Our customer toilets are out of order. We are waiting for a plumber to show up, and until then, there are big yellow barriers in front of the doors and signs everywhere (including all entrances and the bottom of all stairs leading up to the toilet floor).

Despite this, people still go there, find they are closed, and then complain to the nearest staff member they can find, which is usually someone from Menswear, given the location of the toilets.

I am chatting with a colleague from Menswear whilst on my break and she tells me about some of the customers she’s had to deal with. She caught [Customer #1] trying to break down the barrier in front of the toilet doors.

Colleague: “Madam, those toilets are out of order! You can’t go in there!”

Customer #1: “Oh, I didn’t realise.”

Later:

Customer #2: “How dare you close your toilets?!”

Colleague: “I’m sorry, madam, they are broken, but we—”

Customer #2: “It’s illegal for your toilets to be broken!”

And yet later still:

Customer #3: “We’ve come all the way upstairs to use the toilet and it is closed? Why didn’t anyone warn us?”

Colleague: “We do have signs at each entrance and at the stairs.”

Customer #3: “No one reads signs! You should have someone telling everyone who comes in!”

After my break, I head back downstairs. The way to the shop floor involves going past the customer toilets. As I walk past, [Customer #4] almost grabs me, pointing at the “Do Not Enter” barrier.

Customer #4: “WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

We are counting down the seconds until the plumber arrives.

I am working the returns desk at a large chain retailer when a woman comes up and drops three different foundations — all different shades and brands, none under $15 — at the register.

Me: “Hi there. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I need my money back.”

Me: “Okay, I just need your receipt, and I—”

Customer: “I don’t have it.”

Me: “No problem. I can look it up. When—”

Customer: “It was another location.”

Me: “I can still search for it.”

Customer: “I don’t remember when.”

How convenient that she lost the receipt and there is absolutely no way to look it up.

Me: “I’m sorry, but without the receipt, I can’t return these.”

Customer: *With an attitude* “Well, you’d better find a way, or I’m putting your a** all over the Internet.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I—”

She takes out her phone and starts recording me.

Customer: “Tell me again why I can’t return this makeup I paid for at [Store]?”

Me: “Per policy, there’s nothing I can do without your receipt.”

We stare at each other for a few seconds.

Customer: “Well… Well, what if I’m allergic?”

Me: “Are you?”

Customer: “What if I am?”

Me: “These bottles—”

Customer: “Yeah, I’m allergic! Every one of these makeups gave me a rash!”

Me: “You tried these exact foundation bottles? This one right here?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “This one with a factory seal?”

The woman put the phone down, snatched the foundation from my hand, and threw it. It shattered on the wall behind me, and she stormed out.

I told my manager, but since the woman never gave me an ID, there was very little they could do.

I’ve recently injured my foot, requiring me to wear a boot-style cast for several weeks. My partner and I decide to go shopping at a popular retail store, and I sit down to use one of their motorized carts. As we go past the return counter, a cashier calls out to us.

Cashier: “Excuse me, ma’am! That cart is only for the disabled!”

Me: “Oh, it’s okay. I have an injured foot!”

I point to my boot cast.

Cashier: “No, like, the actually disabled. You need to put that cart back.”

Me: “…and I’m actually disabled, just temporarily.”

Partner: “She needs to use the cart. There’re more back at the entrance.”

I go to drive away, and the cashier follows us. She calls for a manager over the radio.

Me: “Is she really doing this?!”

I continue shopping. A manager comes over, speaking to the employee before approaching us.

Manager: “My cashier tells me you’re using the cart without having a disability?”

Me: “No, I have a boot cast on. She’s saying that doesn’t count.”

The manager sees the obvious cast and turns back to the cashier.

Manager: “Really? Go back to your register.”

The manager ended up apologizing. When we left, the same cashier glared at us. Sorry, temporary disabilities count, too!

I work in customer service. I’m on a call with an irate woman who keeps on connecting causes and effects that have nothing to do with each other. I listen and make the known listening sounds (uh-huh, ah, yes…), but I get no space to say something in return.

Suddenly, the connection drops. I just know this lady will claim I hung up on her on purpose, but luckily, I have her phone number. I call her back.

Woman: “Eh… hello?”

Me: “Hello, you are speaking with [My Name] from [Company]. We got disconnected, so I figured I would call you back.”

Woman: “We didn’t get disconnected! I was just talking! Why are you interrupting me? Why are you so rude?”

I am working at a hotel chain with “Inn” in the name. It is a sold-out weekend, and a guy shows up to check in. I type in his name.

Me: “I’m not finding a reservation under that name.”

The guy immediately gets pissy.

Guest: “How hard is it to look up a name?!’

He then starts spelling it out really slowly and loudly, in a very condescending way.

Me: “There is still nothing by that name — nothing even close. Do you have a confirmation number? Sometimes names get typed in incorrectly.”

Guest: “I probably have it in an email, but I don’t feel like going through all that. Just make me a new reservation.”

Me: “I can’t do that because we’re sold out.”

He pulls out his phone to look up the email, the whole time going on and on about how stupid people are nowadays, asking how hard it can be to find a f****** reservation, yadda, yadda, yadda.

He finally pulls up the email.

Guest: “Here!”

He shoves the phone in my face. I look at it for about half a second.

Me: “This is for the [Hotel #2] Inn. You’re standing in a [Hotel #1] Inn.”

He just turned around and walked out without another word, but the look on his face right before he left made me feel sweet, sweet victory.