Prepay No Way

, , , | Working | September 24, 2018

I always pay food delivery drivers with cash on delivery. Today my roommate decides to pay, but she uses her card to prepay.

The average delivery time for this store is usually 20 to 30 minutes. Our food doesn’t show up for an hour and a half! We call the store after the first hour, and it seems they’ve forgotten us. The manager says he’ll give us store credit in compensation, but it never shows up on the account.

Since then, my roommate has sworn off prepaying, as I have. Our food hasn’t been late since.

Don’t Bring Jesus Into The Bedroom

, , , , | Working | September 11, 2018

(My husband and I recently ordered some toys for the bedroom online because we figured we might give it a try. Fast forward to the day of arrival. We get woken up by loud bangs on the door, which I find odd since we have a loud and functioning doorbell, but since I’m fairly confident it must be for a good reason, I go and sleepily open the door. I am greeted by the angry face of a delivery driver in his mid-40s.)

Driver: “You are a disgrace to Jesus.”

Me: *trying to not fall asleep where I stand* “Wha…?”

Driver: “I am not giving you this.”

(This is where I notice the large package in his hands. It’s ripped open and barely taped together on one side. I also start to understand what’s going on.)

Me: “I don’t need your opinion on my purchases, thank you very much.”

Driver: “I am not giving you this. I can’t have you insult Jesus!”

Me: “Give. Me. My. Package.”

Driver: “NO!” *stomps off*

Me: *baffled*

Not A Good Tempura-ture

, , , , , , , | Working | August 18, 2018

I ordered some food from a popular food delivery service. They gave me an ETA of 1:21 pm. By 1:45 pm I hadn’t received anything, so I messaged the company via the app requesting an update. They told me the driver had left and my food should arrive any minute. Still nothing at 2:00 pm, but the delivery service called me to check in. The rep said the restaurant was saying the driver delivered my food at 12:47 pm.

I told them no, that I’d been home and no one had knocked or rung the doorbell. The rep was adamant that my food had been delivered, so I checked my front porch. Sure enough, the driver had left my raw fish on my front porch in 80-degree weather!

Apparently, the driver swore he handed my food over to an actual person, but seeing as how I was home alone, that does not check out.

The restaurant demanded I return the food in order to get a refund. They clearly didn’t believe me, so I hope they saw how soggy my tempura was and how questionable the shrimp had become!

They’re Colder Than The Fridge

, , , , , | Working | June 28, 2018

(After nearly twenty years of verbal and physical abuse from my overbearing father, my mum has finally worked up the courage to leave him. The council allocates us a new house, and most of our furniture is odd bits and pieces donated by relatives. The only luxuries Mum has allowed herself are a new carpet, and kitchen appliances. She tries to order a fridge from [Catalogue], but on the day of delivery we get a call to say the lorry’s broken down and we’ll get the fridge next week. Bearing in mind we have eaten microwave meals for a week — as we only have a microwave — and the fact my brother is special needs, Mum rings to ask if it can be delivered sooner. The customer services woman sounds like she really couldn’t care less, and Mum complains about her, but it is agreed the fridge will be delivered the next day. Next afternoon, we get a phone call from the delivery men.)

Delivery Man: “Right, well, we can’t find your house on the GPS, ’cause it’s a new build, isn’t it?”

Mum: “Yes, the rest of [Street] is a building site. If you tell me where you are–“

Delivery Man: *shouting* “Just give us the f****** street names, would you? We’re from Bristol. We don’t know this f****** town.”

Mum: *in tears* “I’m sorry, but I don’t like your attitude. You know what? Just leave it. I’ll get a fridge from somewhere else–“

Delivery Man: “S***.”

(My mum hangs up on him, sobbing about men and how horrible people are these days. After giving her a hug, I convince her to ring up to complain, but before she can, she gets a call from a nice customer service woman. The nice woman assures her she did nothing wrong, writes down directions to our house, and promises that the delivery men will be on their best behaviour. A few minutes later, we see the white lorry reverse down our half-finished street. We know they’ll be trouble before they even come to the door, because a builder asks them to move to one side so they can get a forklift down to the building site.)

Delivery Man: “F*** off, mate.”

(The builder backs off, but keeps an eye on them, as do the rest of his team.)

Mum: *opens the door, and looks at the delivery men’s muddy shoes* “I’m really sorry, but would you mind taking your shoes off? I have a new carpet and—”

Delivery Man: “No, can’t do that. Look, do you want this f****** fridge or not?”

Mum: *finally losing her temper* “You know what? Just forget it. FORGET IT! Just take the d*** thing back and I’ll get my money back.”

(She closed the door on them. Grumbling, they went back to their lorry and sped off. The builders waited until they’d left before resuming their work. Needless to say, we’re going to order a fridge from somewhere else.)

It’s All In The (Lack Of) Delivery, Part 5

, , , | Working | June 21, 2018

(I am waiting for a delivery at home. I live on the top floor with no elevator. I have some problems with my prosthetic and have to use crutches.)

Delivery Man: *on speakerphone* “Your delivery is here.”

Me: “Okay, bring it up, please. It’s [Name].”

Delivery Man: “No, I can’t bring it up. Come down.”

Me: “I am unable to carry the package. Could you please come to my door?”

Delivery Man: *rather rudely* “No, you’ve got one minute to pick it up.”

(I walk down. He looks at me, then at the package, and then back at me. I take the slip and sign for it.)

Delivery Man: “Are you able to carry this up the stairs?”

Me: *with a grin* “No, that is why I ordered it to be delivered.”

Related:
It’s All In The (Lack Of) Delivery, Part 4
It’s All In The (Lack Of) Delivery, Part 3
It’s All In The (Lack Of) Delivery, Part 2

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