One of my duties at the library is to call patrons with overdue items to let them know that said items are overdue. I do this once a week, and leave a lot of voicemails; I’m aware that some patrons recognize the number and let it go straight to voicemail, which doesn’t bother me at all. If anything, it helps me get through the list more quickly.

However, some patrons forget to let their household in on their plan, which I discovered today. I make a call which is answered by a child’s voice, breathless:

Child: “Yes hello?”

Me: “Hi, may I speak to [Patron]?”

Child: “Yeah, jusasec. MOOOOOMMM!”

Patron: *Distantly.* “Just hang up.”

Child: “MOOOOOOMMMMMM!”

Patron: “HANG UP!”

Child: “MMMMOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!”

Patron: “HANG. U–”

Steps, shuffling, click!

I took this to mean she got the message and crossed her off this week’s list. Hey, easily the most interesting call I made tonight!

I am helping a group design a banner for an event they’re hosting. I have changed the name of the event to protect the innocent, but the spelling comes out the same.

Client: “Can you make the letters for each word of the event big and bold, and maybe have them go vertical down the side?”

Me: “I really think you don’t want to do that.”

Client: “Why not?”

Me: “Your event name is Churches United: Northwest Territories.”

Client: “So?”

I oblige and show her what that will look like.

Client: “Oh. Oh! Yes… Maybe you were right before.”

My husband works at a greenhouse with multiple ranges. Every so often, workers from one range will finish early and go help a different range with a big harvest. Today, someone he’s never met has joined his range, and my husband is curious. My husband is white, and the coworker is wearing a small turban.

Husband: “So, where are you from?”

The coworker looks directly into my husband’s eyes.

Coworker: “…[Canadian Town]!”

Husband: *Pauses* “I meant, what range are you from? I haven’t met you before.”

Coworker: “Oh! Range 3.”

My husband hadn’t even considered that the guy likely got a lot of casual racism over his religion!

I’m working as a cashier at a grocery store. This happens before most stores in my province stop offering single-use plastic bags for a small upcharge. If a customer doesn’t have any reusable bags with them, we are expected to ask if they need any single-use ones.

This particular customer asks how much they cost. That’s nothing unusual; people ask me this all the time. I tell him they’re five cents. But then, he gives me an odd look.

Customer: “Do you know where that money goes?”

Me: *Suddenly very confused* “I, uh… I don’t really know, sir. I’m a cashier; I don’t exactly—”

Customer: “It’s going to those American capitalists.”

He starts rambling about “g**d*** American capitalism”. I feel like if I were to explain that not only are we in a Canadian grocery store, but it’s a locally-owned chain that’s only in our province and, as far as I can tell, has no affiliation with any of these “American capitalists”, so I just smile and nod.

When he finishes his rant, he gives me an expectant look, so I just shrug and mutter something like, “That’s just how it is; I don’t make the rules.” He seems satisfied with this and gives me a quick nod before leaving with his (unbagged) groceries. The customer behind him just stares after him before we both look at each other, equally baffled.

Customer #2: “‘American capitalists?”

Me: “Yeah, I have no clue, either.”

I work as a cashier at a grocery store that’s part of a small local chain. It’s not uncommon for people to eat food before they’ve paid for it, despite the very large, very noticeable sign reading, “FOOD PRODUCTS MUST BE PAID FOR BEFORE EATING”. Not only is it rude, but it also normally requires me to handle products that someone (normally someone’s kid) has put their mouth on. (It’s an older store, so only one of the tills has a handheld scanner. I’m normally not on that one.) As much as I’d love to give these people a piece of my mind — I’m a bit of a stickler when it comes to manners — I try to be as polite as possible. There’s no point in making a scene.

Most of the time, I get the same excuses. “I was just hungry,” “My kid was hungry,” “They’re just a kid; can’t you let it go?”, “[Other Nearby Grocery Store] lets me do this…” and so on, and so forth. For the most part, these people are unapologetic and dismissive but never try to argue with me. Except for one customer.

It was a fairly busy day (which isn’t saying much, since it’s a small store), and one of our few available cashiers that day was on break, so I had a bit of a line. Fortunately, everyone seemed to be buying only one or two items, so everything went quite smoothly. While the person I was currently helping was in the middle of paying for her items, the woman behind her, who looked to be in her sixties or seventies, opened the water bottle she had placed on the belt and took the tiniest sip I’d ever seen.

When I went to help her, I gave her my usual spiel, telling her that we didn’t allow customers to open products before paying for them. The woman interrupted me.

Woman: “I was just thirsty.”

It was almost my break, and I was a bit tired at this point, so I probably should have just shrugged and let this go. But, trying my best not to sound sarcastic, I asked:

Me: “So thirsty you couldn’t wait half a minute?”

The woman tried to tell me how she was so thirsty she’d started feeling faint and that she might have passed out if she hadn’t drunk the water. I’d like to remind you that she seemed in perfect health and that she drank barely any water. While I can’t say with 100% certainty that she wasn’t so dehydrated that another half-second without two drops of water would have caused her to pass out, I had a pretty good feeling she was just making an excuse.

Still, not wanting to press the situation further, I nodded and scanned her water bottle.

Suddenly, the woman exploded at me, ranting about how she was a cashier for years (she didn’t specify when or where), how she knew she was allowed to do this, and how I didn’t know what I was saying. I was so taken aback that I didn’t say anything. I just stared at her in shock before I handed her her water bottle and receipt and she stormed out.

All of this… over me asking her to pay for her water before drinking it.

I don’t understand some people.