(My family uses a video app that allows the users to send short videos to each other. My grandma, especially, loves using it, because it allows her to send videos whenever she thinks of us, and she can rewatch videos we’ve sent when she feels lonely. I am in my car in the parking lot of my local store, having just finished watching my grandma’s latest video. I am preparing to record my own response when my car jolts with a loud crunch. I glance out the back and see that another car came into the neighboring stall at too wide of an angle and hit my side. I get out and walk around, phone in hand, just in time to see them pull away and start speeding off down the row. I quickly hit the record button and turn my phone around to capture the video of their car and license plate, stepping out to keep it in view, so I can have a record when I contact the police. Evidently, the driver sees me, because they slam to a stop and then quickly reverse back down the row, swerving close enough to risk clipping the parked cars as they do so. They roll down the passenger window as they get to me.)

Driver: *shrieking at the top of her lungs* “I DO NOT CONSENT! I DO NOT CONSENT!”

Me: “I didn’t consent to you hitting my car, and you still did!”

Driver: “TURN THAT OFF! I DO NOT CONSENT!”

(She got out of her car just as my video hit the time limit, so I started another and kept recording as she tried to run around the car to grab my phone. I dodged around my car, and we circled a bit before I managed to jump into my driver’s seat and closed the door. I’d managed to get a shot of the damage to the side of my car as we were circling, and so I finished that video and started calling the police. The lady was banging on my door and pulling at the handle while I did so, and my grandma and my mom were both sending me texts asking what the heck the videos I’d just shared were about. Long story short, the lady sped off before the police got there, I was able to give my account, and we were able to figure out how I could share the video evidence with them. I managed to calm down both my mom and my grandma, but for weeks afterward, my grandma would end all of her videos reminding us to “watch out for loonies in cars.”)

(I have to schedule a flight. I use my bank’s travel website to book through, since the terms of use claim to include free cancelation. I pay and receive an email which includes my confirmation number and a copy of the same terms of use. Due to a miscommunication between me and the people I’m visiting, I scheduled the wrong dates and need to change the booking. It would be best to cancel, get refunded, and schedule a new flight, due to the price differences. I have called the bank’s travel support phone number, which is the only way to cancel bookings.)

Agent #1: “[Bank] Travel, how can I help you?”

Me: “I need to cancel my flight.”

(He collects the appropriate information from me and mentions the disclosure about the call being recorded.)

Agent #1: “Okay, I can cancel this. There is a cancelation fee of $25; is that okay?”

Me: “Actually, that’s not okay, because [Bank] says cancelations are free.”

Agent #1: “Well, I’m not [Bank], I’m [Bank] Travel. The charge is $25.”

Me: *mocking laugh* “No, it ain’t, and I won’t pay it. I have an email from [Bank] saying that cancelation is free, and I can see that on [Bank] Travel’s website, it also says cancelations are free. Get me your manager.”

Agent #1: *argumentative and fussy* “Well, my manager is going to say the same thing! Why don’t you just agree and save us all some time?”

Me: “If your manager can’t do it, then get me your manager’s manager. I’ve worked in a call center, my dude, and I know my rights as a consumer. [Bank] Travel advertised free cancelation. I am canceling my booking. I am entitled to you refunding me in full. Period.”

Agent #1: *angry growl and sigh* “Please hold.”

(As he’s, presumably, attempting to mute his microphone, he mumbles a sexist slur which translates to “female dog.”)

Me: *laughs out of surprise* “I heard that, and I know you can hear me, and I know your recording system heard it, too.”

(He hangs up on me, so I call back and get an agent who is a woman.)

Agent #2: “[Bank] Travel, how can I help you?”

Me: “Can your system locate a previous call’s recording from using the caller’s phone number as a reference?”

Agent #2: *understandably baffled* “Uh, yes, usually there is no problem with that.”

Me: “Please have your manager review the call recording prior to my call with you. I can wait as long as it takes without any hassle.”

Agent #2: “Uh, okay, this may take a few minutes. Excuse me for a moment while I place you on hold.”

(Roughly ten minutes pass.)

Agent #2: “Hello again. My manager reviewed the call and would like to speak to you about your—” *paused for a moment* “—experience. May I transfer you to her?”

Me: “Thanks so much. Please do.”

Manager: *nervous and confused* “Hello, [My Name]. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry about this situation. I have no idea why… why that happened. Everyone here knows there is no fee for your reservation method, and even if there had been fees on your account, the agents on the phone would never have any reason for making sure fees are billed to [Bank] customers. Not to mention, his behavior was unacceptable and I’m so sorry about this.”

Me: “I don’t need you to apologize to me. I appreciate it, but when a person is wrong they should directly apologize to the person they’ve wronged. On that note, I doubt that he would, so we can skip it. About my flight?”

Manager: “Cancelled with absolutely no charges or fees; a full refund will appear on [Bank] website within 24 hours.”

Me: “And about the first agent I spoke with… I’m sure [Bank] would want to reconsider a rep like him, right? I’d hate for him to verbally abuse someone who, say, is in a worse mental place.”

Manager: “He has been taken out of the call system for the moment, and is unable to take further calls today. He will not represent [Bank] in any position that faces customers, but any other punishments aren’t up to me. Please excuse me. Have a nice day.”

(The call was politely disconnected. I got a full refund and booked the cheaper flight without further drama. If it’s “female dog” behavior to make a company abide by the contracts they use, then I will gladly continue to be a female dog.)

At work, I miss a call on my cell phone, but the caller leaves a voicemail. The caller states they are from a counseling office and are returning my call about whether they accepted a certain insurance or not. I hadn’t called them so I initially brushed it off as a wrong number.

But then I get to thinking. I did previously have a policy with the insurance they mentioned but it was a while ago. I listen to the message again for the name of the office they were calling from and then I remember. I called this office and left a message to ask that question…

FOUR YEARS EARLIER. 

I can’t fathom how it took four years to return a phone call for a simple question and how they never realized how old the message I left was.

(I work at a pet boarding facility that is very popular, which means we fill up quickly, especially on weekends. We have five different sized kennels people can book: cages, cabins, large cabins, suites, and large suites. A client comes in with his three dogs: two rather large labs and a Jack Russel puppy. The following exchange takes place with my manager who is working the front desk.)

Client: “Hi, we have [Pets] here for boarding.”

Manager: “Perfect!” *looks up booking* “Okay, it looks like we have [Jack Russell] in a cage and [Labs] in a cabin.”

Client: “Yeah, we made that booking right after we got our puppy, but the female lab and the puppy have really bonded so we want them all together.”

Manager: “Oh, I’m sorry, sir, but our cabins are not big enough for three dogs.”

Client: “What?! That’s ridiculous; I want to see these cabins! I’m sure it will be fine.”

Manager: “We’d be happy to show you, sir.”

(She pages one of my coworkers working in the back to come give him a quick tour. Our cabins and our large cabins are in the same area.)

Client: *after the tour* “Yeah, I guess you’re right; they wouldn’t fit. I did see some bigger kennels, though, and they would all three fit in those for sure.”

Manager: “I can see if we have any openings.” *quickly looks through the computer, even though she knows we are full* “I’m sorry, sir, but all of our large ones are booked. You will have to keep the two different kennels, but we will make sure they get plenty of time together.”

Client: “Well, can’t you just move another dog into the smaller one and let us have the bigger one? Their owners would never know.”

Manager: *shocked expression* “Sir, we can’t change someone else’s booking. That would be unprofessional. Wouldn’t you be upset if we moved your dogs around for someone else?”

Client: “Yeah, but they’d never have to know! My dogs are only staying for a few days.” *they are staying over a week* “And how was I supposed to know they would all bond so well?”

(This went back and forth for a while before the client, reluctantly, agreed to his original booking. He just couldn’t understand why we wouldn’t move someone else so his dogs could be together even though he was the one who booked them separately.)

(I am working at the registers and mostly everyone in the store has radios on and have earpieces in. It is kind of a slow night when an older gentleman storms in, already looking aggravated. He storms up to one of the workers on the sales floor.)

Customer: “Hey! I need an Unlimited Power Supply; where are they at?!”

Worker: “I’m sorry, a what?”

Customer: “An Unlimited Power Supply! Where are they?! Are you stupid?!”

Worker: “I’m sorry, do you mean a UPS? An Uninterruptible Power Supply?”

Customer: “Never mind you. I’ll find someone who can actually help me.”

(I then just hear him storming around the store grumbling at people about his “Unlimited Power Supply.” One of the workers eventually takes him to the UPS area and that is what the customer was looking for. He then comes up to me to check out and the first worker that he yelled at says over the radio;)

Worker: “If we sell an unlimited power supply that literally works off perpetual motion, y’all better tell me where that s*** is, ‘cause I want one, too.”

(I burst out laughing right in front of the customer.)