I went to a technology store in a mall. The workers in this store do not have a uniform. They have to keep up a fairly good appearance, clean shoes, no profanity and such on shirts, and they are presentable, but otherwise, they just have a casual attire. The one thing to distinguish that they work there is these bright, yellow, neon lanyards.

I went in the store by myself to look at the headphones, listen to the music playing on them to see if they’re a good fit and how they sound, and then delicately put them back. I’m wearing a gray shirt and black pants, which just so happens to be the attire of someone else who’s working currently, but I didn’t know this until later.

I was approached by this woman who gave me a stern look. I thought maybe she just wanted to test the headphones, too, and moved to another shelf.

Woman: “Excuse me?!”

I didn’t know she was talking to me, so I kept looking at the current shelf until I got two hard taps on my shoulder.

Woman: “EXCUSE ME?!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I in your way?”

Woman: “I need some assistance.”

Me: “Assistance?”

Woman: “YES!”

Me: “Did you need some help with some headphones?”

Woman: “NO! I need to look at this camera on the display shelf.”

I looked behind her and see the display shelf.

Me: “You’ll need someone to open it up for you. There’s a worker over there.”

I pointed at a worker standing next to the computers, chatting to a customer, and resumed browsing.

Woman: “EXCUSE ME?! DO YOUR JOB!”

Me: “My… job?”

Woman: “YES! WHERE IS YOUR LANYARD?! DON’T YOU PEOPLE WEAR LANYARDS?! I SAW YOU EARLIER AND YOU WERE WEARING A LANYARD!”

Admittedly, I was kind of confused. I’m a cleaner at a hotel, and the master key I use is on a lanyard which I never take off at work, but I had traveled two hours away from home and the hotel to this mall.

Me: “Do… you know me?”

She went red, and her eyes bulged so large that I thought they were going to fall out.

Woman: “WHY WOULD I KNOW YOU?! YOU WORK IN SOME COMPUTER STORE AND ARE WASTING MY TIME! GET YOUR LANYARD! WHERE IS IT?!”

Of course, this scene got the eyes and ears of other customers and a worker — a worker wearing a gray shirt, black pants, and a lanyard.

Worker: “Is everything okay over here?”

Woman: “I WANT THI—”

She turned and stopped mid-sentence. She turned back to me, face red and eyes bulging, and then turned back to the worker.

Let me tell you, the worker and I looked nothing alike. I’m much shorter than him, my skin is slightly darker, and my hair is what I like to call a contained mess while his actually knew what a hairbrush was. We both were just wearing a similar outfit.

Woman: “But… I…”

Worker: “Do you need help with something?”

She didn’t even reply. She just walked past me and left the store. The worker asked if everything was okay and I explained. We both had a laugh out of it, and he rang me up and I left with my new headphones.

I work at an escape room where I am required to give a speech about the rules before you go into the room. I’ve got it down so well I could tell it in my sleep and know for a fact I say everything.

One of our rules is that red locks in the room won’t open, they’re just for staff. This particular group is not paying attention whatsoever while I’m telling the rules, claiming that they’re fine and don’t need the rules because they’ve been here before. I’m still going through the speech because I don’t recognize them.

At one point they start taking selfies with each other during the rules clearly ignoring everything I’m saying. I finish up the rules and the story for the room and get them in there.

About five minutes into their game:

Customer: *Messing with a red lock.*

Me: *Over the screen.* “No need to mess with the red locks.”

Customer: “Well, why didn’t she tell us that in the beginning?!”

I’m a fully-functioning, college-educated adult. I live with my parents because I found a job in my hometown, and rent or property costs are extremely expensive around here. My boss is a bit of an airhead, and my mom is a bit of a worry-wart.

I get home one day, and my mom rushes to meet me at the door and wrap me in a big hug.

Mom: “Oh, thank God! You’re safe!”

Me: “Um… yeah? Why wouldn’t I be safe?”

Mom: “[Boss] called me this morning. He said you weren’t in your office today. The door was locked and the lights were off.”

Me: “I was definitely there. I had an IBS flare-up…”

My boss and most coworkers know I have IBS, in case it ever interferes with my work.

Me: “…so I went down to the restroom a few times, but otherwise, I was there all day. I talked to multiple people who could confirm that. I wonder why [Boss] went straight to calling you instead of calling my cell phone or talking to anyone else in the office.”

Mom: “I don’t know, but I’ve been panicking all day that you were dead in a car crash or something. Thank God you’re okay!”

I talked to my boss the next day to tell him to call ME next time he needs to know where I am, instead of calling my mother. I also told my mom that she can always call me herself to find out where I am. She had somehow never thought of that option after my boss called her.

Customer: “How big of a rib roast for three people?”

Me: “I’d do two ribs.”

Customer: “Let’s do three. I want leftovers.”

Me: “You’ll have leftovers with the two ribs.”

Customer: “We’re big eaters. I’ll take three.”

I hand it to her.

Customer: “Whoa! This is waaaay too much. Cut one rib off of it!”

A woman comes up to my desk with a stack of books and tells me that she needs to run out to her car to get her purse. She gets as far as the door, laughs, and comes back to the desk.

Customer: “I had my purse on my arm the whole time.”

After she pays for her books, all the while making little shame-faced jokes about her bad memory, I say:

Me: “Can I tell you a little story that might make you feel better?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “This morning, my husband and I took the dog for a walk, and then he was going to drive me to work. I needed to stop at the corner store on the way to get a drink. After I got my drink, I walked out of the store and proceeded to walk to work. I got about half a block before I remembered that my husband was still waiting in the parking lot around the corner of the building, so he didn’t see me leave. Fortunately, he has a sense of humour.”

The customer told me I had indeed made her feel less embarrassed. I wish someone could do the same for me.

This story is part of our International Day Of Happiness roundup!

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