A Hail Of Outrageous Requests

, , , , , , | Right | November 15, 2017

(I work at a theme park. It’s a particularly busy day and I’m working at a ride that includes live animals, such as giraffes and rhinos. It has just started thundering and hailing, and we have to cease operation, as have all the other outdoor rides in the park. Most people are leaving the queue to get somewhere dry. I am standing in the hail, dripping wet, only wearing my uniform, which consists of shorts and a polo shirt. I am already on the edge of tears when a customer fights her way to the front of the line and starts yelling.)

Customer: “WHAT IS THIS MADNESS? WHY ARE YOU REFUSING TO RUN THE RIDE?”

Me: “I am very sorry, madam, but under these weather conditions it is not possible to operate the ride safely.”

Customer: “It is just a stupid truck going around; that can’t be dangerous. You’re just making excuses!”

Me: “I’m very sorry, but this experience includes live animals such as rhinos and giraffes, and we can’t possibly account for their behaviour during this storm.”

Customer: “I AM GOING TO GO ON A DIFFERENT RIDE, THEN! LET ME OUT OF HERE!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but all of our other rides are going to be shut down due to the weather. It is not safe to operate under these conditions.”

Customer: “THEN MAKE IT STOP!”

(At this point my team leader comes over, sees that I’m covered in red spots from the hail, sends me inside the control box to warm up, and takes over dealing with the angry customer. My coworkers stare at me, bewildered.)

Coworker: “What the h*** was that about?”

Me: “I’m not quite sure, but I think someone just told me to control the weather.”

Will Weather Through That Bad Grade

, , , , , , | Learning | November 3, 2017

(I am a graduate student at [University #1]. As part of my graduate coursework, I have to take a departmental seminar on how to make presentations of your research. I choose to present about a project I did as an undergraduate at [University #2]. For the project, I collected storm water runoff from roads, so I could only collect water when it was raining exceptionally hard. Because of this, I was only able to collect water on three days. I know that the project isn’t perfect, since I only had one summer to do it and $500 to spend on it. For reference, most graduate projects get tens of thousands of dollars in funding. But it is all I have to present on, because my graduate work isn’t done yet. It’s useful to note that the professor who moderates the presentation class has a reputation for being unreasonable and a bit of a show-off, and I don’t stand for it. At the end of my presentation, he goes on a rant that culminates in this exchange.)

Professor: “I just can’t believe you thought this was science. I mean, I’ve never seen a study with only three data points. Why didn’t you collect more data?”

Me: “Sorry, but the magic weather machine that makes it rain was booked up by a different department for the summer.”

(I got a C.)

The Day A Hurricane Came Through The Drive-Thru

, , , , , , , | Right | November 2, 2017

(Hurricane Harvey is in the area. While my section of Texas is clear of the core of the storm, the rain bands cause quite a bit of flooding along with, understandably, a decline of people. We have already been allowed by corporate to shut down the restaurant early if we aren’t turning a profit for six 15-minute periods straight. We are not making profits and, thankfully, the weather isn’t getting worse in our area. Therefore, the manager has decided to close the restaurant and has already posted signs on all the doors and drive-through window, and has slipped a sign behind the plastic of the menu board. I am still wearing the headset while helping my coworkers and manager, who is also wearing a headset, take care of cleaning, storage, and the like, when I hear a ping. I ignore this for a while until I hear the customer.)

Customer: “Hello, I’d like to—” *starts rattling off a 20+ item order*

Me: *interrupting the ordering* “I am sorry, sir, but we are closed due to the hurricane.”

Customer: “Yes, and I’d like ten large sodas—” *starts to rattle them off*

Me: “I am sorry, sir, but we are closed, due to the weather. We will be open again at 10:00 am tomorrow, and we do apologize for the incon—”

Customer: “I thought this was a 24/7 restaurant and, besides, it’s only 10:15!”

Me: “First, we are not 24/7. Second, even if we were, we are closing due to the storm, as indicated by the sign on the menu board.”

Customer: “Are you going to take my f****** order or not?!”

Me: “Sir, we are not able to make you anything as we have closed early. Please look at th—”

(I hear the car screech away and think this is the last of it until we hear a constant stream of honking from the window. As I’m the closest to the window, cleaning some of the equipment nearby, I decide to try again by pointing to the sign.)

Sign: “Due to inclement weather, the lobby will be closing at 8:00 pm and the drive-through will close at 10:00 pm. The store will re-open at 10:00 am without breakfast menu items. We apologize for the inconvenience.”

(They just honk their horn before trying to force open the window, at which point I get my manager.)

Me: “[Manager]! GET OVER HERE, NOW! HE’S TRYING TO BREAK OPEN OUR WINDOW!”

Manager: *grabbing the store phone and her own cell phone* “Get your cell phone ready to call the police.” *yelling through the closed window* “SIR, WE ARE CLOSED DUE TO THE HURRICANE! WE ARE TRYING TO CLEAN AND GET EVERYTHING READY FOR TOMORROW! IF YOU DO NOT LEAVE, WE ARE GOING TO CALL THE POLICE!”

(The customer starts using strings of curses and insults, and almost causes a wreck getting off of our property onto the street. After a few minutes of trying to process what happened, we all start to get back to work and think this really is end of it. Sadly, a few moments later, the phone rings and my manager answers it.)

Manager: “Thank you for calling [Restaurant]. Just to let you know, we are closed right now du—” *pause* “Sir, we have several signs up on the doors, windows, and the menu board. Furthermore, we could have called the cops on you when you attempted to break and enter. Lastly, through the window we saw you speed into the street in front of another car. If you have any issues with us closing early due to this storm, then you are free to call [Corporate Phone Number], but they were the ones to inform us that we are okay to close early as needed.”

(About two days later, we heard that the customer did indeed try to make a complaint, claiming we served other customers after he left, that we were discriminating against him, and various other bulls***. However, they were all dismissed, and his phone number, along with details from the outside cameras, were given to police for them to handle.)

Well, Aren’t You A Little Ray Of Sunshine?

, , , , , | Right | October 25, 2017

(I’m a cashier at a grocery store. I’m one of those people that dislikes heat and sunlight, and our area is finally experiencing some rain and cloudy weather.)

Customer: “I hope it turns out nice today!”

Me: “Me, too. Hopefully it won’t get too hot, though.”

Customer: *suddenly acts like I’ve insulted him* “Well, why not?

Me: “I’m more for the rain and clouds. That triple digit heat a while back was killing me.”

Customer: “Well, I have to paint today, so I hope it’s sunny!”

Me: *I start to feel a little bad* “Oh! Well, okay, yeah. I hope you don’t get rained on, then. Let’s just hope for light clouds and no hard sun for you, since you’ll be out in it.”

Customer: *gathering up his items to leave, way less uptight now* “Well, it’s okay; I’m painting inside.”

That Snow Mountain…

, , , , , , , | Working | October 20, 2017

(My mother is an x-ray technician at a large hospital in Alabama, and it should be noted that she grew up in the Rocky Mountains of Nevada. One day, everyone starts rushing around frantically, and half the staff are heading home early. When she asks, she is told…)

Coworker #1: “I have to get up the mountain before the storm hits!”

Mom: “Mountain? What mountain? And what do you mean, ‘before the storm hits?’”

Coworker #1: “They just announced a snowstorm is going to hit Huntsville, starting in just a few hours. They’ve already cancelled schools and sent the kids home early. But a lot of us live on the other side of the mountain, so we need to get there before the storm hits, or we’ll never make it!”

Mom: “Again, what mountain? There are no mountains around here.”

(After a few more rounds of useless talk, and hearing the weather report for herself, she finally drags the coworker to a window.)

Mom: “What mountain?!”

Coworker #1: “Over there!”

Mom: *squints* “That’s not a mountain. That’s a hill. Maybe. More like a gentle rise.”

(Just then, another hospital employee comes up with a clipboard, looking rather harried.)

Nurse: “Okay, [Mom]… [Mom]…. Oh! Right. Your ride is [Coworker #2], and he’ll be there to pick you up at 5:30 tomorrow.”

Mom: “My ride? I drive myself, thanks. And my shift doesn’t start until 8:00, anyway.”

Nurse: “Oh, I know. But with all the snow, most people won’t be able to make it in. So, we’ve dropped to the bare essential staff, and everyone with four-wheel-drive is going around to pick up everybody else. You’re on [Coworker #2]’s route, and he’ll be there at 5:30.”

Mom: “You do realize I’m from Nevada, right? Rocky Mountains? Snow? My car has front-wheel drive. I’ll be here for my shift. You can take me off the list.”

Nurse: “But you need four-wheel-drive to drive in snow! What if you don’t make it? What if you crash? The ambulances won’t get to you in time!”

Mom: “We’re expecting ‘up to an inch.’ It’s not exactly a blizzard. I’ll be fine. Take my name off the list, because if someone comes pounding on my door at 5:30, my husband and I will not be pleased.”

(Mom left at her normal time and made it home, on the other side of the “mountain,” just fine. A little slow, due to traffic, but fine. The next morning, she likewise made it into work without incident, and was the only person who was well-rested, having slept her normal eight hours, instead of carpooling in hours early.)

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