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, , , | Right | September 23, 2021

I go to a small craft store inside a mall. A few minutes later, a woman comes in and tells her husband to stay outside of the store with their little kid — about five years old — because the store is too small for all of them.

I’m paying when the little kid runs inside the store and stops at the door to look around at the yarns, threads, buttons, and other things with big eyes.

Kid: *Very loudly* “Wow! This place is like Heaven for moms!”

We all had a very good laugh and agreed with him.

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Not Painting Himself In A Very Good Light

, , , | Right | CREDIT: sdrleckie | September 23, 2021

This happened about seven years ago. I used to work for a retail pharmacy as a pharmacy tech, so I wore slacks and blouses. Next door to my work was a large craft store chain. I am very artsy-craftsy, so when I had extra time before work, I liked to wander the craft store.

One day, I was busy looking at some paints when a guy came up to me and asked where a craft supply was. I was not wearing the uniform or even the color scheme of the uniform of the store.

Me: *Politely* “I don’t work here, and I don’t know.”

It wasn’t within my field of crafting so I had no idea.

He walked back down the aisle and then turned around sharply and pointed a finger at me aggressively.

Customer: “You don’t have to be so rude!”

I smiled at him and responded with a sugary-sweet voice.

Me: “You don’t have to be so stupid!”

That shut him up real quick and he walked away. Victory is sweet.

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Well, SOMEONE Is Gonna Learn A Lesson

, , , , , | Working | September 13, 2021

I am a new employee at the craft store where I am supposed to be a stock person. Like every company I’ve ever worked at, I have to read the “newbie” stuff that summarizes safety and company expectations. It is on a computer, so the manager sets it up for me and leaves me to read it.

I start on the first “lesson” and am treated to a massive page of information in small font, most of which looks like legal jargon on laws involving my range of authority.

Me: “[Manager], I think you gave me the wrong lesson.”

Manager: “I gave you the same lesson that everybody else is required to read, [My Name]. Just read it.”

Me: “No, I really think you gave me the wrong—”

Manager: “Stop arguing with me and read it! You have an hour, which is plenty of time!”

Me: “…”

I do my best, but I’m struggling. While I am proud to admit that I can read quite well, this massive pile of text is nothing short of legalese usually found in the small print explaining how a company is in no way responsible for your stereo opening a portal to an Eldritch plane of existence.

I fail to complete even the first “lesson,” get an earful from my manager, and then get chewed out AGAIN trying to explain that I really do seem to have the wrong lesson.

I am given a second hour the following week in an attempt to complete the lessons, and again I fail to complete even the first one.

Finally, the store manager pulls me into his office.

Store Manager: “[My Name], it really is ridiculous that you’re so far behind in your lessons. It shouldn’t even take you fifteen minutes to go through the first one. They’re not complicated, and you really need to read faster than that.”

Me: *Frustrated* “[Store Manager], I can read a Harry Potter book in less than a day. The lessons [Manager] gave me are nothing but complicated legalese and jargon.”

The store manager frowns and goes to bring up what I’ve been reading on my little online account and his jaw drops.

Store Manager: “This is what she gave you?!”

Me: “Yes.”

Store Manager: “These are definitely the wrong lessons! This is information that a store manager is required to know in order to avoid breaking the law while running the store! This takes months and several very expensive company classes to complete! Did you tell [Manager] that she gave you the wrong lesson?!”

Me: “Several times. She kept interrupting me and telling me to stop arguing and that my lesson was the same as everyone else’s.”

Store Manager: “I’m very sorry about this. Let me give you the actual lessons.”

The actual lessons involved a slide show about knowing where the fire extinguishers are and common-sense advice for things a regular employee would need to know about safety. I finished it in fifteen minutes.

This incident was just the first of many such encounters with [Manager] until I finally quit that job.

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Crafty Descriptions

, , , , | Right | September 13, 2021

An interesting thing about working at an arts and crafts store is learning how to decipher the odd ways in which customers explain what they are looking for. One day, a customer comes up to me and describes what she wants.

Customer: “Well, it’s hard on the outside, and squishy on the inside… and you can write on it.” 

Luckily, I knew what she was looking for: foam board!

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Specificity Is Not Their Craft

, , | Right | August 18, 2021

I work in a craft store. Our policy is to greet every customer we see. I’m working at the front of the store and a woman comes in.

Me: “Good morning. Is there anything I can help you with?”

Customer: “Yes, can you direct me to the craft department?”

Me: “Could you be a little more specific?”

She looks at me like I’M the idiot.

Customer: “General crafts.”

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