They’re Speaking Both Physically And Mentally

, , , , | Right | May 7, 2020

I work at a taxi call center where we receive and send out the addresses of people’s whereabouts to the cab drivers. In all cases, we must receive an accurate address. This happens more than you would think.

Me: “[Taxi Company], good afternoon!”

Caller: “Yeah, hi, can you hang on for a moment? I don’t know where I am.”

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A Little Wet Behind The Ears

, , , , , | Working | April 22, 2020

(It’s a pretty slow day and I’m working with a new hire. He’s very nice and funny but also sort of slow with some things, and a little clueless. A customer walks up.)

Customer: “I’d like a dry gin.”

New Hire: *visibly confused* “But it’s a liquid.”

Me: *losing my marbles and trying to professionally hide it*

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Lack Of Register Does Not Register, Part 13

, , , , , | Right | January 28, 2020

(We have two functioning tills, but we only open the second one when it gets busy and we have enough people. Currently, we have one till open. A man goes up to the second till.)

Coworker #1: “Excuse me, that till is closed. Can I get you to come over here so we can serve you?”

Customer: “No. I want to be served here.”

Coworker #1: “I see, but seeing as that till is closed, you won’t be. Please come over here.”

Customer: “No. You will serve me here.”

(My coworker shrugs and goes back to other customers, while the man just crosses his arms and stands at the till. A second coworker shows up two minutes later for his shift and notices the man.)

Coworker #2: “Sorry, seems like that till is closed. Can you please move over to the line by the other till?”

Customer: “No! I want two mulled wines, here!”

Coworker #2: “I’m sorry, but you’re gonna have to go over to the line to be served.”

Customer: “I can’t believe you won’t just serve me here.”

Coworker #2: “We’ll serve you over at the other till.”

Customer: “I’ll wait here.”

([Coworker #2] also just shrugs and goes to work. I’m standing awkwardly in the middle, minding the baked goods and the oven, listening to the man huff and puff. I notice people start to queue behind him.)

Me: *directed to the people behind him* “Sorry, can you please move to the line by the other till, where we’re serving people?”

(The other people very politely move, while the man dramatically throws out his arms.)

Customer: “I want to be served here! Why is that so hard?!”

(In the end, he stood there for twenty minutes before he got the hint and left. We still talk about him at work.)

Related:
Lack Of Register Does Not Register, Part 12
Lack Of Register Does Not Register, Part 11
Lack Of Register Does Not Register, Part 10

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Unfiltered Story #180433

, , | Unfiltered | December 26, 2019

(Every time you buy a recyclable bottle you pay a small deposit that you can get back when you return it. I’m a store clerk currently training a new hire.)

Customer: “I placed two bottles.”

(The customer starts staring intently down his wallet.)

Me: *to the new hire* “Just go and look and confirm that.”

(We both see one bottle.)

Me: “Now go ahead and subtract that single bottle from the total.”

New Hire: “All right, sir, your total is [total minus one bottle].”

(Customer pays and smirks.)

Customer: “See, and that’s why you should always check, next time I’ll just say five and have you subtract that.”

 (Leaves.)

New Hire: “Does he… seriously think he cheated us?”

Me: “Yeah… well, that’ll teach you to always check.”

Will Not Be Influenced By The Influencer, Part 2

, , , , | Right | October 18, 2019

(I recently started working in a café in a fancy neighborhood, the kind that gets snobby ladies with their small dogs. The kitchen just closed and we’re getting the last orders out to the customers. I approach a table with two ladies sitting and give them their food.)

Customer: *snaps her fingers* “Sweetie, sorry, but I also ordered fries.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but the kitchen gave me everything for your order. Let me just go check.”

(I highly doubt the kitchen has forgotten to make her fries, as they always closely check orders, but I check, and there’s nothing there for her. By now, the kitchen has been mostly cleaned and closed.)

Me: “Sorry, there really isn’t anything else. The kitchen is closed, but I can give you a free slice of cake after you’ve eaten, instead?”

Customer: “Ugh, no, I can’t have cake!”

Me: “Well… Should I bring you some more bread?”

Customer: “I can’t have bread, either!”

(I eye her bread bowl; she’s eating our other kind of bread so it isn’t a gluten allergy.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m out of options now.”

Customer: “But I’m going to be hungry! This isn’t enough; I wanted my fries! Young lady, I am a highly influential person on Instagram! I have over fifteen thousand followers! I just posted about being here; you’re going to lose a lot of customers! I’ll tell all of my friends!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you didn’t want any of the options I gave you, so I don’t know what to tell you.”

Customer: “I’ll tell my fifteen thousand followers about this!”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but the kitchen is closed.”

(With that, I walked off and BARELY made it behind the counter before I burst into laughter. She really tried to threaten us with her fifteen thousand followers!)

Related:
Will Not Be Influenced By The Influencer

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