. I am at one store every week and have become familiar with the employees. At closing time, I close up the adoption center and use the public restroom. While in the stall, I notice that some polka-dot fabric has been stuffed into the dispenser for the paper toilet seat covers, and I pull it out. It turns out to be a dress, most likely from the clothing store next door, complete with price and security tags. I finish up in the restroom, and take the dress up front.)

Me: “Hey, I found a stolen dress in the restroom, probably from [Clothing Store].”

Employee #1: “Wait, really?”

([Employee #2] exits the office nearby and joins the conversation.)

Employee #2: “Huh. Well, we don’t really have a policy regarding customers finding stolen merch from other stores in our store, so I guess you got yourself a new dress.”

(I give her a look. I worked retail for years, and I am really not okay with playing finders-keepers with stolen merchandise.)

Employee #2: “I guess if you don’t want it, you could always take it back to [Clothing Store].”

Me: “Sure. But then they could accuse me of stealing it in the first place.”

Employee #1: “Oh!”

(From the looks on both of their faces, this hadn’t occurred to either of them. And now [Employee #2] is realizing how helpful it is that she’s wearing a [Pet Store] uniform as it sounds less suspicious for her to say that a customer in [Pet Store] found their stolen merchandise in the bathroom.)

Employee #2: “Or, you know, I could take it back.”

Me: “Yeah.”

(Somebody’s gonna be really sad when they go back into that bathroom tomorrow to find their stolen merch gone.)

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Colorful Pronouns

, , , , , | Right | December 30, 2019

(I am a transgender man and wear a pin with my pronouns on it at work as a way to encourage their use without necessarily having to out myself. Today, I am ringing a woman out who repeatedly refers to me as “she.” After the third time, I gently correct her.)

Me: “Actually, ma’am, it’s ‘he.’”

Customer: “Huh?”

Me: *taps pin* “It’s ‘he,’ not ‘she.’”

Customer: “Oh! I thought that said, ‘she/him.’”

Me: *blinks and glances down at the pin, which very clearly reads “he/him”* “Er, no. It doesn’t.”

Customer: “Well! You can’t blame me for being confused! It’s pink!

(The pin is indeed pink.)

Me: “Well, I have a yellow one at home. I’ll have to wear that next time. Have a wonderful day, ma’am.”

Customer: *leaving* “It’s pink!

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