There’s Customers Over Here

, , , | Right | September 27, 2018

(I have five minutes left in my shift when a customer approaches me looking for some pens we have on sale. Luckily, I can scan to get directions right to them, so I figure I can show the customer and then finish cleaning up my stock after without risking going over my hours. Unfortunately, when we get there I see we’re sold out.)

Me: “I’m so sorry, but we must have sold the last ones today, and the system hasn’t caught up yet. We’ll get more in this week; do you need them now?”

Customer: “No, I just wanted to grab some fine-line pens for writing.”

Me: “Oh! Well, the sale ones were for drawing, so we actually have writing pens for that same price all the time. You can even test them there.”

(I show the customer the pens in the next aisle. I even walk him through each one, and answer some questions. I’m hitting the end of my shift, so I try to wrap it up.)

Me: “…and there’s pens up at the front that are roughly the same quality, but 50 cents cheaper. I need to head up there so I can show you.”

Customer: “Okay, it’s going to sound like I’m picking on you, but since you’ve been so helpful, I’m going to offer you some advice.”

Me: “Okay.”

Customer: “You know the verb ‘to be’ is dead; people don’t use it anymore. You said, ‘There’s,’ as a contraction, but since it’s a multiple, you should have said, ‘There are.’”

Me: “Oh. Okay?”

Customer: “You wouldn’t say, ‘There’s cars over there,’ right? It’s the same thing.”

(I realize he’s going to keep going, so I decide to just smile and nod.)

Customer: “You’ll notice it’s what they say on the news. It’s the more professional way to speak. My daughter says, ‘There are,’ and she works at the White House. It makes people judge you if they hear that. It’s like the n-word to educated people.”

(At that point my customer service smile becomes strained past believability, but I manage to keep quiet because I just want to go home. By the time he’s done, it’s five minutes after my shift should be over.)

Me: “Okay, thanks. I’ll remember that. Now, let me just show you those pens.”

(While we were walking he made a joke about being the worst customer. I didn’t laugh.)

They Either Complain There Are No Signs, Or Too Many

, , , , , | Right | September 21, 2018

(A couple comes up to the register with some jewelry-making supplies and I give them their total.)

Customer: “This was $1.74! It said that it was $1.74 over there!”

Me: “Okay, can you show me? Because if it was in the wrong spot, I can—”

Customer: “It wasn’t in the wrong spot! I even scanned it at one of the price checkers and it said $1.74!”

(She takes me over to the price checker.)

Customer: “As you can clearly see—”

(She scans the item. The screen on the price checker says $2.49.)

Customer: “That said $1.74 before! I swear to God, it said $1.74!”

Me: “Well, let’s go over to where you found it and see if there was a sign put up by mistake or something.”

(We go over to where she found the item. It is clearly marked $2.49, and there are no sale signs. She grudgingly accepts that she was wrong and goes back to the register. I give her the total, but she and her husband are not happy with it.)

Customer: “Why aren’t these all 50% off? There was a sign there that said 50% off!”

Customer’s Husband: “You can even see it from here! There’s a 50%-off sign!”

Me: “I’m pretty sure the sale is only on beads. I was just over there, and there was no sign in that panel. I can go over and show you if you want.”

Customer’s Husband: “How about this? How about we just don’t buy anything, and leave?”

Me: *pause* “Okay?”

Customer’s Husband: “This is unbelievable! You’ve got all these signs in that general area, so that should mean that everything there is 50% off!”

(My manager has been at the register next to me this whole time and overhears this.)

Manager: “Our signs are put up panel by panel, sir.”

Customer’s Husband: “DON’T GIVE ME THAT!”

(The two of them walked out without buying anything. I told them, quietly enough so that no one would hear, to have a terrible day.)


Unfiltered Story #119705

, , , | Unfiltered | September 8, 2018

(In between customers at work, I often times get bored and will sing along to the overhead music. On this particular occasion, a popular song that I know all the words to starts playing just as my manager walks past me)

Me: *singing* Shut up and dance with me!

Manager: No, I won’t dance with you, I have work to do.

(And that is why I love my manager.)

Bouncing Off Bad Parenting

, , , | Right | September 7, 2018

(I work in a craft store. We stock bouncy balls; kids and adults alike constantly bounce them, which is annoying and dangerous because we have glass. A mom and son are in our store. The son is bouncing a ball.)

Me: “Hey, please don’t bounce the ball in the store. We’ve got a lot of glass in here. Thanks!”

(The mom looks at me with this confused look but says nothing. Two minutes later, the mom comes up to me.)

Mom: “You know, I wasn’t going to let him bounce that around glass.”

Me: *thinking she was trying to explain why her kid was misbehaving* “Oh, no, it’s okay. Happens all the time.”

Mom: “Well, I had it under control.”

Me: “Really, it’s fine.”

Mom: *gets snarky* “I just thought it was really rude of you.”

Me: “Oh, um, I’m sorry?”

(The mom stomped off. Luckily, my manager heard the whole thing and took my side, but we were both clearly baffled by how a mom would let her kid misbehave, then get mad when someone else has to step in.)

Refunder Blunder, Part 40

, , , | Right | August 29, 2018

(I work as a cashier at a chain craft store. One day a woman comes in with a return of a single plastic dog figurine — which we do not carry at our location — without a barcode, and with a receipt that does not match at all.)

Me: “Ma’am, do you have another receipt? This one does not have the item on it, and the dog does not have a barcode for me to scan.”

Customer: “That is the receipt. I know it is.”

Me: “But none of the items on this are even close; you have ribbon and a book on this receipt. I really need the correct receipt. We do not even carry this item at this location, so I can’t even get a barcode to look it up.”


(My manager happens to be on the register next to me because we are pretty busy, and has heard the whole thing. She comes over and looks at the dirty, untagged dog, and at the receipt, and tells her the same thing I did.)


Manager: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I have no proof that you bought this here, and we do not even carry it at this location.”


Manager: “The item does not match any of the items on the receipt.”


Manager: “Then you should bring it back to them, and I’m sure they’ll take care of you.”

(She continues to insist loudly over and over that my manager has to take it back because she bought it at a different location of the same store. Turns out the store she bought it at is a whole five minutes away. My manager finally caves and manually refunds the book on the receipt, since it is a similar price. All the while, the woman continues shouting at her.)

Manager: “Here you go, ma’am. Have a nice day.”


Refunder Blunder, Part 39
Refunder Blunder, Part 38
Refunder Blunder, Part 37

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