Happy Birthday to the United States of America!  Today we celebrate… with barbeques and picnics and parties and, of course, lots and lots of fireworks.

Here are some of our favorite stories about the Fourth of July.  Enjoy!  And if you’d like to share your own tale of the Fourth, leave us a comment or submit it here!

Happy Treason Day! — But will they be serving tea?

Viva La Revelation — There’s no independence from annoying customers…

Independent Of The Closing Times — …or the entitled customers…

Independent Of This Holiday — …or the geographically confused customer.

Independent Of Your Day — Some Americans still forget that Canada is not the US.

The Fourth Is Not Strong With This One — Some British still forget that the US is not part of Great Britain.

Murica! The Lullaby — Well, is there one?

Not The Brightest Spark In The Firework Display — Same holiday, different day?

Were You Born On The Third Of July? — Same holiday, different month?

Those Silly Colonies And Their Quaint Rebellion — Same holiday, different holiday?

Leap Days Of Logic — Different country, different calendar?

An Argument For The Separation Of Church And State — And sometimes folks forget that we still have ties to where our country came from!

It’s time for the June roundup! Our editors have decided among themselves which stories in February deserve the extra attention, regardless of the number of thumbs-ups they received. Out of the 807 stories we posted in the month, we’ve singled out fourteen.

If there are any stories from the last month you feel we should have included, please let us know in the comments!

Don’t forget to vote for your favorite stories in the poll below! Note: You can choose up to three. The winner of the previous roundup poll was Sued To Satisfaction, from the Right category!

Has The Authority To Tell You How It Is – I have less than zero authority to give you a discount, which is also the number of f***’s I give.

Dusting Off The Scum – Don’t do the crime if you can’t turn off the cameras.

Their Biggest Handicap Is Themself – Don’t piss off a mama bear!

What The Check Are You Playing At –  Checks will bounce, like customers will off of windows.

Not The Kind Of “Fall Into My Arms” Story We’re Used To – Old people come fully armed and ready to serve.

No Red Alerts For This Red Light – Cops are humans too.

It’s Not The Postman Going Postal Today – What happens when you take their “rules” and throw it right back at them.

They’re All Tuned In To Each Other – This is going to get you all rent out of shape.

They Went Back To The Future – Growing old together doesn’t mean growing up!

If You Treat The Cows Like Crap… – The second half of this title needs no explanation.

Sometimes You Just Have To Bear With Them – They were bear-ly aware.

These Finals Are A Piece Of Cake – This dorm is not the norm… sadly.

The Worst Of Times Brings Out The Best In People – Where were YOU when 9/11 happened?

Don’t Know Their Own Monkey-Business – Know your monkeys, or the little monkeys will teach you.

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With the release of Jurassic Word: Fallen Kingdom in theaters today, we thought we’d have a go at rounding up some dino-themed stories for your prehistoric pleasure. And yes… we have a T-Rex.

Jurassic Lark — When a museum makes up “live dinosaurs” to attract visitors.

Jurassic Spark Of Life — Love can be like a Velociraptor — testing the fences for weaknesses.

Jurassic Farce — Velociraptors are the best defense against outrageous customers.

Hopefully, This Attitude Will Go Extinct — Because there’s no plesiosauring some people.

She’s Obviously Seen Jurassic Park III — It was a… painful movie.

The Jurassic Era Of Train Travel — This story is totally historically accurate, even the part with dinosaurs on trains.

Past The Jurassic Trimester — You might want to bottle-feed this one…

This Is Why Jurassic Park Is PG-13 — Dinosaurs and children: what a wonderful mix.

A Dinosaur Is For Life, Not Just For Christmas — For just $9.99, you can save a homeless dinosaur this Christmas…

It’s time for the May roundup! Our editors have decided among themselves which stories in February deserve the extra attention, regardless of the number of thumbs-ups they received. Out of the 844 stories we posted in the month, we’ve singled out fourteen. Don’t forget to check out our comics too!

If there are any stories from the last month you feel we should have included, please let us know in the comments!

Don’t forget to vote for your favorite stories in the poll below! Note: You can choose up to three. The winner of the previous roundup poll was In A State Of Fight, from the Learning category!

One Way To Be A Lady Killer – He’s only doing the gentlemanly thing by calling her out on her crap.

The Bosses Need To Clean Up Their Act – Treat everyone with respect and dignity, and you’ll always come out on top.

This Prank Has A Drinking Problem – When karma strikes, it doesn’t care if it makes a mess.

Please Just (Bus) Stop – You take the bus? Wow, #MeToo!

Goodbye Fighting, Hello Kitty – The birth of the ‘Pretty Kitties’ sports team! No one knows what they play, but they always win!

Finding Chemo – F*** cancer, but also f*** the insurance companies that let the patients die from it.

Sued To Satisfaction – Quite possibly the most satisfying story we’ve ever had on this site.

Someone Needs To Have An Urgent Conversation With Rufus – Little Rufus loves playing with his friend Joffrey…

That’s Not Very Lice – The best way to handle strangers who can’t keep their hands to themselves.

Checkout This Justice! – A story where the customer ACTUALLY gets what’s coming to them?!

Emperor Of The Ridiculous – The epic saga of Emperor Joshua Norton the First.

Do You Speak Asian? – Yes I do, but I don’t speak Bigot.

You’re In Trouble, No Ifs Or Slapped Butts – Who decided to invite Uncle Pervert?

Winter Is Coming, But So Is Kindness – A warming story to close out the month!

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In honor of our new Legal category, here are some of our best stories about, by, and from our law enforcement communities.

Some Days Start Off With A Bang — An explosive day at the Cop Shop.

Rare Flashes of Intelligence — His eye for detail isn’t quite what they need.

Driving Miss Crazy, Part 2 — Entitled Jerk + Scene of Accident = Disaster About To Happen.

Doesn’t Have The Head For This Kind Of Work — This guy needs 911 like he needs a…

You’re Chalked And They’re Cheese(d Off) — When you outsmart yourself right into a ticket.

Emergency Services Must Be Pooped — Something smelled about this call.

So Cute You Could Just Eat Them Up — Who does the fox eat?

Driving In Laps — Apparently this poor officer pulled over a Clown Car.

Respect For Convenience Trumps Respect For The Dead — She wouldn’t accept that no means no, so she got a time-out!

An Emerging Emergency — This kid is learning when to call 911… sorta…