Don’t Have A Cow, Man, Part 4

, , , | Right | June 1, 2020

When someone asks why I hesitate to answer the phone at work, this is the story I tell.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]; how can I help you?”

Caller: “I need a cow.”

Me: “A… cow?”

Caller: *Scoffs* “Yeah, like moo. Horns, udders. A cow.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t sell cattle.”

Caller: “No. A cow.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t sell ‘a cow.’”

Caller: “Why not?”

Me: “We don’t house livestock. You could try an auction house; [Farming Company in the next town] might be able to direct you.”

Caller: “Well, you sell animals, right?”

Me: “We sell small animals. Rabbits, reptiles, rodents… not cattle.”

Caller: “That’s dumb.”

Me: “I’m sorry we don’t have what you’re looking for.”

Caller: “Why not?”

Me: *Fed up* “We don’t have a livestock license. We sell small pets, not large farm animals.”

Caller: “Well, how am I supposed to get a cow?”

Me: “As I said, there’s a farm supply store, or you could try an auction. I know there are farm shows going on all summer. Maybe ask a vet?”

Caller: “F*** you and your stupid store!” *Hangs up*

Don’t Have A Cow, Man, Part 3
Don’t Have A Cow, Man, Part 2
Don’t Have A Cow, Man

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An Unrewarding Revelation

, , | Right | May 28, 2020

A customer comes in angrily, holding up our store’s rewards card.

Customer: “Hey, did you know that this doesn’t work at any other store?” 

Me: *Long pause* “Yup.”

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Unfiltered Story #194949

, , , | Unfiltered | May 26, 2020

(I’m working a stat holiday that falls on a Monday. On our door is a sign with our holiday hours on it, and we are close to closing. I let any customer that comes in know that we are closing in a few minutes.)
Me: *as customer walks in* Hello! Just letting you know we close in ten minutes.
Customer: But your hours say you close at nine!
Me: Yes, but it’s a holiday so our hours are different, we close at six today.
Customer: Oh.
She quickly finished her shopping, and we had no other problems with people coming late.

Unfiltered Story #193981

, , , | Unfiltered | May 13, 2020

A customer comes up to get help looking for a black Light to help find pet urine stains in carpets. On our way to the product she is holding a 6 pack if flea control.
Customer: How many doses are in this?
Me: Uh, 6. Ma’am here is the only thing we have for stain detection, it is an LED type light and has the stain remover as well.
Customer: (while walking towards the item about 5 steps away) Is that really $40
Me:Nope just 25
Cusomer: Oh guess it is on the tag. So how does this work?
Me: You shine the light, kinda like a flash light in the area you think the odor is coming from.
Customer: How long does the bulb last?
Me: Depends on how long you are using it for, and how long the batteries last.
Customer: Does it come with batteries?
Me:(looking all over the package) I am not seeing if it does or not, sorry.
Customer: Oh it’s LED that means it doesn’t need batteries.
Me: Uhhhmm. Yeah, it does. They need electricity to work, the batteries supply that.
Customer: Whatever, it won’t need them, I will take this then. Thanks!
That ended the interaction and left me wondering how she does anything. Her(what I am assuming daughter) just stood there with a blank stare and offered nothing to the conversation.

Unfiltered Story #193913

, , | Unfiltered | May 10, 2020

I work in a grooming salon inside a popular pet supplies store. It’s about two or three minutes before the store closes, but I’ve just closed the salon and am checking out with a bag of cat food before I head home. At the register next to me, I overheard a conversation.

Customer: I recently bought a fish here but it died and I would like to buy this fish now for the same price as I got the last one.

Cashier: (looks at the receipt she shows him) I’m sorry ma’am, but the fish you had is not the same as this fish. This species of fish is a little more expensive.

Customer: Look, this is the third time I’ve wasted my time and gas coming down here. I want this fish for a dollar.

Cashier: Ma’am, this is not the same species of fish. I can’t sell it to you at the same price as another species.

Customer: I want to speak to your manager.

I had to leave right after that, and I have no idea what the manager did. I was just taken aback that a woman walked in right before closing and demanded a fish for a dollar for absolutely no reason.