I work in the parts department at a power sports place. A customer comes in with a bike belt and says he needs to buy a replacement. He starts pitching a fit at me because we don’t have this certain belt in stock.

Me: “Sir, we’ll have to special order it in for you.”

Customer: “You don’t know what the f*** you’re doing! I want to see your manager!”

I inform my manager of the situation and give him the belt the man brought in to show us what he needs. My manager throws the belt at him and says:

Manager: “Eat that and s*** yourself out a new one, and then get the f*** out of my store.”

Customer: “I’m never going to buy from you again! I’m going to get you fired!”

Manager: “I’m going to call the cops if I have to tell you to leave again.”

After he left, I checked his purchase history. He’d spent a whopping $50 with us over the last five years.

My husband and I tried to purchase a camper from a large company, but we didn’t like the extremely pushy and aggressive sales tactics used by the salesman, so we left without buying anything.

For months after, we received texts and calls from various numbers, all extensions from [Company]. We kept telling them we were not interested and started blocking the numbers, but they kept changing and kept coming.

Finally, I was driving by the company one day and decided to pull in to ask someone in person to stop. The same salesman from our first visit approached me at the door.

Salesman: “Hi! What are you looking for today?”

Me: “Hi. I’d like to talk to whoever is in charge of reaching out to people. Like calling and texting about sales and whatnot?”

Salesman: “Oh, no problem! I can take your number and put you on our list. Did you have a specific—”

Me: “No. Actually, I have told you guys at least a dozen times that I did not want to be on your call lists, and they keep coming.”

I show him the text conversations that all start with “[Company] is having a sale!” and the times I’ve replied with “STOP”.

Salesman: “Oh. I don’t think that was us, though.”

Me: “Okay, well, the next time someone calls me with a pitch from [Company], I’m going to blast an air horn into the phone. Are we clear?”

Salesman: “Yeah, I get it. It wasn’t us, but I get it.”

I left and went on my way. Thankfully, I haven’t had a call or text from them since!

I work in the hunting department of a sporting goods store. A woman comes up to me.

Customer: “Where can I find the perfume?”

Me: “We’re a sporting goods store; we don’t sell perfume.”

Customer: “No, you do! A friend of mine got some here a few weeks ago! It had a picture of a deer on it!”

I finally realize what her friend bought.

Me: “That’s not perfume.”

Customer: “What is it?”

Me: “Deer urine.”

Customer: “Is that French?”

I tried to explain this to the woman, but she refused to listen to me and bought three packs.

A lady tries to return a pair of shoes that she bought from our online store to train in for her upcoming marathon.

Customer: “The shoes gave me blisters, but I still ran in them for a week hoping they would become worn-in.”

Me: “No problem. They’re probably just the wrong size.”

I open up the box to find a pair of Birkenstocks!

Me: “Ma’am, I think I know the problem. You’re not meant to train for a marathon in heavy leather sandals.”

Customer: “But I read on Facebook that they were the most comfortable shoes, so I figured they would be great for training in.”

I used to work at a mom-and-pop store that sold clothes, farm supplies, animals, and sporting goods. Since we sold sporting goods, we also sold bait fish. Fishermen would frequently stop by our store to buy them to fish with and they were sold by the dozen. Usually, when I scooped bait, I would give a few extra fish to my customers.

I had a lady come in to purchase bait fish, so just as I normally did, I scooped a net full of fish and started dumping them in the bag, counting them individually, and added a few extra to the bag. The lady watched me do this.

Lady: “You didn’t give me the correct amount!”

Me: “Ma’am, not only did I give you the dozen you paid for, but I gave you a few extra.”

I had literally just counted them, and I had done this for long enough that I was really good at eyeing when it was over a dozen. This lady just kept insisting that I hadn’t given her enough.

Me: “Okay, let’s count together just to be sure.”

I dumped all the fish from the bag back into the net, and we started counting together, very slowly, “One… two… three… four…” and so on. We got to twelve, and it was very clear that there were several extra fish still in the net. I looked up at her.

Me: “Ohhh, you were right. I didn’t give you the right amount.”

I then proceeded to dump the remaining fish back into the tank right in front of her and give her exactly the amount she had paid for.

She just looked bewildered when I handed the fish back to her, and she left.

I did start applying this philosophy to the customers who bought crickets.