My mother and her best friend decide to go shopping at a local strip mall and force me to go along with them.

Our first stop is a somewhat more upscale shoe store. Given that I’m really not a fan of clothes shopping and the minor health issues I have involving my feet, I quickly find a place to sit in one of the less busy parts of the store when a middle-aged man walks up to me.

Man: “Hey, do you work here?”

It takes me a second to process his question, all the employees I’ve seen walking about are wearing nametags and business casual attire. Meanwhile, I’m wearing a band tee, ripped jeans, and a mask with vampire fangs on it while just sitting on a bench playing on my phone.

Me: “Uh, no. No, I don’t.”

Man: “Oh, well, you should!“

I just sat there, wondering what he meant by that, as he wandered away.

Related:
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 40
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 39
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 38
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 37
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 36

I’m driving back from the first day of my first ever job. As I’m sixteen, I’m still a very new driver. Between both of my parents having their own cars, their own work schedules, and the fact that we have a very narrow driveway, we have to shuffle cars around a lot in the evening so we aren’t getting up earlier in the morning. 

I call my dad via the hands-free option on my car when I’m only a few minutes out so he isn’t scrambling to come out to move his car for me.

Dad: “Oh, you’re calling me for this? Why don’t you just text me like your mother?”

Me: “…”

Dad: “Never mind, I’ll be ready when you get here.” *Click*

In my mother’s defense, she has a smartwatch she uses speech-to-text on, but still!

Every few weeks, [Friend #1], [Friend #2], [Friend #3], and I plan little outings to catch up. This week is my turn to plan. [Friend 1#] tells me that [Friend #4] wants to go. I agree, even though I barely know him, because it brings the cost down and he seems like a nice guy. Before booking and paying, I send out a mass text.

Me: “Hi, all! The total for our adventure is $1,000. With all five of us, it’s $200 each. Is that okay with everyone or should we look for something smaller?”

The first three friends agree that it’s okay. [Friend #4] doesn’t respond. I wait for a full day before contacting him directly.

Me: “Are you good for $200 for [event]?”

Friend #4: “K.”

Me: “Okay, I’m gonna book it. You can pay me there.”

Friend #4: “I said OK.”

The day of the event comes and we all gather at my house. My first three friends have cash in hand, but [Friend #4] shows up empty-handed. I pull him aside. 

Me: *Quietly* “Hey, do you have your money?”

Friend #4: “No.”

Me: “I told you it’s $200 to go out today.”

Friend #4: “I don’t have that kind of money.”

Me: *Frustrated* “So why did you tell me you were good? I asked—”

Friend #4: “You said I could go.”

Me: “If you pay.”

Friend #4: “You didn’t say that. You invited me out and now you expect me to pay?”

Me: *Sigh* “If we cover you, can you pay us back?”

Friend #4: “You already paid for everything, right? It’s not a lot more if you—”

Me: “No. You pay or you don’t go.”

Friend #4: “I drove all the way here and you aren’t going to let me go?”

I shrug.

Friend #4: “F*** you!”

I’m one of those people who laugh when they get mad, like now.

Me: “Get the f*** out of here.”

Friend #4: “You know what? I heard you were a c***, but I gave you the benefit. Now I see he was right. You’re f****** white-a** trash. F*** you!”

I tell our friends what happened. [Friend #1] shakes his head. 

Friend #1: “I’m sorry, [My Name]. He has money; he just doesn’t like to spend it. He pulled the same s*** at dinner the other night.”

Me: “Well… thanks for being so flexible. But if any of you ask if [Friend #4] can come with us again, my answer is no.”

My friends all pitched in to help cover [Friend #4]’s absence. He tried to wedge his way into another event a few weeks later, but I shut him down without hesitation.

My dad is, well, let’s just say he’s a “denier” about the current health situation, and he has spent quite a while trying to convince me not to get vaccinated. Like parent, like child, of course, and we’re both too stubborn to listen to each other. He’s currently giving me the cold shoulder because he finally found out I got the jab behind his back. It’s also important to note here that I am studying Public Health.

Mom: “You know, I think he’s more upset about the fact that you refused to even listen to him.”

Me: *Voice dripping with sarcasm* “Ah, yes, because I’m going to trust the word of a man who works in a refinery and who hasn’t taken a health or science class in — what, thirty-five years — over the word of my professors who have degrees and years of experience in the field.”

My mom just shrugged at that. Maybe now that I am vaccinated, he’ll finally leave me alone.

I’ve managed to damage the heat shield on my car, and, given that I’m still a teen and have pretty abysmal knowledge about cars, my dad accompanies me to his stepbrother’s shop to get it fixed. When we get there, there’s already a middle-aged woman in the shop who’s having a pretty heated conversation with the employee behind the counter. 

Honestly, I don’t pay too much attention to what she’s saying because she’s not really making a scene despite being upset, but I do hear her make a few comments about how “payments aren’t adding up” before calling her father to come inside. At that point, my step-uncle appears and brings us outside so we don’t see the rest of their conversation.

The next day, my dad approaches me.

Dad: “You remember that woman at [Step-Uncle’s Shop]? You know what [Step-Uncle] told me about her?”

Me: “Yeah, what happened?”

Dad: “It turns out her father wrecked his car and asked her to help pay for the repairs. He told her he needed about $2,000 for it, but then she somehow got a hold of the final bill that said it was only about $1,500. So, she came back to the shop all upset thinking they’d scammed her poor elderly father. Well, together they managed to figure out that the old leech tried to scam his own daughter! He just lied to her about how much he needed! Apparently, she left the shop considerably angrier than when she arrived.”