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17 Awful Customers Ordering Food

| Right | June 9, 2020

Dear readers,

In our continuing coverage of workers that keep our world running during these crazy times, we move on to food delivery drivers. When we’ve had a bad day, don’t have enough food to cook, or are just plain too tired, these drivers get that comfort food out to us pronto!

So we’ve included them in our shout-outs, like we have to:

We’ve linked all these shout-outs again as they’ve now been optimized to be easier to read and navigate, especially for our mobile users!

But for now, enjoy these 17 stories of deliveries, drivers, and dreadful customers!


Deliver Us From Bad Customers – Please risk the driver’s life so I don’t have to risk mine, thanks!

Safety Before Stupid Customers – Please ensure the driver gets mugged and killed after I get my food, not before!

We Try Not To Die For A Pie – Get the pizza in 45 minutes or not at all because our driver died.

How Is My Excuse? Call 1-800-NOT-ALWAYS-RIGHT – Delivery drivers: Damned if they’re too fast, damned if they’re too slow.

The Customer Is Always Right (And Regular) – This job is all about movement.

Won’t Like The State Of The Pizza – That’s going to be really cold by the time it gets there.

Some Customers Are Ice Cold – You’ve been a-salted on her driveway.

Driving Out The Lies – Delivery drivers are the first in line for being scammed.

Timing Is All In The Delivery – Waiting for pizza is like watching TV: 45 minutes, 90 with ads.

Not Panning Out Well – The drivers should pay their own darn insurance!

Watch For Grease Stains In The Concord – We’ll keep the food warm on the jet engine for you!

Going For Broke With The Gouda – By far the cheesiest story on this list.

And They Wonder Why Their Pizza Is Cold – How dare they stick to the speed limit!

Deliver Us From Stupidity – By the process of elimination…

If You Can’t Bring The Pizza To The Mountain… – If the mountains are moving then he has bigger things to worry about than pizza!

Donuts Or Donuts, There Is No Try – We really hope she’s pregnant.

We Love To Deep Dish On Bad Customers – Delivery drivers close the same time as the store, why is that so difficult to understand?


We hope you enjoyed this collection of stories! Know any that we missed? Let us know in the comments! Want to submit your own story? Do it here!

Stay safe, everyone!

Have you been enjoying our roundups? Check out more here to see if you’ve missed any!