These Pancakes Are Stacked Against You

, , , , | Working | September 17, 2019

(I am in a bout of depression, which isn’t helped by my little sister being in the hospital in Boston, with both parents with her. It is my birthday, and I have to work in the afternoon, so I decide to get myself a treat and make use of a certain restaurant’s coupon for a free stack of pancakes on your birthday. I go in and I am one of maybe ten tables being served. I’ll fully admit I look horrible, wearing a hoodie, jeans, and sneakers, with hair unbrushed.)

Waitress: *after seating me* “What would you like today?”

Me: “Can I get a pot of coffee? Also, I have a coupon for a free stack of pancakes.”

Waitress: *smile fading* “Anything else?”

Me: “No, thanks.”

(The waitress walks away without another word. She comes back with my pancakes and a pot of coffee, and leaves again as I thank her. I eat quietly, watching as she checks in on other customers, and gives me nothing but sideways glances. As soon as I am done with my pancakes:)

Waitress: “All done? I can take that from you.”

(She picked up my dishes and walked off. I watched as she glanced back at me and started talking to a waiter quietly. He looked at me, then shrugged at her and walked off. She came back a minute later with the check, told me I could pay at the front desk, and walked off. I got up and went to pay with the last $10 I had. My coffee came to about $3, and clearly the waitress didn’t expect to get a tip from some grungy teenager for a $3 order. I walked back to my table, downed the last of my coffee, and tucked the remaining $7 under the mug and walked out. My only regret is that I didn’t get to see her face. Never judge a book by its cover! I may have looked like trash, but that’s no excuse for poor service!)

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Found An Opening

, , , , | Right | September 11, 2019

(We usually get to the store ten to fifteen minutes before opening. My coworker has lifted the gate just barely enough to get through and is heading to the back room when he hears something and turns around to see a man IN the store.)

Man: *standing in a room with no lights on and having just gone under a three-quarters-closed gate* “Are you open?”

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Carting Them Some Of Their Own Medicine

, , , | Right | September 10, 2019

(I am working in the lot at the grocery store, gathering carriages. I have a sore spot for people who leave their carts in random spots — handicapped people and the elderly excluded for obvious reasons. I notice a man putting his cart in the handicap unloading zone, the yellow striped line area for wheelchair ramps and elevators.)

Me: “Sir, in the future, please place your carriage in the designated area.”

Customer #1: “Okay.”

(He and a nearby customer then proceed to mock me.)

Customer #2: *pointing at another carriage* “Look. Another carriage! We have to find out who put it there!”

Customer #1: “We got ourselves a parking lot attendant or something!”

Me: “Sir, I’m just asking you to do that so that other people can park without risk of running into them or having them blown into cars.”

Customer #1: “Nobody’s going to park where I put it.”

Me: *getting fed up with these two* “We let people park there if there are no other spaces, and you still shouldn’t place the cart there.”

(The place is blocked off so handicap people with ramps or elevators have space to get out.)

Customer #2: “Why do you care so much? Just do your job!”

(They continue to mock me, at which point I lose my patience.)

Me: “Don’t quit your day job to become a comedian.”

Customer #2: *suddenly angry* “What did you say?! So, you wanna be a smart-mouthed punk, huh?!” *which is how he’d been acting, ironically* “You know, let’s go talk to your manager! How about that?!”

Me: *a little nervous but keeping my cool* “Okay.”

Customer #2: “What’s your name?” *looks at my name tag* “[My Name], two years, huh? Well, you aren’t gonna make three!” 

(He then drove off, and thankfully, my manager never got a call.)

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, , , , , | Related | September 4, 2019

(I play Dungeons & Dragons with my friends every week. Tonight, we’re meeting at my house. The group consists of four boys and me, a lesbian. I am out to my friends but not to my mom. After the game is over and the boys are gone, my mom comes in to talk to me.)

Mom: “Your friends are really nice.”

Me: “Yeah, they’re cool.”

Mom: “Why aren’t you dating one of them?”

Me: “Uh…”

Mom: “What about [Friend #1]? He’s so charming.”

Me: “He’s also four years younger than me.”

Mom: “So? He’s mature for his age.”

Me: “I’m 23. I’m not dating a 19-year-old. Also, I just don’t like him that way.”

Mom: “What about the others?”

Me: “[Friend #2] is gay, [Friend #3] is engaged, and [Friend #4] is dating my best friend.”

(She continued to make those comments every time this group of boys came over. A few months later, I actually did come out to her and she was not as warm about it as I’d hoped. I started dating a girl who was 20 years old and my mom frequently made comments about how she was too young for me. This happened over six months ago and she still tries to set me up with my guy friends.)

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School Can’t Prepare You For This Kind Of Life

, , , , | Learning | August 28, 2019

(I work at an elementary school. I am talking to one of my students at recess and the conversation turns to the local hockey team.)

Student: “My grandma’s boyfriend used to play for [Local Hockey Team].” 

Me: “Really? That’s so cool!”

Student: “Yeah, except now he plays for [Different Team]. Well, he’s not really her boyfriend. They’re dating, but they’re not official. They’re waiting until he leaves his wife. He doesn’t want to divorce her yet because they have two daughters and he wants to wait until they’re eighteen. If he breaks up with her now then she’ll go crazy and blame it on him. So they’re not official yet.”

Me: “Um… That’s nice.”

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