Unfiltered Story #97667

, , | Unfiltered | October 11, 2017

(I work for a sizable company. It’s a name I can almost guarantee you have a product of in your house. I’m in accounts, billing, and technical support when I receive a call.)

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [Company] support, this is [Name] speaking. May I ask who I’m speaking with?”

Caller: “My name is [Name].”

Me: “Hello [Name], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Ah, yes, in December, I get refund, but I did not get refund.”

(I pull up her account.)

Me: “Well, I see here that your refund was processed on 12/29. It reflects as completed.”

Caller: “But I do not get refund.”

Me: “I see here that your refund went through paypal. Have you checked your paypal statement?”

Caller: “Yes, I no see refund.”

Me: “Alright, what I can do is transfer you to paypal.”

Caller: “But you do not give me refund. I need to talk to paypal?”

(I realize the customer is the type to be easily lost. I stay on the line while patching them through to paypal. The caller just sits there silently through the prompts, until I personally just start punching in her information for her.)

Agent: “Thank you for calling paypal, my name is [Name]; how can I help you today?”

(The caller sits silently for a few seconds until the agent repeats.)

Caller: “Oh, you want to talk to me?”

Agent: “…yes.”

Caller: “I did not get my refund.”

Agent: “…all right, is [information] your account?”

Caller: “Yes.” *addressing me* “Can you explain?”

(I briefly explain the situation.)

Agent: “Alright, well, looking at the date, it appears the refund was immediately processed to your account.”

Caller: “But I no see refund.”

Agent: “As per your statement, it was posted on 12/29. It appears that you purchased products from [website] and [website], spending off most of the balance.”

Caller: “But I no see refund.”

(I audibly face-palmed at this point.)

Agent: “…yes …ma’am. That would be because you spent it.”

Customer Interaction Isn’t Meant To Be With Each Other

, , , , | Working | October 9, 2017

(I’m at the office and our Internet is not working. I’m calling our ISP. After waiting for almost half-an-hour, I finally reach their service desk. After I explain the problem, the following conversation takes place.)

Support: “Okay, again, sorry about the long wait. Let me transfer you to the technical department; a tech will take it from there.”

Me: “All right, thanks.”

(I’m back on hold, but only for a moment.)

Other Person: “Hello?”

Me: “Hello, my name is [My Name]. We have no Internet at the office. The modem shows it has no DSL connection. The customer ID…”

Other Person: “Yes, it’s [other customer ID].”

Me: “Uhm… no… it’s [my customer ID].”

Other Person: “Huh? No, it’s not. I have it here on the invoice.”

Me: “What invoice?”

Other Person: “The invoice you sent me? Like the ones you send me every month?”

Me: “Wha… Wait… You’re a customer?”

Other Person: “Well, obviously? I called you about my Internet connection. You just repeated the issue back to me; now I’m expecting you to fix it.”

Me: “Hardly. I called because I’m having the same problem. And now they put me through to you. I guess he was really out of it.”

Other Person: “Oh, great. At least I have someone to talk to instead of that stupid recording that keeps telling me how important my call is to them. So, what do we do now?”

Me: “I guess we’ll have to call again.”

(And so we did. This time I didn’t wait as long, and they actually got it fixed within an hour or so. Hope they could also help the other guy.)

The Server Isn’t The Only Thing That’s Down

, , , , , | Working | October 5, 2017

(I have an onsite computer repair business. To take payments, I have a POS terminal that plugs into my laptop and integrates very nicely with my accounting software, so I don’t have to input any payments afterwards. Unlike other solutions, it also accepts Canadian debit cards. At my last call of the day, the terminal does not even turn on when I plug it in. Fortunately, it is a smaller job, so my regular client just pays me cash. After I return to my home office, I do some basic troubleshooting, and then call tech support. The actual call goes in circles for about 45 minutes; this is the summary version:)

Me: “My terminal is not turning on; I can’t take payments with it. I’ve tried multiple USB ports on three different computers. All have been able to use it before, but it doesn’t even turn on at all.”

Support: “My apologies, sir, but our server is down; that’s why payments aren’t going through.”

Me: “Thank you for that, but my terminal isn’t even turning on. Normally, when I plug it in, it lights up and shows a bunch of letters and numbers on it before it gets to the ‘Ready’ prompt.”

Support: “The server is down, sir. It should be back up in a few hours.”

Me: “This is not a server issue. When I plug it in, it always lights up, even if I haven’t connected the laptop to an Internet connection yet. I often use my phone’s hotspot when I can’t connect to the client’s connection, and it still normally lights up even if it can’t connect yet. This is NOT a server issue.”

Support: “Our server is down, sir. You cannot take payments right now.”

Me: “That’s fine. You still need to send me a new terminal. My computer does not even see that the hardware is connected. It does not show up in the device manager. If I plug it into a computer that has never used it, it does not ask to install drivers. [Accounting Software] does not see that the terminal is even there. All of this happens before it even thinks about contacting your server. It only contacts your server when it’s time to do a transaction, and that should lead to an ‘Unable to complete transaction’ error. Send me a new terminal.”

Support: “Correct, sir. The server is down; that’s why you are getting that ‘Unable to complete transaction’ error.”

Me: “I am not getting that error message.”

Support: “Then why did you mention it? What error are you getting?”

Me: “I’m not getting any error message. The terminal does not even turn on.”

Support: “I cannot help you if you cannot keep your story straight. Goodbye.”

(The phone line goes dead.)

Me: *dials back* “Give me someone who can authorize an RMA; your techs are useless. I just spent 45 minutes being told your server is down when I told them my terminal doesn’t even turn on.”

Support #2: “One moment, sir.” *call transferred*

Support #3: “How can I help you?”

(I explain once again.)

Support #3: “I apologize for the inconvenience this has caused you and your business. Can I get the serial number for the terminal? It starts with 37, and you can find it just below the barcode on the back of the terminal.”

Me: “37*********.”

Support #3: “Thank you, sir. I’m expediting a new terminal to you. It should arrive in two days.”

(Total time after the call back? Five minutes, including the brief hold for the transfer. I got the replacement device on the day they promised, and it continued to work perfectly until I closed the business three years later.)

Weathering The Customer Storm

, , , | Right | October 5, 2017

(It is springtime, and it has been raining for a month. At eight am this Saturday morning, the sun comes blazing forth!  The news server has crashed and indexes have to be rebuilt, so it’s down for a while.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [ISP]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I’ve been trying since six am to get my newsgroups, and nothing is happening!”

Me: “Are you nuts?”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “It’s been raining for weeks. It’s nine am on a Saturday, and it’s warm and sunny out. What are you doing inside?”

Customer: “Holy cow, you’re right!” *click*

Coworker: “How the h*** do you do that?”

Losing A Few Files In His Brain, Too

, , , | Right | October 4, 2017

(I work with support tickets on game servers. Clients send in questions and requests, and then we do our best to work with them.)

Client: “Help! My server is broken!”

(I look in the console and see no errors.)

Me: “I’m terribly sorry, but I don’t see any errors in your console. Could you please be more specific as to what is broken or not working?”

Client: “Put my ticket on hold; I think I got this.”

(I do as he wants, and go back to my work. I note that he replies a few minutes later, so I open his ticket.)


(Stunned, I check, and sure as can be, everything is gone, including core files. I ask him if he had a backup. He answers no, so I get the core files on his server to start it up fresh.)

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that you lost your files, but I’ve loaded the core files so your server can start up again. Unfortunately, all plugin data, map data, and other related data is gone.”

Client: “That’s stupid.”

Me: “I’m very sorry for this. We recommend backing up regularly. Additionally, please refrain from modifying or deleting server files if you’re not sure what you’re doing; it makes it easier for everyone, and minimizes damage risk.”

Client: “So, you’re saying this is my fault?”

Me: “I’m not trying to point fingers. Sorry if it sounded like that. However, it says in our Terms of Service—” *I link him to it* “—that we are not held responsible for situations in which the client modifies or deletes files of his free will.”

Client: “That’s f****** stupid.”

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