(A couple comes up to the register with some jewelry-making supplies and I give them their total.)

Customer: “This was $1.74! It said that it was $1.74 over there!”

Me: “Okay, can you show me? Because if it was in the wrong spot, I can—”

Customer: “It wasn’t in the wrong spot! I even scanned it at one of the price checkers and it said $1.74!”

(She takes me over to the price checker.)

Customer: “As you can clearly see—”

(She scans the item. The screen on the price checker says $2.49.)

Customer: “That said $1.74 before! I swear to God, it said $1.74!”

Me: “Well, let’s go over to where you found it and see if there was a sign put up by mistake or something.”

(We go over to where she found the item. It is clearly marked $2.49, and there are no sale signs. She grudgingly accepts that she was wrong and goes back to the register. I give her the total, but she and her husband are not happy with it.)

Customer: “Why aren’t these all 50% off? There was a sign there that said 50% off!”

Customer’s Husband: “You can even see it from here! There’s a 50%-off sign!”

Me: “I’m pretty sure the sale is only on beads. I was just over there, and there was no sign in that panel. I can go over and show you if you want.”

Customer’s Husband: “How about this? How about we just don’t buy anything, and leave?”

Me: *pause* “Okay?”

Customer’s Husband: “This is unbelievable! You’ve got all these signs in that general area, so that should mean that everything there is 50% off!”

(My manager has been at the register next to me this whole time and overhears this.)

Manager: “Our signs are put up panel by panel, sir.”

Customer’s Husband: “DON’T GIVE ME THAT!”

(The two of them walked out without buying anything. I told them, quietly enough so that no one would hear, to have a terrible day.)

(I work selling tickets at a large movie theater chain.)

Customer: “Can I get two tickets for [Movie] at 3:30 pm?”

Me: “I am sorry, sir, but the movie began at 3:00 pm. The previews are actually about twenty minutes long, so you still have time to go in.”

Customer: “NO! I want the 3:30 show time.”

Me: “Sir, there is no 3:30 show time.”

Customer: “DON’T PLAY STUPID WITH ME! I KNOW THERE IS A 3:30 SCREENING, YOU IDIOT. SEE?!”

(He pulls out his phone and slams it against the box office glass. I motion for him to slide his phone through the small opening and make sure he is watching carefully as I scroll up to the top of the show time page)

Me: “Sir, as you can see, these are the show times for our location in California. You are currently in Florida.”

(He couldn’t even look me in the eyes after I slid his phone back. He proceeded to walk off without another word.)

(I am wearing black slacks, high heels, and a grey polo with a logo from the car dealership I work for. The staff in the hardware store wear jeans and bright orange aprons. I am in the garden section, and I ask an employee if they have any succulents left because it’s late in the season. She goes off to check, and about two minutes later an older man stops about fifteen feet away and raises his voice so I can hear him.)

Customer: “Hey! Hey, you! Where are the hose nozzles?”

Me: “Um, I don’t work here.”

Customer: “You don’t?!”

Me: “Nope!” *points to logo on my shirt* “I work for [Dealership].

Customer: “So, you don’t know where the hose nozzles are.”

(I raise an eyebrow and shake my head, and he walks away a little pissed off. Soon the actual store employee returns and points me in the right direction; she even opens their brand new shipment so I can get fresh ones! As I am picking through the succulents and putting them in my cart, ANOTHER customer walks over to me. I am currently bending over to get a closer look at some plants on the lower rows, and this middle-aged man bends over next to me.)

Customer: “I have a chainsaw, and I need some new chains, but I need a very specific—”

Me: “I don’t mean to be rude and cut you off, sir, but I don’t work here.”

(The customer leans back and looks at me like I’m crazy.)

Customer: “You don’t work here? Are you sure?”

Me: *points to logo on shirt* “Yeah, pretty sure I don’t.”

Customer: “Can you show me, anyway?”

Me: “I honestly wouldn’t know the first place to look, and quite frankly, I’m not going over to the chainsaws with a man I don’t know.” *laughs*

(The guy suddenly gets angry. I think he is getting angry over my joke, but it turns out he is pissed I don’t know where the chainsaw chains are.)

Customer: “Well, thanks for absolutely nothing. Thank God I own a [Different Model than the one I work for].”

(He turns and literally stomps away. I yell after him.)

Me: “Maybe you should try looking for someone actually wearing a orange apron? They’re super helpful!”

(He flipped me off as he turned the corner. Thank goodness he doesn’t own a [Company Model]!)

(I work as a receptionist at a car dealership.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Dealership]! How can I direct your call?”

Customer: “I just want to refill my prescription.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Can you repeat that? I think I might have misheard what you said.”

Customer: “What did you say?”

Me: “Can you please repeat what you said at the beginning of the call? I think I might have misheard you.”

Customer: “Do you need my prescription number?”

Me: “Ma’am, this is a car dealership.”

Customer: “What?! Do you need my prescription number?”

Me: “No, ma’am, this is a car dealership. You may have dialed the wrong number.”

Customer: “You know what? I’ll just call back later.”

(She hung up before I could explain to her this was not a pharmacy. I just hope she was able to get her prescription!)

(I recently moved to a new state, and I figure I’ll check out the local labor office to see what information they have on employment.)

Representative: “What was your last job?”

Me: “Four years at [Factory]; two as a temp, and two as a full-hire.”

Representative: “This is quite a long resumé.”

Me: “I also had over ten years in the military.”

Representative: “Well, I’ve made you an account on our system and put your information in there. Here’s a list of companies that are hiring, as well.”

Me: “Thanks!”

(Later that day, I logged in to the account, changed the password, and reviewed the “resumé” she’d made for me. Despite having my resumé to look at, [Factory] was misspelled, and the “summary” of my work experience said that I only had four years experience total, when my true work experience is closer to twenty years. I wasn’t expecting her to fill out everything for me, but it just felt odd, like she’d stopped listening after knowing about my factory work.)