(Our store has a credit card, and you get a coupon when you open one with us. It works on anything, but only for one day. A lady comes up to me with UGGs — almost always excluded from coupons — and this happens:)

Customer: “I’d like to buy these with my coupon, but if I need to return them, how can I get my coupon back?”

Me: “Well, none of the coupons we have available today work on UGGs, but if you’re referring to our rewards discounts, those are treated like cash for your card and would be refunded.”

Customer: “No, I have a coupon; it’ll work on anything, even makeup!”

Me: “I mean, if you show me your coupon I can try, but no promises.”

Customer: “It’ll work. I got it for opening up an account and never used it.”

(Sure enough, it is the old coupon for opening the account, so I give in and try.)

Me: “Okay, since this is for opening an account, it should work; I’ll try it and see.”

Customer: “It does work; I used it on another pair of UGGs before.”

Me: *pause* “I’m sorry?”

Customer: *catching her slip up* “Oh! I mean they sent me two… but, uh, if I return these, how will I get my discount back?

Me: “I can make a note on the receipt that if that’s the case that you’re to get the discount for that day, instead, since this is all you’re buying today, but I’ll still have to mark the coupon for use.”

Customer: “What? I don’t want them, then, if you’re going to mark the coupon.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “No one’s ever marked it before.”

Me: *I stare at her as she now admits to using it before* “Well, they’re supposed to.”

Customer: “But they don’t, so you are?”

Me: “Well, yeah. I have to.”

Customer: *in a huff, grabbing the coupon from my hands* “Then I’m just going to come in another day!”

(Of course, the next day, when I wasn’t working, the shoes were sold.)

(I work at a well-known retail chain as a cashier. We’re doing a temporary fundraiser for diabetes research and have to ask each customer if they’d like to donate some money towards the cause. My father has diabetes.)

Me: “Hello! Would you like to donate to help diabetes research today?”

Customer: “No, sweetie. I believe that if you just don’t eat white flour or sugar, the whole diabetes thing disappears!”

Me: *stares at her in disbelief for a few seconds* “Would you like a bag?”

(She needs to either get her head out of the organic movement or do some research on diabetes. It can’t merely be fixed by eating differently, ma’am!)

Related:
What A Diabeetus, Part 5
What A Diabeetus, Part 4
What A Diabeetus, Part 3

(I am a teenager, working in a department store. One day I am on the shop floor with my mum, who has come to meet me on my lunch break. Due to a combination of the hot weather and having skipped breakfast, out of nowhere, I faint. My mum puts me in the recovery position and some of my colleagues start to come over to see if I’m okay. Amidst the commotion, a customer comes over, sees my uniform, and bends over to where I am LYING ON THE FLOOR.)

Customer: “Excuse me. What time do you close today?”

Me: *too woozy and shocked to think of another response* “4:30.”

(The customer walked off without even a thank-you.)

This story is part of the second Heatwave roundup!

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Read the second Heatwave roundup!

(I am a cashier. Today is Wednesday. I have just finished ringing up an order for a customer when she asks me:)

Customer #1: “Why didn’t the $5-off-$50 work with using my online coupons?”

Me: “I’m sorry; was that going today?”

Customer #1: *snippily* “Yes!”

(As I’m searching through her redeemed/clipped coupons trying to find out if she clipped it, the customer next to her turns to her and said:)

Customer #2: “That doesn’t start until Friday.”

Customer #1: “Why did it send me an email now, then?!”

Customer #2: “Probably, to let us know what’s going on this weekend.”

Customer #1: “That’s ridiculous. They should send an email the day of!”

(Thursday, I am working the customer service desk when I get a phone call from a customer.)

Me: “Hi, [Store] service desk. How may I help you?”

Customer #3: “Hi, I spent a really long time in the checkout lanes today trying to redeem that $5-off-$50 with my online coupons.”

Me: “I’m sorry! That coupon doesn’t start until Friday.”

Customer #3: “Why didn’t the cashier tell me, then?!”

Me: *super politely* “I’m sorry, but even I didn’t know that that started on Friday until yesterday.”

Customer #3: “We have memos about that! Do you guys not have memos that let you know what’s going on?!”

Me: “We do not.”

Customer #3: “That is absolutely ridiculous. It’s no big deal, then.” *hangs up*

Me: *turns to coworker and explains what happened* “She’s not wrong in saying we need memos. I hate coming to work and not knowing anything about what’s on sale or what our online couponing service is having as a special, until later in the week, after we’ve already had tons of issues with it.”

(I am working in a large department store. We have staff discounts that also cover immediate family’s purchases. We aren’t allowed to serve family members or friends ourselves; the company is really strict about giving discounts. I get called to the counter.)

Coworker: “There’s a lady over there who asked for you; she said she’s a friend.”

(I recognise the lady as someone my sister knows; I barely know or even like her.)

Lady: “Hi, [My Name], I need to buy this stuff. Your sister said you’ll give me a discount.”

Me: “I can’t give you a discount.”

Lady: “Yes, your sister said you would; you can use your staff discount.”

Me: “No, I’m not allow to do that. Staff discounts can only be done by a manager, and only with family. It’s not up to [Sister] to promise that to you.”

Lady: “Well, tell the manager I am your sister.”

(It’s very obvious that we are different nationalities.)

Me: “The manager knows what my sister looks like, and you have just told [Coworker] that we’re friends; I can’t do it.”

(I knew that if I gave in to her that I would never see the end of it, and she and my sister’s other friends would be in constantly demanding discounts.)