Rat Chance At Redemption

, , , , , , , | Working | May 16, 2018

(I work in a big-box pet store in the pet care department, meaning I do customer service for people interested in buying the fish, reptiles, birds, and small mammals we sell, and I also take care of those animals. I love all animals, and it’s well-known among my coworkers and managers. I particularly enjoy taking care of the rats. Unfortunately, our suppliers keep and ship them in dreadful conditions, and some animals don’t do too well, obviously. Even more unfortunately, one of our new managers has taken it upon herself to micromanage the animal care, but has no experience in this area. She therefore makes mistakes like not turning away shipments of animals that have skin conditions or other serious health issues. Then, she has the nerve to blame employees for not curing them. She particularly hates me for some reason, even though we both adore rats. One new shipment has a rat that is particularly aggressive. Even after acclimating it, it snarls and tries to bite any human who approaches it. I try to steer clear of it because [Manager] insists that it’s just temperamental and won’t send it back or isolate it. One morning, I open the cage to give the rats food, and the evil rat RUSHES at the door, LEAPS out, and bites my finger hard. I wince as I scoop the rat back up with my non-bleeding hand and put it back in the cage, then go to get cleaned up. My finger is completely sliced open. Of course, the first aid kit is in the manager’s office.)

Manager: *immediately chewing me out* “What were you doing to the rat that it did that to you?”

Me: “I just opened the cage, and it rushed toward me before I could react.”

Manager: “Nonsense. Rats are sweet creatures. You did something wrong. That’s it. I don’t want you near the rats anymore. You’re forbidden from interacting with them.”

(I’m offended, and still bleeding, but gently remind her that I am the only person working in the department that morning and still need to give the rats fresh water and potentially show one to a customer.)

Manager: “They’ll be fine without fresh water until [Coworker] comes in. If a customer wants to buy a rat, come get me.”

(Sighing, I went back to work while nursing my finger. An hour or so later, a family came in, and guess what they wanted to buy? I alerted the manager and accompanied them to the rat cages. [Manager] was going on and on about how gentle and sweet rats are and what great pets they are for children. She opened the cage to retrieve an adorable gray one for the customer to pet; of course, it was the evil rat, who did not take kindly to the family’s cooing and promptly chomped down on [Manager]’s finger. She gasped, turned to look at me, and turned red with fury. The family decided a rat was not a good pet for them. [Manager] was eventually transferred to another store, although she never bothered me again for the remainder of her time at our store.)

Why Don’t You Bunny Hop Out Of Here?

, , , | Right | May 16, 2018

(At the pet store I work at, we cannot sell bunnies close to Easter for obvious reasons. The same applies to snakes, spiders, and black cats close to Halloween. A few incidents of people bringing them back was too much for the owner. Some customers don’t or refuse to understand this, however. Example #1:)

Man: Hi, can you show me where the bunnies are? I’d like to buy some.”

Coworker: “Sorry, sir, but we’re not allowed to sell rabbits so close to Easter.”

Man:What?! This is ridiculous! I can’t have an Easter party without a d*** rabbit!”

Coworker: “Again, sorry but rules are rules. We had people buying pets in impulse and bringing them back shortly after.”

Man: “So? Who wants animals after they served their purpose?”

(Example #2:)

Customer: “Excuse me, can you show me where the kittens are?”

Me: “Sure, but I hope you weren’t planning on a black cat, since we’re not allowed to sell those during Halloween season.”

Customer: “What?! Without a black cat my decor and costume will be ruined! What about snakes?”

Me: “It’s a no for them and spiders.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll go to the animal shelter.”

Me: “Pretty sure they have a similar policy.”

Adopting A Devilish Attitude

, , , , | Related | April 28, 2018

(My wife, my dad, and I are looking at the cats up for adoption at a pet supply store, but we absolutely don’t want to adopt, as we all have too many cats already. My dad has a sense of humor that can be very confusing to those who don’t know him well. An employee walks up to us.)

Employee: “Are you guys looking to adopt a friend today?”

Dad: “Get behind me, Satan.”

(The employee was stunned, and my wife and I were equal parts horrified and amused. My dad acted as if this was a perfectly cordial thing to say. We checked out and left the store. Outside, we explained to him that the employee did not get his joke, so he bought a blank greeting card from the shop next door and wrote, “Sorry I called you Satan,” on the front. I didn’t get to see the employee’s face when my dad gave him the card, but somehow I doubt it made him any less confused.)

When Saying, “Thank You For Your Service,” Results In Crickets

, , , , | Right | April 23, 2018

(My boyfriend is in the Army National Guard and has been away in training for three months. While he’s been gone I’ve been taking care of his bearded dragon. Today I’m wearing a jacket that says Army, and has his name on it. Today is also Veterans Day.)

Me: “Hello, can I have 57 crickets, please?”

Employee: “57? That’s a precise number there!”

Me: “Yes, sir! I only have a little bit of money to spare, and I did the math, and that’s how many I can get!”

Employee: “I understand! Nice jacket! Are you in the Army?”

Me: “No, sir. My boyfriend is. He’s in training now; it’s his dragon I’m buying the crickets for.”

Employee: “That’s pretty cool! My girl wouldn’t even look after my fish when I went on vacation!”

(We laugh, then he proceeds to bag up my crickets. While I knew he couldn’t get an exact amount, I notice there’s well over the amount I asked for in the bag.)

Employee: “All righty, ma’am! That’ll be $3.87.”

Me: “Are you sure? There’s way more than what I asked for; it should be almost $10!”

Employee: *smiles* “I know, ma’am. Tell your boyfriend thank you for his service. You have a blessed day!”

Me: “Can I hug you?”

(I left the store almost in tears from this man’s generosity. When I got to talk to my boyfriend later that evening, he couldn’t believe it! Now that employee gives me a discount every time I go in!)

Give No Credit To The Cashiers

, , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(It has always been company policy that without a receipt the store can only refund the customer with store credit. The management in our store is particularly unwavering about this, since we have had quite a few shoplifters try to return stolen high-price items for cash. Customers will occasionally get upset with this policy and cause a scene. I am passing by the register where a new hire is dealing with one such customer. It is only her second week, and she is clearly overwhelmed.)

Me: “What seems to be the problem?”

Coworker: “She’s trying to return this item without a receipt. I’ve told her that we can only give her store credit for it.”

Customer: *angrily* “So, what? You’re not going to give me my money back?”

Me: “Without a receipt, I’m afraid we can only give it back to you as store credit. It’s just corporate policy.”

Customer: “So, then, I can’t return this and get my money back? That’s ridiculous!”

Me: *seeing that this isn’t going anywhere* “Let me double-check with my manager.”

(I step into the [empty] office, wait five seconds, and then come back out.)

Me: “Unfortunately, they said the same thing: we can only accept the return for store credit or as part of an exchange.”

Customer: *calmly* “All right. I guess I’ll just take the store credit.”

(The rest of the transaction goes smoothly and the customer leaves.)

Me: *to my coworker* “They always assume the cashiers are lying to them.”

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