Unfiltered Story #91991

, , | Unfiltered | August 30, 2017

I was at the DMV to renew my Driver’s license…and it was MOBBED. There was a line of roughly 20 cars circling round-and-round the lot looking for a space to park. There was one car parked to the side with the 4-way flashers on. I, and everyone else in line passed her several times. When a spot opened up, I took it. I get out and she pulls up….

Her: “Didn’t you see me?!? I was waiting for a spot”
Me: “We were all waiting for a spot. You were parked off to the side”
Her: “Well, that’s my spot!”
Me: “Sorry” (and I casually walked inside)

I’m not sorry…when you see 20 other cars, in a line, circling a parking lot looking and waiting for a space to open up….you get in line and hope for the best. You don’t park off to the side and assume someone’s going to say “oh…that lady back there…maybe she was waiting for a spot….I’ll just go ahead and leave it for her.”

Their Stupidity To Be Given No Quarter

| Working | July 9, 2017

(I’m at the Department of Motor Vehicles renewing my driver’s license when this occurs.)

DMV Employee #1: “Okay, so that’ll be $16, and you can pay by cash or check.”

(A door opens and a second DMV employee leans their head out.)

DMV Employee #2: “[DMV Employee #1], if I have 180 quarters, how many dollars is that?”

DMV Employee: #1: *speechless*

Me: *speechless*

DMV Employee #2: “I mean, like, do you times it by four?”

DMV Employee #1: *speechless*

Me: “45 dollars. It’s… 45 dollars.”

DMV Employee #2: “Oh, okay.” *exits*

Me: “Was that for real?”

DMV Employee #1: “Unfortunately… yes.”

Me: “Oh, jeez, I’m sorry.”

DMV Employee #1: “It’s even worse… That’s the manager!”

1 Thumbs

Driving Himself To Jail

, , , , , | Right | June 17, 2017

(I am in line at the DMV getting my new tags for 2015.)

Customer: “I would like to renew my driver’s license, please.”

Lady: “Sure, just let me see your card.”

(The man hands her his license and she enters some numbers into the computer.)

Lady: “Sir, your license expired in 1998. Have you been driving with it since then?”

Customer: “Wait, they expire? I though you just had to get a new picture! Well, what are you going to do, arrest me?”

(A police officer steps out of line.)

Officer: “Yes, as a matter of fact, I will arrest you for driving without a valid license.”

(The officer arrested the man and took him off to his car and drove away.)

1 Thumbs

Won’t Forgive You For A Hundred Years

| Related | March 13, 2017

(I overhear this story while waiting in line.)

Woman #1: “On Monday I dressed up my daughter for the 100th Day thing”

Woman #2: “Hundred Day?”

Woman #1: “Yes. It was the 100th day of the school year. They sent home a letter the week before explaining it. They were celebrating by having the kids bring in 100 of anything; pennies, candies, bits of cereal. You know, as a visual to see what 100 looks like.”

Woman #2: “I see. That’s cute.”

Woman #1: “And this year they were doing a parallel to 100 years because our town is 100 years old this year. Kids were encouraged to dress up as if they were 100 years old. So, I put her in a long dress with an apron, put her hair up in a bun, and gave her a bonnet. I even drew wrinkles on her face.”

Woman #2: “Oh that sounds adorable. I bet she was quite a hit. You are such a good mother.”

Woman #1: “Well, not so much. The 100th Day celebration was Tuesday.”

1 Thumbs

An A-Moose-ing Interaction

, , | Right | October 31, 2016

(It is Halloween. My father and I want to get new licenses for the family car he is giving me. My father is wearing a moose costume and the lady at the desk is dressed as a devil. I do not wear a costume.)

Lady: “Hello, how can I help you today?”

Father: “Hi, we would like to get new plates for her.”

Lady: “Very well. *to me* “Here are the forms to fill.” *to my father* “Are you a moose or a deer?”

Father: “Wait, let me check…” *he places his hands around his mouth in a cup position* “MOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

(The lady, I, and the whole waiting area where people are sitting, have eyes wide open and dropped jaws.)

Father: “Yep, I believe I am a moose!”

Supervisor: *coming over* “[Lady], is everything okay?”

Lady: *cracking up laughing* “I believe a moose sang me a love song.”

Supervisor: “Did you moose-sing back to him?”

Me: *face-palm*

1 Thumbs