My township has a contract with a trash collection agency. At $55 a month, it’s a little pricey, but they provide massive totes and as the other option is to figure it out ourselves, most people in town have signed up.

Our recycling is sitting out on the edge of the road on collection day. It actually never moves because I live on the outskirts of town and don’t have to move it. The day after, I notice that it is still full. I reach out to the company in an email.

Me: “Hello. I see that our recycling was not picked up this week. Could someone confirm that it is a weekly pickup?”

Company: “You have to have your tote on the curb the night before or it will not be picked up.”

Me: “Hello, thank you for your reply. My tote was in the correct place, as it never moves. Furthermore, I checked my doorbell camera and confirmed with my neighbors that the recycling pickup was not done on our street. Please confirm the pickup schedule.”

Company: “If your recycling is in bags, it will not be picked up regardless of whether or not it is in the correct place. We will not be sending a truck out for pickup until next week. Please be mindful of the rules you agreed to when signing up for our service.”

Before, I was confused. Now I’m mad. They have avoided confirming that they missed pickup and they’re trying to blame it on me!

Me: “Instructions to bag recycling are written on top of the tote. Why would I allow newspapers and the like to flow freely when the tote is dumped? You have yet to confirm that yesterday was a pickup day. Was it or was it not?”

They don’t answer. The next day, I am awoken by a banging on my door at 4:00 am. I see the recycling truck sitting in my yard — not on the road but actually in the grass where they have no reason to be. I speak through my video doorbell. The man seems surprised that I am talking but not there. I guess he didn’t see the very common doorbell camera right beside the door?

Me: “Yes?”

Man: “We’re taking your cans. Good luck getting rid of your s*** now!”

Me: “You weren’t picking it up anyway so it makes no difference to me. But I will be suing you for the property damage your big-a** truck is doing to my yard.”

Man: “Whatever, b****. You don’t want us to pick up your garbage, just say so. You don’t have to try to pick a fight on the Internet like some r****d.”

Me: “Uhh… you’re aware this is being recorded, right? Like… all of this.”

The man turned and walked away. He dragged both the garbage and recycling tote across the lawn and the truck picked them up. I posted the interaction on our township Facebook page. Several people came forward saying they’d had similar interactions, but not all had the video to prove it. The company’s professional Facebook page was flooded with one-star reviews until it was taken down.

A few weeks later, the contract with the trash company had been terminated for failure to fulfill services and we switched to another company that did the same thing — but, you know, actually did the job — for $40 a month.

I’m a female living alone. It’s a cold December afternoon when my doorbell rings. I open the door and there is an older man standing there.

Man: “Hi! I’m going to come in because it’s cold out. You don’t mind, do you?”

I can just make out the logo on his jacket from the service company that my housing association usually employs, which tells me he is not some random idiot just willy-nilly inviting himself into my house, but still, I am quite stunned by the audacity. I can barely get an “Ummmm?” out when he’s suddenly standing in my hallway and closing the door behind him. 

Man: “Right. So, if all is in order, you had a letter sent to you informing you that you can apply for a survey of your apartment to make it more energy efficient, correct?” 

Me: “Yes, I received that letter. What about it?”

Man: “Have you made an appointment for that yet? I’m just going door-to-door to make sure people get their appointments in. It’s important, you know!” 

Me: “I’m sorry, I haven’t had the time yet.”

Man: “Ha! Didn’t have the time to pick up the phone and book an appointment? It takes less than a minute!”

Me: “It wasn’t really a priority for me at the moment…”

Man: “How can it not be a priority? There is an energy crisis going on, and I’m sure you are eager to see where you can save money. I’m not leaving until you promise me to book that appointment.”

He smiles as if it’s supposed to come across endearingly. I’m still too stunned to form a proper response, and honestly, I’m quite intimidated. I just want him out of my hair, and I’m trying to be polite about it. (Why I am still polite I have no idea… Self-protection, I guess.) 

Me: “I will book that appointment as soon as possible, then. I’m sorry, I just haven’t gotten around to it.”

Man: “No. You were just lazy about it.”

For those who speak Dutch, he used the word “laks”. That could be translated as “lazy” but is more in the line of “lacking/failing to”. You know, just to add to the weight of the rudeness.

Man: “It’s a good thing I came to remind you! Have a good day now.”

He proceeds to show himself back out. I stand there stunned for a good minute, and finally, my brain sends me the words I really should have said.

Me: “No, I will not have you set foot in my house without permission, and I can do without the rudeness, thank you very much!”

Alas, my closed door doesn’t take heed of that.

A storm causes a tree to fall across the powerlines, tearing them completely off the building.

I call up the power company to report it and get a repair crew out. I am met with a woman who is obviously reading from a script and is very devoted to it.

Me: “A tree came down and tore the wires off my house, so I need a repair crew to come out and re-attach them.”

Call Center Agent: “Before we do that, go out and flip the main breaker on and off. That often fixes issues.”

Me: “That won’t do anything. The power lines are lying on the ground. They are no longer physically attached to the building.”

She keeps insisting I go and flip the breaker. I’m not getting anywhere, so I finally said I will. I put the phone down, wait a minute or two, and pick it up.

Me: “Didn’t work.”

Call Center Agent: “Okay, I guess we will have to send a crew out to try and find out what the problem is.”

I had a good laugh with the crew when they arrived. I told them about my call and said I really hoped they’d be able to figure out what was wrong.

I had two twin mattresses that I needed to throw away, so I called my local trash service.

Receptionist: “[Township] trash, this is [Receptionist]. How can I help you?”

Me: “Hi. I have two twin mattresses I’d like to have picked up.”

Receptionist: “We can only take one large item per household per week. I can put you down for two weeks in a row, though.”

Me: “Okay, that works. Thank you!”

My husband and I lugged both mattresses outside the night before pickup, leaning one against the side of the house next to the front door and the other on the back of our car.

The garbage truck came as usual, but this time, a man got out and came to our door. He pounded on the door until I opened it.

Me: “Yes?”

Man: “You know it’s only one item per house per week?”

Me: “I do.”

Man: “So, why do you have two mattresses out?”

I pointed to the mattress beside the door.

Me: “This one is for pick-up next week.”

The man sighed, grabbed the second mattress, lugged it down to the garbage truck, and threw it in the back on top of the first mattress. I don’t know what he heard when I was talking, but at least I got rid of both mattresses at once!

I rent an apartment through a housing association. One day, I discover no water coming from my taps anymore, so I call the housing association for some clarification. They tell me they’ve had other tenants from my building calling with the same problem, but they transfer me to the city’s water company.

Me: “Hi. I’m calling because there’s no water coming from my taps. I wondered if there was unannounced plumbing maintenance somewhere that might be the cause?”

Employee: “Have you just moved into this apartment by any chance?” 

Me: “No, I’ve been living here for four years.” 

Employee: “When is the last time you received your water bill from us?”

Me: “I have not, because I—”

He cuts me off rather rudely and puts on a really condescending tone.

Employee: “Ma’am, you do know you have to pay us in order to get water in your apartment. It’s how the world works. You can’t expect to get water for free. If you don’t pay, your water can get shut off, so there’s no surprise there.”

Me: “If you’d let me finish… The water services are included in my rent, so no, I don’t get direct bills from you, as those are handled by [Housing Association]. Plus, I have heard that other tenants have complained there is no water currently, so it’s not just me. Now, can you please confirm that there is a water outage at my address?”

Employee: “Oh… Erm… No… We have nothing in our system about an outage. Can you try your taps again for me, please?”

It’s been a few minutes since I last tried, so I humour him. Lo and behold, water comes out of my taps just fine again.

Me: “Well, look at that. Looks like it’s resolved itself in the meantime.”

Employee: “Yeah, well, next time, check our website to see if there is a confirmed water outage in your area because there was nothing I could do for you now. Bit of a time-waster.” 

Me: “Excuse me for wasting your time, then. Goodbye.” *Hangs up*