I work for a tool shop. This guy comes in, clearly on something, and asks to return an item.

Me: “Sir, our store discontinued that item three years ago.”

Customer: “I bought it five days ago! I need the money back to feed my daughter. She’s starving!”

I tell him the policy on returns.

Me: “That item is no longer in the system. I can’t do your return.”

Customer: *Irate* “I want a manager!”

My manager tells him the same thing. He’s still angry but he leaves.

A few minutes later, we get a call and I answer. It’s someone that wants to talk to the manager.

Me: “What is this regarding? Maybe I can help. My manager is ringing out a customer right now.”

Customer: “I just tried returning an item and I was refused because it was out of policy because of it being discontinued.”

I go blue screen of death for a minute and realize it is the guy from a few minutes ago.

Me: “Please hold.” *To my manager* “The guy who wanted to make that return is on the phone.”

Manager: “Wait, what?”

She picks up the phone, tells him the same policy, and hangs up. He comes back inside.

Customer: “I’m going to get my truck and drive it through your window unless you do my return! Don’t you care about a starving child?!”

Thankfully, security was in the building and escorted the guy from the building. We never heard from him again. Security made sure we had protection for the rest of the shift until closing. We tried calling the police, but they never came. It was pretty scary.

I’m a freelancer doing a website for this couple. I did the wife’s website first three years ago when she asked me to help her because her website was down, the thing is she just forgot to pay her server, charged her really low because we’re good friends. Everything was good, I gave her all her log-in details, told her to change her password, etc.

Two years ago the husband asked me to do three websites for him. The husband choose a host server that I had never heard of before, and he did it without consulting or asking advice. It was a confusing server to work with and required a lot of customization to get what he wanted. I managed to finish the websites. I remind him if there are changes required to the website then let me know first. All is good, and I am paid. Again, I charge less because we’re good friends.

For the third website, he asks me to make an “NGO” website. I make a demo on my own server to show him if he likes it. He doesn’t make any payment and I don’t hear from him for a couple of months. All of a sudden he emails me to meet because he moved his domain to another server that I never heard off, again without notifying me, so I didn’t have time to make an updated backup. There’s an error on the first website and I can’t work with the confusing host server so I tell him to find somebody else, and I will give him all the content and the old backup that I have.

He agrees and emails me to send the backup to the new web developer, which I do. He emails again asking for the demo website. I politely tell him that I did the demo and it’s there’s very little left to do, so if he wants it he has to pay: half of the full price, because who would just give something they did for countless hours for free so their new web developer can just upload it to their server and get paid?

He finds my rate too high apparently, so he starts asking “didn’t I get paid already per hour?”. Just to be clear, the first two websites were paid for the whole website. I politely tell him that he was not paying me for the hour but he’s insisting on how much should I charge per hour. I again reply that I don’t charge per hour but charge for the whole website.

Then, he asks me if I’m paying taxes. I don’t reply because I have no obligation to tell people – even clients – regarding my personal finances, etc. He emails me again insisting to answer him so can I come up with what he considers a “lump sum” of money but only if he knows who is paying taxes. I still do not reply.

Then here comes the threat: If I don’t want to answer him, I will answer one way or another because he will report me for tax fraud; seems like extortion to get my demo for free. I block him and his wife on social media, and all of a sudden the wife’s website is down. Instead of emailing me her issue, she goes on Facebook and accuses me and my boyfriend of blocking her website. Like I’m really gonna waste my time anymore on their websites?

And BTW, if your website is down why don’t you contact your host provider first, maybe you forgot to pay again…

I’ve just finished printing off pre-sale tickets for a customer and gesture the next customer up to the box office. He immediately gives me attitude.

Customer: “It’s ridiculous that I had to wait so long to get helped! I’ve been in line for at least fifteen minutes! I should get a discount or something!”

Me: “Sir, we opened less than five minutes ago and you’re only the third customer I’ve helped so far today.”

Customer: *Sheepish* “Oh.”

The rest of the transaction proceeded smoothly. I love the look on people’s faces when they try to pull a stunt like that and are immediately proven to have lied.

I work in a store that sells both food and clothing. The food hall and clothing section are next to each other and connect directly but are manned by two different departments.

Our store closes at 6:00 pm. Announcements are played ten minutes before and at closing time. When 6:00 pm arrives, we make sure the food hall is cleared of customers and then lock the door.

About fifteen minutes later, a colleague approaches me.

Colleague: “There’s still a customer in the store.”

I wonder how on Earth we missed him. I go find him, and he is on his phone talking loudly about how “no one will help him.”

Me: “Hello, sir, come with me and I’ll let you out.”

Rather than trying to find the keyholder, I decide to let him out through the staff exit. I swipe my card and walk through the first door, the customer following me. Just as I am about to open the second door…

Customer: “Are you a manager?”

Me: “No, I’m not, but I can let you out—”

Customer: “Why won’t anyone help me?”

Me: “I am, sir, and—”

The customer cuts me off and starts ranting. Apparently, he bought £110 worth of clothes and put them in a bag, then left the bag on the floor whilst he went to look at something else. When he came back, the bag of clothes was gone. He is furious about this, saying that a member of staff stole them and that he wants every staff member searched, and to check the CCTV. I have no authority to do either, but I try to calm him down, to no avail.

Me: “Do you need a manager?”

Customer: “Yes! I can’t believe this! I’ll wait here while you get one!”

Me: “Sorry, sir, but I can’t leave you on this side of the staff door. You’ll have to come back onto the shop floor with me.”

So, back we go, and luckily, a manager appears and deals with the customer. I head back to my colleagues, and some of the clothing colleagues are there, too. All are talking about this customer.

Clothing Colleague: “He came over to us and started ranting. We got a manager who tried to see if anyone who had access to the CCTV was still in the store, but because he wasn’t being helped immediately, he headed your way.”

Eventually, the customer leaves and the manager comes over.

Me: “What happened?”

Manager: “We have no access to the CCTV tonight, so I told him to come back in tomorrow when [Other Manager] is in. He claims he has a flight to Lagos tomorrow morning, so he wanted the £110 taken from the till as ‘compensation.’ I told him that was not going to happen and either he comes back tomorrow or he contacts head office. He stormed off.”

The CCTV was checked the following day and there was no bag of clothes anywhere on the shop floor. And surprise, surprise, the customer never came back. 

We suspect he deliberately came in at closing time knowing we wouldn’t be able to do anything, so then we would just give him the money to get rid of him. Unluckily for him, his little scam didn’t work! But even if it was genuine, who on Earth would leave a bag of clothes unattended like that? If this had been in a railway station, the bomb squad would have been called!

A woman tries to pay for her bill — £40 worth of cocktails — with a pharmacy chain’s loyalty card.

Me: “I’m sorry, madam, this isn’t possible.”

Customer: “I’m going to get the money out.”

I follow her and see her trying to get into a taxi. I challenge her.

Me: “Madam! I need the £40!”

She runs at me, belly first, and screams:

Customer: “I’M PREGNANT!”

She then proceeded to wet herself, claiming her water had broken.