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Uncovering Your Face Means Not Covering Your Tracks

, , , , , | Right | January 7, 2022

My store has a survey that customers can fill out on their receipt, with a one-to-ten scoring system. Everyone in the store gets punished if we get a score under eight because seven and below is considered a zero.

A customer comes up to the queue with her mask pulled under her chin and gets directly behind the other customer in line. It’s part of my job to enforce social distancing, and I ask her to step back and give the customer space.

Customer: “My God, is this the third f****** Reich?”

Me: “I’m just trying to make sure we stay open safely, ma’am.”

Customer: “The black b**** at the fabric counter was a Nazi; now you’re a f****** Nazi!”

Me: “There are children here, ma’am, so I need you to not shout.”

This includes her child in the cart. She has now arrived at my register, her mask still around her chin.

As I really don’t appreciate her comments, I decide to be as slightly antagonistic as store policy will permit. If I am confident that she’s leaving a negative survey, and a seven and a zero are the same thing, why bother trying to raise the score from zero up to four? I step as far back from the counter as I can.

Me: “Can you please pull up your mask?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “I can’t ring your items until you pull your mask up.”

Customer: “Get the manager.”

Me: “I’m the manager.”

She pulls it over her mouth. I scan her one item. The fabric counter employee — the black employee who she called a b**** — has given her a hefty discount.

Me: “Okay, with the 75% off that my coworker gave you, your $39.95 item comes out to $10.76 with tax.”

By sheer luck, the phone rings. There is a timer on the phone, and if it’s not picked up before the third ring, it counts as a negative survey. I have to turn around to answer the phone.

Me: “[Craft Store], please hold.”

I radio to my coworkers that whoever is able needs to pick up the hold. This is the standard operating procedure when there’s only one cashier. The entire process takes a few seconds. Before I can turn around, something small and hard hits my back. The customer has taken $10.76 cents out of her wallet, slammed the bills on the table, and thrown the coins at me. She storms out before I can put the money in the till.

Me: *Very cheerfully and loudly* “Have a nice day, ma’am!”

I put the money in the drawer and the next customer comes up as the receipt is printing. I’m genuinely smiling at this point.

Customer: “I’m impressed that you’re not upset by her.”

Me: “The only feedback that the store reads is the receipt survey. I have her receipt, so she can say whatever she wants on Yelp or Google Maps, and my store won’t care. But, when the next cashier comes in half an hour, I’m going to go find her face on the security cameras and send it to all our sister stores, so we can ban her from all the stores in our entire region. Normally, we couldn’t do this, but since she wouldn’t pull up her mask, we have a clear shot of her face. Would you like to buy a reusable bag for 99¢?”

Wait, Who’s Having The Cops Called On Them?

, , , | Right | CREDIT: sunny543 | January 4, 2022

I work at a large craft store and it was almost closing time. I was at a register waiting for stragglers to check out, and I had my back toward the exit, which is right behind the registers. There was nobody coming up, so I was looking around, and I noticed a woman walking quickly behind me toward the exit.

By the time I saw her, she was already turning toward the doors and walking into the foyer which leads to the outside entrance, and I only saw her back and a little of her side, enough that I noticed her arms were crossed over her chest like she was holding something against it. I didn’t think much of it and just yelled, “Have a good night!”

I guess she was so focused on getting out of the store that she didn’t notice me standing there, so when I spoke to her, she startled really badly and dropped what she was holding. It was a little vase that cost like ten dollars. So, immediately, I walked toward her out into the foyer. I don’t know why she stayed there; she could have just booked it and I wouldn’t have followed her.

Me: “Are you planning to pay for that vase?”

I said it kind of in a snarky way, but it was late, and I was too tired for this bull.

Woman: *Huffy* “Yes.”

I picked up the vase to bring it to my register and check her out.

I don’t know if that set her off or what, but she suddenly got PISSED and snatched the vase away from me.

Woman: “I paid for this! Stop putting your dirty paws being all over my property!”

I already knew what this was going turn into, so I went to the registers, picked up a phone, and paged for my manager. A couple of my coworkers came up to the registers.

Woman: “She tried to steal my property, she accused me of shoplifting, and she yelled at me!”

They all knew she was lying already because I’m a very quiet, shy person, and I’ve never raised my voice, let alone yelled at someone at work.

Woman: “Call the cops! She physically cornered me and I was afraid for my life!”

Now, this woman was five or six inches taller than me and bigger in general. There’s no way I could have intimidated her that much.

My coworkers and I just let her carry on until my manager got there, and it turned out that he had been suspicious of her earlier and had been checking the cameras. She tried to start her bullcrap on him about having me arrested and stuff.

Manager: “I already know you haven’t paid for anything. You need to leave and stop harassing my employees.”

Woman: “I’ll be calling corporate!”

Manager: “Go ahead.”

She stormed out after that.

The kicker of this whole thing was that she was wearing what seemed like expensive clothes and nice jewelry, and when we watched her leave, it was in a car that looked pretty new/expensive. And she was trying to steal and make a big fuss over a little ten-dollar vase?

She’s Knit Letting It Go

, , , , | Right | January 3, 2022

My coworker and I have finished most of our closing duties. We are just waiting for the last customer to finish up so we can go home for the night. We have checked in with her a few times and helped pick out some supplies for learning to knit. She finally comes up to the counter and pays before dropping this gem.

Customer: “So, you guys can teach me how to knit, right?”

My coworker grabs the class sign-up book and starts into our spiel on dates and teachers, but the lady interrupts.

Customer: “No, like, now. It isn’t busy and it’ll just take a minute.”

Me: “Umm, I’m sorry, but we have to close up and go home now.”

She looks disappointed, but we recommend some books and YouTube tutorials and suggest she come back for a class if she needs to. We finally get her out the door and turn off the lights, but she stands outside for a while before knocking on the door. When my soft-hearted but assertive coworker checks on her, she says:

Customer: “Are you sure neither of you could teach me right now? You are done with work!”

I didn’t hear what my coworker said to her, but the customer finally left, and we made our escape!

Untitled Goose Story

, , , , | Right | December 30, 2021

I am working at the customer service desk at a craft store when the phone rings.

Customer: “Hi, do you have any geese?”

Me: “Uh… geese?”

Customer: “Yeah, like a little goose to put on your desk?”

I figure she means a figurine or a plushie. It’s close to Easter, so maybe we have something in our seasonal section.

Me: “If you hold for a minute, I’ll go check for you.”

I look in our seasonal Easter section but don’t find much.

Me: “Ma’am, I found some duck plushies, but no geese.”

Customer: “Well, do the ducks look like geese?”

Me: *Utterly dumbfounded* “Umm… I’m sorry, but I’m not an expert on the differences between ducks and geese. You could come in and look at our selection to see if anything works for you?”

Customer: “Okay, thank you!”

The customer was polite and friendly the whole time. But really, who calls a craft store looking for geese?

Maybe Not The Best Man For The Job

, , , , | Right | December 26, 2021

I am working at the fabric counter in a craft store when a little old man wanders in, looking extremely lost and clutching a scrap of fabric for dear life.

Me: “Hello! Can I help you find something?”

Customer: *Very hesitantly holds out the fabric scrap* “My wife sent me to get more of this fabric.”

Me: “No problem! This looks like a cotton quilting fabric. Let’s go over to that section and see if we can find a match.”

I take the customer to the quilting fabrics section and start looking for a match. As I look, the customer stands nearby, still seeming confused. I finally find a fabric that’s a close match, but because of different dye batches, the colors are very slightly different.

Me: *Shows customer the fabric* “This one is almost the same as what you have. The colors aren’t quite an exact match, but very close. Do you think this will work for your wife?”

Customer: *Looks at me with a look of panic in his eyes* “I don’t know. I’m color-blind!”

I ended up sending him home with a sample of the new fabric to show his wife and told him that if his wife approved, he could come back and buy more.