Our store usually puts up our sale tags the night before a sale to keep us from staying late or having to come in early the next day and ruining payroll. This often causes some confusion at the register, but we always fix to the advertised price, even a day early. We also know full well what products are on sale and what their prices are. We’re preparing for our end-of-summer sale, which includes 10% off many of our higher-end brands of dog food, but none of them are anywhere near $100. A customer comes up to the till.

Me: “That’ll be [price].”

Customer: “What did [Expensive Food] ring up as?”

Me: “It rang up as originally being [price], but took [amount] off for this cycle’s sale.”

Customer: “The tag said [price $10 lower].”

Me: “Okay, let me check the price list.”

Customer: “It must for the sale you’ve got. You have to give it to me at that price.”

Me: “I understand that, but I need to check on the price. We have a list of the upcoming prices up here.”

After looking, I see that, while the product IS going to be on sale, the price difference is nowhere near the $10 and, in fact, the price from the current sale cycle is lower than that of the following cycle. I explain this to the customer, but he only insists further. I see the manager walk by and ask her what to do. In order to get the guy to shut up, she allows me to change the price to $6 below the original non-sale price, with the $4 from the current sale still being taken off.

Me: “Okay, that’ll now be [new price].”

Customer: *looking smug* “That’s better.”

The customer pays and starts on his way but looks at the receipt and sees what he feels to be an issue. To be fair, our receipts have a weird way of printing sales and discounts at the bottom of the receipt, rather than paired with the item itself, but they have the item number tagged along with the discount amount.

Customer: “This still isn’t right.”

I know exactly what the issue is.

Me: “Okay, let me take a look at it.”

Customer: “See? You charged me [price adjusted for discount]; it should be [lower price].”

Me: “Well, yes, I understand that, but it took that discount off down here; it shows at this black bar.”

Customer: “Well, I still don’t see how that changes anything.”

Me: “Okay, you bought [Food] originally at [price], which we marked down to [lower price], and then you bought [clearance item] at [price], which totals [amount]. Add in the tax, and you get [ total].”

Customer: *Cutting me off* “See?”

Me: *continuing* “And then we took the remainder of the cost from [Food] here at this black bar.”

The customer then just grabbed the receipt and walked off grumbling that it “still doesn’t make any sense.”

Years ago, my grandfather owned a number of convenience stores. He hired and fired all kinds of crazy cashiers; the ones that stuck around for years might have been the craziest, but they were reliable. Every summer for years, I would be one of those cashiers; from the ages of fourteen to twenty, there I was every summer. 

Since he usually had regular turnover, it wasn’t hard for him to find me a shift to work, but one year he was fully staffed; he was just miffed by one employee. 

This one girl was great at all the assignments — stocking, cleaning, maintenance — but my grandfather noticed that he was going through a lot of rolls of dimes and pennies, and usually on her shifts. So, he decided to sort of watch her one day. It wasn’t until someone was owed $0.97 in change that he put it together.

Sure enough, this cashier gave the guy nine dimes and seven pennies as change. 

He tried to teach her, but it didn’t stick. 

Needless to say, he still found an opening for me that summer.

Our store used to price-match pretty much every other price out there — online retailers and third-party sellers not included. Then, corporate completely changed that practice, restricting our matching policy to stores within ten miles with proof of price such as a receipt, an ad, or the website.

Some customers — usually the elderly or those who don’t have smartphones — ask cashiers to look up prices, but corporate said that takes up too much time so they stopped that, as well.

Another associate asked if we could hang signs at the registers, but that idea was vetoed because it seemed “too aggressive.” To top it all off, when customers get upset, we can only tell them “it’s policy” and apologize for the inconvenience.

I’m on register, scanning away and making small talk with a woman, when one of her items comes up. She is already on her phone.

Customer: “Could you price-match that for me?”

I am thinking she has a price on her phone.

Me: “Sure, which store and how much?”

Customer: “Umm, you tell me.”

Me: “Ah. I’m sorry, it’s—”

Customer: *Suddenly angry* “You don’t price-match anymore?”

Me: “We do! It’s just that I can’t look them up for you anymore.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Corporate policy change. We do apologize for the inconvenience during this time of transition.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. You’re so lazy!”

Me: “I’m just doing my job, ma’am.”

Customer: “Let’s see if you still have a job after I talk to your manager.”

Me: “Ma’am, I—”

Customer: “Call her, you idiot!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

I call the manager over the loudspeaker, who calls back on the register phone.

Manager: “I’m on the forklift. What’s up?”

Me: “I have a customer who would like to speak to you about the price-matching policy changes.”

Manager: *Sighs* “Just… just do it. Explain you’re making an exception this one time. I gotta go.” *Hangs up*

Customer: “Well? Where is she?”

Me: “She’s currently on a forklift. I have her permission to—”

Customer: “I want to talk to her, not you. Do you understand?”

Me: “I do but she’s tied up right now. She said I can make an exception this time and—”

Customer: “And do your job?”

Me: *Through my teeth* “—and look this up for you, but it’s technically not allowed anymore.”

Customer: *Sarcastic* “I didn’t realize you needed special permission to do your job. Gosh!”

Me: “Would you like me to look this up for you?”

Customer: “Forget it! You’re wasting my time!”

After all that fuss, the woman stormed out without buying a single thing. She did, however, call and email corporate several times over the next few days to express her disdain for my attitude and how lazy and disrespectful I was. She got a gift card for her troubles, and I got pulled into the office to discuss my customer service skills. I quit not long after.

I am ringing up a customer and her husband. Our chain’s rewards card gives customers the sale prices and points they can redeem like cash on purchases.

Me: “Are you a rewards card member, ma’am?”

Wife: *Makes a face* “No.”

Husband: “I am!”

He fishes our blue card from his pocket.

Wife: “Why do you have that?!”

The wife turns back to me. I am a little confused.

Wife: “I work for [Competitor]. We’re from Florida.”

Me: “Oh!” *Laughing* “Well, there are three of [My Chain] and just one [Competitor] in our city.”

I gave them directions to “her” chain, describing how close it was to the newest location of my chain; they left while discussing the closeness of the two chains’ stores to each other across the country.

I work at a grocery store, and while most of my coworkers are good, some are less bright. After work, I go back in to pick up some food. I walk up to a cashier I know really well.

Cashier: “That’ll be €4,20.”

I hand her €5,20.

Cashier: *Confused* “What am I supposed to do with this?”

Me: “It’s easier. That way I’ll have less change in my wallet.”

Cashier: “No, this is way too difficult.”

She tries to hand me €0,20.

Me: “No, just punch it in and it’ll show you the correct change.”

Cashier: “I don’t know how!”

She’s worked here for at least a month now, and typing in change is one of the first things you’re taught.

Me: “Just type in 520 and press ‘cash.’”

Cashier: *Does so* “Okay, your change is… Wow! €1! How did you know?”

Sometimes, I question humanity.