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If Only Your Customers Were As Sweet As Candy

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Hikariyang | January 5, 2022

I am working at my local grocery store in a lower-income part of town. Our store is having a bit of a promotion; every time someone buys something, a $5-off coupon prints out with the receipt. It is one coupon per customer, per order, and they have to spend at least $5 before the coupon will even go through.

One day, this older gentleman walks up to the cash register with his little handful of items. It all rings up to about $4.35. He then hands me the $5-off coupon.

Me: “Oh, sorry, I can’t use that right now. You need to have at least $5 worth of stuff before that can go through. Is there anything else you want?”

Customer: “No, this is it. I don’t want anything else. Just use the coupon.”

Me: “I can’t use it until you reach $5. We sell bags for $0.11 if you want some of those?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want any bags! I just want what I have and for you to use the coupon!”

I know I could probably just charge him for the bags so the coupon will go through, but I hate charging people for things that they don’t end up taking with them — it slightly feels like stealing — so I decide to try some other things.

Me: “How about one of the candy bars? It’ll be enough to push you over $5.”

The man huffs, grabs the closest candy bar, and hands it to me. I scan the candy and coupon. He ends up being $0.23 over. The transaction proceeds as normal, minus the grumpy attitude of the dude. After receiving his change, he proceeds to chuck it into the back of the room.

Customer: “I don’t like chocolate bars!”

The guy ranted about it to himself for a minute before my supervisor came over to ask what was wrong. He told her that I wouldn’t use his coupon and that I forced him to buy candy and he doesn’t even like it. She then turned to me and told me that I should have just charged him for bags.

And Then He’ll Complain That They’re Understaffed

, , , | Right | January 4, 2022

A customer gives me a voucher I don’t recognize.

Me: “I’ll need a manager to double-check this voucher. It looks different than what I’m used to, and I’m still pretty new at the job.”

The customer gets angry that it’s taking so long.

Me: “Sorry, but I’d rather not lose my job for processing this incorrectly.”

Customer: “I don’t care if you lose your job! Just do the voucher!”

Looks Like This One’s Gonna Be A Wash

, , , | Right | December 30, 2021

I worked at a car wash in college. A competitor a half-mile down the road offered a deal where you bought a $15 car wash, and your next wash was half off.

Customer: “Will you honor this half-off coupon from [Competitor]? You shouldn’t be willing to lose a sale when I can just take my business elsewhere.”

Even after I explained how silly it was to expect a discount when you haven’t spent any money there initially, she still doubled down that I shouldn’t be willing to lose a sale.

Me: “Ma’am, if you want the discounted rate, you can go to the business that sold you the coupon.”

Should Have Bought An iVoucher Max Pro

, , , , | Right | December 24, 2021

Customer: “I have a coupon for a free iPad.”

The customer hands over an obviously fake coupon. The fine print says: “Guaranteed and payable by Bill Gates.”

Me: “Why would Bill Gates pay for an Apple product?”

The customer realized their blunder and quickly left!

The Couponator 31: Saved By The Next Generation

, , , , | Right | December 8, 2021

A customer and her teenage son are checking out.

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, this coupon has expired.”

Customer: “No, put it through!”

Me: “I’m afraid the system won’t let me put through an expired coupon.”

She holds up the line because her expired coupon won’t take 25 cents off her order.

Customer: *Demanding.* “Get me your manager!”

Her son rolls his eyes and says:

Customer’s Son: “Mom, I’ll give you the 25 cents, let’s go.”

After that she finally left, thanks to her son!

The Couponator 30: Managerial Override
The Couponator 29: A Cents-less Tragedy
The Couponator 28: Panic Attack!
The Couponator 27: Red Friday
The Couponator 26: Father’s Day