(When I’m in eighth grade, my school gets a new teacher, an inexperienced 22-year-old fresh out of college. Since this is a small school, students are grouped by homeroom and he has to teach several different classes, mostly for his homeroom but for other homerooms, as well. One day, he takes us outside for the gym period and gives us free-reign as long as we don’t stray too far. We’re all having fun in our various activities and don’t notice the time passing. Suddenly, the science teacher, who is in charge of one of the seventh-grade classes, storms out of the building and comes up to our teacher.)

Science Teacher: “What are you doing out here?!”

Homeroom Teacher: “Gym class? Why?”

Science Teacher: *yelling* “You’re is supposed to be in the gym! The assembly starts in ten minutes!”

(Most of us heard and came running so we wouldn’t be late. I don’t think we even had time to change out of our gym clothes. The worst part? All of the students from the nearby elementary feeder school had already been bused over and seated, so our entire class plus our teacher had to climb over a bunch of younger kids to get to our assigned spot at the top of the bleachers!)

We have a small tablet on a stand that visitors use to sign in and out at our facility. This system is currently down, so I have people signing in and out on paper in a binder. I have a bright yellow post-it note in the middle of the tablet, saying, “Out of Order. Please use the book to your right.” Simple, right?

Every fifth visitor of the day begins to sign in on the tablet, completely ignoring the note, and acts completely dumbfounded when I point it out.

So, just before I leave for the day, I make a bigger sign that covers the whole screen of the tablet and tape it over the screen.

What do I see when I’m walking out the door? Someone tearing off the paper and attempting to sign in while my coworker looks at me and I look at him and we both do a simultaneous inner facepalm.

I just don’t know where some people misplace their brains.

(I work at an assisted living facility. We have a sign-in computer at the front desk. A man comes in to visit. We go through the normal pleasantries, although he is a bit short with me.)

Visitor: “Ugh, I can’t get this to work. And there’s a typographical error here.”

Me: *walks around desk* “Here, let’s see if I can help.” *starts helping him with the computer*

Visitor: “You probably don’t care what the error is.”

Me: “Of course I do!”

(I really don’t.)

Visitor: *goes back to the starting screen when we are almost done signing him in* “Here, it’s this. ‘Sign-In’ is an adjective. It shouldn’t have that dash there. Same with ‘Sign-Out.’”

Me: “Oh, okay. I’ll email the company about that.”

(No, I won’t.)

Visitor: *tries signing in again* “You know what? No. I’m not doing this. I’ll skip visiting her. I’ll come back when you have the paper sign-in again.”

Me: “Umm… okay…”

(He walks out the door.)

Me: “That’ll be never, then.”

(I felt sorry for the poor lady he was going to visit. But seriously? Buddy, this whole world is going toward tech solutions. You’re not going to see that paper sign-in any time soon, probably anywhere. Good lord, just suck it up and use the bloody computer!)

(I am working with a group of kids that I have only worked with once before. I get stuck in the room with a new employee and twelve three-year-olds. Towards the end of an extremely hectic day I need to use the restroom.)

Me: *to coworker* “Hey, I’m going to go use the restroom really quick. Will you be okay while I’m gone?”

Coworker: “Yeah! Go right ahead.”

(Not even five minutes later, I walk back into the room. The room has been torn apart completely, but that’s not the worst thing I see. One of the three-year-old boys is sitting in a chair without pants on.)

Me: “Hey, [Three-Year-Old], what are you doing?”

Three-Year-Old: “I peed!”

Me: “Oh, yeah? Where did you pee?”

(The child points to a puddle of pee in the middle of the room; his clothes are sitting in the middle of it.)

Me: “Um, [Coworker], did you notice that [Three-Year-Old] is naked and has peed on the floor?”

(My coworker obviously has been sitting in the corner with one child on her lap, ignoring the eleven other children in the room.)

Coworker: “What happened?”

(Let’s just say that I hope I never work with her again!)

(I’m just about finished with another day at work, with less than an hour to go, and I’m marveling to myself about the lack of stupidity today. I say goodbye to a visitor and she walks towards the doors.)

Visitor: *stands in front of the door, face inches from the glass*

Me: *blinks, watching her, at least ten seconds pass*

Visitor: *looks back over her shoulder at me, confused look on her face*

Me: “It’s… open?” *head-tilt*

Visitor: “Oh…” *very carefully pushes on the door and edges through it to get out* 

(She wasn’t a new visitor. The doors have never been automatic. I think… her brain just shut off for a moment. Seriously, though, never think that you haven’t seen many stupid people that day, because the universe will send you a reminder.)