(I’m sixteen and my sister is seven. I’m a natural brunette while my sister is a natural ginger. We’re with our mother, shopping. My mom is hearing impaired and also a ginger. While mom is looking at some products in the opposite end of the aisle, I take care of my own half of the shopping list.)

Woman: *playing with my sister’s hair* “Oh, aren’t you just the cutest thing?”

Me: “Ma’am, please don’t touch my sister without permission.”

Woman: “Oh, don’t worry dear; she doesn’t seem to mind. I don’t bite.”

(My sister is very shy and goes mute with people she doesn’t know. The woman is obviously not listening and Mom probably won’t hear me. Being the immature teen I am…)

Me: “Ma’am, she has a bad case of lice. Please stop touching her hair.”

(The woman goes pale and runs towards the bathrooms. My mom catches up with us, very confused.)

Mom: “Why was that woman running like she saw the devil?”

Me: “She wouldn’t stop playing with [Sister]’s hair, so I told her she has lice.”

Sister: “Yup.”

Mom: *laughing* “I had a similar thing happen when you were a toddler, [My Name], and I said the exact same thing.”

(My friends and I have stopped at the grocery store, because we are going to a movie and want some candy and other assortments for a cheaper price.)

Employee: “Hi! How’re you doing?”

Me: “Good.”

Employee: *checking out* “Do you have a value card?”

Friend & Me: “Our parents do, but we don’t know how to use them.”

Lady: *behind us in line* “I’ve got one. Can we try that?”

(The employee checks the card, and our price goes down by $5.)

Friend & Me: *in shock, says* “Wow! Thanks a ton!”

Lady: “Don’t worry about it; I’m always happy to help!” *smiles*

(These are the people in the world we need most!)

(I work maintenance in a supermarket. One of my responsibilities is taking care of any issues that the bottle return machines cause. The bell rings for me to go to the machines. Once out there:)

Me: “Sorry for the wait.”

Customer: “The plastic machine never printed out the ticket.”

Me: “Please let me see the tickets you have so far.”

(I take a look and see if anything matches up. As usual, his ticket matches perfectly to the last displayed amount, which is $0.70. After explaining this to the customer:)

Customer: “Oh, that’s from the can machine.”

Me: “I highly doubt that you had the same exact of cans that you did for the plastic machine, but let me see what I can do. If anything, you can go to customer service and see what they can do.”

Customer: “Now I’m getting cheated out of money!”

(After a little more searching about at the machines I find the serial number that most likely matched what’s on the ticket.)

Me: “Can I see the ticket one more time, please?”

Customer: “Here!”

(Taking another look, the numbers do match up. Having proof of what I suspected from the start, but not wanting to call him a thief or a liar, I hand him back the ticket.)

Me: “Taking another look I notice that the bar code for the plastic machine matches the ticket. It’s impossible that the ticket came from either of the can machines. Sorry for the confusion.”

(The customer didn’t really apologize, being caught in his lie. Luckily, I got to the people at customer service, the manager, and the other maintenance guy before the customer came in to let them know what happened so he couldn’t try to rip the store off. It was only a small amount of money, but if he tried it this time, he probably tried and succeeded in the past, as well, for other, possibly larger amounts. The best part was that the machine went down five times on him, but didn’t give anyone else any problems. I don’t know why the machine gave him trouble, but I’m guessing he tried something or other to try and cheat the counter of the machine.)

(I am ringing up a customer in his 50s. Because it’s a small store, and it’s midday, I enjoy making small talk with our customers.)

Me: “Your total comes to $19.75, sir.” *without saying dollar*

Customer: “1975, great! That was also a great year.”

Me: “Really? Was that the year you were born?”

(As I am in my late 20s and the customer in his 50s, I know this is impossible, but I am being friendly.)

Customer: “Nope. Even better; it’s the year I lost my virginity!”

(Stunned, not knowing what to say, I handed him his receipt. He just smiled and walked out of the store with his bags.)

(I am at the cashier to buy groceries, including a six pack. People under 18 are not allowed to sell alcohol. As the cashier sees the beer, he looks at me.)

Cashier: “I’ll need to call a manager over to ring this up since I can’t.”

(He calls for a manager on the phone, and then stands and stares at me.)

Me: “Um, how about you go ahead and ring the rest of my stuff up while we wait for the manager?”

Cashier: “But I can’t ring up your beer; I have to wait for him.”

Me: “But you could ring the rest of it up in the meantime, and then they could ring up the beer.”

Cashier: “I have to wait.”

Me: “But you don’t need them for the food, and this way you’d already have the rest of it rung up.”

Cashier: *looking very confused* “Why?”

Me: “Because it would save time for you, me, and the people in line behind me.”

(He looked at me suspiciously, then slowly began ringing up my groceries, eyeing me the whole time as though I was trying to pull a scam he didn’t quite understand. The other customers in line just shook their heads.)