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A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 8

, , , , | Right | November 6, 2025

Customer: “Why is the bread section so empty?”

Me: “Apologies, sir, the bread has been delayed a few days due to the hurricane down south. That’s where the trucks come from.”

Customer: “Well, that’s no excuse.”

Me: “That’s your opinion, sir, but that is the reason.”

Customer: “Can’t they just drive around?”

Me: “Around… the hurricane?”

Customer: “Yeah! I saw it on the news; it’s just a round thing. It’s not a line separating the north from the south. They can drive around it.”

Me: “That’s not how it works, sir.”

Customer: “Well, they need to think of something because your customers are going to go without sandwiches, and that would be a disaster!”

I scan his face for the faintest sign of irony or trolling, but there is none. This guy genuinely believes what he is saying.

Me: “That’s… is also your opinion, sir. You can try again in a couple of days.”

Customer: *Muttering as he ‘storms’ down the aisle.* “Stupid hurricanes blowing away all the bread!”

Related:
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 7
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 6
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 5
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 4
A Storm Of Entitlement, Part 3

Some Customers Literally Ask For The Moon, Part 2

, , , , , , , | Right | November 3, 2025

It’s late June in London, so our sunsets are way past 9 PM. A guest storms up to the desk about 8 PM.

Guest: “What time does the sun f****** set in this d*** country!”

Me: “Sir, please don’t swear. The sun sets tonight at 9:21 PM.”

Guest: “Jesus! Where are we, the North Pole?!”

Me: “Where are you from, sir?”

Guest: “New York.”

Me: “Yes, that is a fair bit further south than London.”

Guest: “It’s just, I have a dinner reservation tomorrow before the theatre, and I wanna propose to my girlfriend.”

Me: “Congratulations, sir!”

Guest: “You don’t understand! It’s her dream to get a proposal under the moonlight, so I booked some crazy expensive outdoor place for dinner before the show! But the sun… never… sets!”

Me: “You can’t do the proposal after the show?”

Guest: “No, the restaurant already has the ring! They’re gonna put it in champagne for me!”

Me: “Sir, you could always have dinner after the show?”

Guest: “That restaurant is booked solid for months! You have no idea how much I planned for this!”

Not enough, if you didn’t even look up sunset times, if moonlight is so important to you.

Me: “Sir, I’m afraid there’s not much I can do about the sun. If you like, I can set up a private cocktail table at the rooftop bar for you tomorrow night. If you can get your ring back from the restaurant, I could arrange for the bar to present it in a glass of champagne here instead.”

Guest: “You’d do that for me?!”

Me: “In the name of true love, of course!”

Guest: “Oh my god, that’s amazing! Thank you! My girlfriend is in the spa now, so I’m gonna run to the restaurant now!”

He dashes out and is back in the lobby within the hour. I organise all I need to, to orchestrate his plan.

The next night, everything went off without a hitch, so I was told.

Except for the fact that this is England, so it was cloudy all night and the moon was obscured, but she said yes anyway, so I guess it worked out all right in the end?

Related:
Some Customers Literally Ask For The Moon

Category 5 Entitlement

, , , , | Right | October 29, 2025

I used to work as a bank teller in a rich town in Long Island, New York.

Client: “Why are you closing so early today?!”

Me: “Because hurricane Sandy is making landfall later, and it’s going to be unsafe for the branch employees to drive home.”

Client: “Aren’t you local!? Can’t you just walk?!”

Me: “No one working here can afford to live in the town.”

Client: “You can’t afford to live in the town because you have a lazy work ethic!”

Me: “Ma’am, are you planning on coming back later during the hurricane?”

Client: “Of course not, but you need to honor banking hours! It’s lazy to just rush home because of a bit of bad weather! Now hurry up and process my deposits! I have to get home before the wind gets too crazy!”

She did not see the hypocrisy of her words.

Related:
If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 5
If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 4
If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 3
If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 2
If Only They Could Hear Themselves

We Snow Who You Are

, , , , , , | Right | October 20, 2025

This happened somewhere between 2015 and 2020. I worked for a somewhat small municipality. Our “town hall” is spread out over mostly two buildings right next door to one another. One of the departments in the other building processed U.S. Passport applications as one of its services.

On this day, we had just experienced a snowstorm, dropping around six to twelve inches of snow overnight. Our official snow policy was if school is delayed or canceled, employees may also use that same amount of time (up to two hours) without penalty to ensure they get to work safely.

Some employees like to use the whole allotted time (for various reasons: clearing driveways, young kids in school, needing to arrange care, living in smaller towns with poorly maintained roads, etc.), while others still try to get in on time while being safe on the roads, knowing they don’t have to rush. When this does happen, notices are sent out to all the local TV and radio stations of the delay.

Town Hall opens at 8:00 am. I don’t remember if school had a two-hour delay or was canceled, but about half the employees weren’t in right at 8:00 am. I, myself, arrived at around 8:15 am, needing extra time for clearing off my car and the area around it as well as driving 10-15 mph under the speed limit due to the icy and not fully-plowed roads.

As I walked into the building, I saw a resident who looked familiar, angrily complaining to my manager about something before storming off into the parking lot. Curious, I asked what had happened in the fifteen minutes the building had been open.

The resident had an upcoming international trip planned and needed to renew the passports for his whole family, so he showed up next door to that department at 8:00 am only to find the doors were locked because nobody was in at the time.

He stomped over to our building to see if anyone was in, since we were supposed to open at 8:00 am, so he was furious as to why nobody was in next door.

He found my manager, screamed at her for a bit while she stood there with a shocked expression, but quietly allowed him to rant uninterrupted. She explained that due to the storm, some employees were taking a little extra time to get into the offices safely, but they should all be in soon. She also reminded him that passport applications don’t begin until 9:00 am (this is posted on the website and on the door with the hours).

Unsatisfied, the resident demanded, “Don’t you know who I am?!” This is where it all clicked as to why he looked familiar; he was the owner of a chain of local car dealerships, famous for his breed-specific dogs in their commercials. Knowing this, my manager (typically not one to get flustered at angry customers) cheerfully answered, “Yes! You’re [Full Name]!”

Thrown off a bit, he then stormed off into the parking lot, which was when I passed him.

The passport department employees did show up within the hour and were able to process his family’s applications quickly. Surprisingly, he came back to our building to apologize for his behavior earlier, which my manager dismissed as unnecessary, but she thanked him. I had several interactions with him after that incident, and he was never anything but polite and personable those other times, so I chalked it up to travel and weather-related stress.

I told my mother what he had said to my manager (“Don’t you know who I am?!”). And now, years later, whenever his commercials come on and we’re in the same room, she always blurts out, “I know who he is!”

Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 26

, , , , , | Right | October 4, 2025

It’s a bitterly cold Chicago winter outside, where the air hurts your face. A customer approaches, holding a tray of bottles of apple juice.

Customer: “Excuse me. If I leave these in my car overnight, will they freeze?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. It’s about -5° outside during the day, colder at night. The juice will definitely freeze if you leave it in the car.”

Customer: “Okay… but what if I wrap them in a blanket?”

Me: “Uh… blankets don’t really keep things warm.”

Customer: “My blanket keeps me warm all the time!”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, but that’s you generating the heat. The blanket just helps keep it close.”

Customer: “So… the blanket won’t help?”

Me: “Not unless apple juice suddenly learns how to produce body heat.”

Customer: “Oh, wait, it’s apple cinnamon juice! Those stay hot, right?”

Related:
Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 25
Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 24
Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 23
Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 22
Thermodynamics, You Take It From Here, Part 21