(The movie theater where I work has annual buckets that are $20 when you first buy them, but then you can bring it back and refill it for $4. I’m working in concession when a man and his 12-year-old son walk up to me.)

Customer: “I forgot my bucket at home!”

(I shrug this off because a lot of people forget their bucket.)

Me: “Okay… What can I help you with today?”

Customer: “I want two tickets to [Movie].”

Me: “Okay! Any concessions? Drinks? Popcorn?”

Customer: “I forgot my bucket at home.”

Me: “Okay…?”

Customer: *gesturing to the stack of buckets I have next to me* “So can I…?”

Me: “I’m sorry… what?”

Customer: “I forgot my bucket; don’t you trust me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I cannot GIVE you a bucket.”

Customer: “But I forgot my bucket!”

(I work in a movie theater. Like most theaters, evening showings are more expensive than matinee showings. I have a woman come up wanting to exchange her matinee tickets for evening tickets.)

Me: *after putting the transaction in the computer* “All right, that will be four dollars.”

Woman: “That’s ridiculous! I already paid for these tickets! I don’t owe anything!”

Me: “I understand you already paid for them, but since evening tickets are more expensive than a matinee, you owe the difference in price.”

Woman: “I told you! I already paid for these tickets! I don’t owe anything!”

(I tried several more times to explain why she owed more money, but she was not having it. I finally had to call my manager, who gave me permission to give her two child tickets, which are the same price as a matinee.)

(I’ve just graduated and have been accepted for a new job with my degree. I’m just completing the last few weeks of my job as a supervisor at a cinema complex. This customer has been screaming at me at the desk for me the last five minutes, over the fact that I will not let his thirteen-year-old into a rated R16 movie, and that we dared to ask for the kid’s ID.)

Me: “Sir, it’s a legal restriction. We cannot allow anyone under the age of 16 into this film, and to be certain we meet that obligation, we have to check anyone who looks under 25 for ID.”

Customer: “Well, he plays video games that are R18 and R16 all the time! I’m his father, and I say he’s allowed to!”

(I just want to yell at him that he’s breaking the law by doing that, anyway.)

Me: “It doesn’t work that way. We are legally obligated to check.”

(I provide him with paperwork from our online website stating our terms and conditions regarding this. It’s even highlighted… in bright yellow)

Me: “See? Here are our conditions—”

Customer: *not reading it* “I said I’m his father, and I allow him. What right do you have over that?”

Me: “The New Zealand law?”

Customer: *going on a rant I don’t really take notice of* “…by some stupid dropout at a cinema.”

(I remind him of the law and obligations, and agree to fetch the manager for him.)

Me: “…also, not a dropout. I’m a college graduate about to work with rehabilitation of traumatic brain injury. I’ll just go get my manager for you, sir!”

(For the record, my new clients with severe brain injuries have better sense than this guy did.)

(It is my job to clean theaters after shows, and to do it quickly before the next show. When a big movie comes out, it is not unusual for those theaters to be trashed, so I always bring an extra garbage can. I am waiting in a theater for the guests to empty out when a middle-aged woman walks up to me. I am standing near the trash can, holding my broom and large dustpan.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, ma’am?”

Woman: *bends down and jams her garbage in to my dustpan*

Me: *stares*

Woman: *stands up, laughs hysterically, and leaves without saying a word*

(I’m a ticket-taker in a major metropolitan movie theatre. It’s the opening weekend of a big superhero movie and it is incredibly busy. Our escalator is currently broken, but we offer guests our elevator. A woman refuses this offer, as she claims she can walk up stairs. I rip her ticket and then I hear a loud alarm.)

Woman: “WHY WON’T THE ESCALATOR WORK?!”

(She proceeds to keep hitting the emergency stop button, setting off the buzzer alarm.)

Me: “Ma’am, the escalator is broken and cannot be turned on. If you would like, the elevator is just across the lobby.”

Woman: “I WILL NOT BE TREATED LIKE A CHILD! MAKE THE MOVING STAIRS WORK!”

(I tell her to calm down and that our elevator is across the lobby. She decides that flapping her arms like a bird will make the escalator work.)

Woman: “MAKE THEM WORK! MAKE THEM WORK!”

(Her flapping motion eventually causes another guest to get seriously hurt and we have to call security. She refuses to move, and the police need to be called.)

Me: *to another guest after the woman is removed* “I apologize, sir. I didn’t realize we were doing a live performance of The Birds tonight.”

Guest: “Oh, that’s fine. I couldn’t get tickets to [Superhero Movie], so it made my night!”