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These Shoes Were Made For Calling

, , | Right | July 8, 2021

I answer the phone to a young boy, who inquires about a high-end basketball shoe that basketball teams wear.

Me: “Sorry, our store doesn’t carry that shoe.”

The kid hangs up. Ten minutes later, I answer the phone to the same kid, asking about the same shoe!

Me: “Excuse me, but you called just ten minutes ago.”

Kid: “My mom told me to call back, and speak to a different person.”

Me: “Well, speaking to a different person will not change the fact that we do not carry this shoe.”

Kid: *Click.*

How stupid can parents be?!

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Making A Lot Of Noise To Stop A Lot Of Noise

, , , , , , , | Right | May 14, 2021

I stop at the local sporting goods store to get bait. I can hear a commotion before I even go into the store; someone is screaming, threatening, etc.

I get my bait and go to stand in line to check out; I am fourth in line. First in line is this woman who’s literally screaming.

Customer #1: “I’ll sue!”

Customer #1: “I demand…”

Customer #1: “I want…”

Customer #1: “You’d better….”

The poor two employees are trying to calm her down. [Customer #2] in line, a small fellow, turns to us with an index finger up in the “give me a moment” posture, steps out of line, and goes back into the aisles. He returns with an air horn can.

He then blasts the screaming woman with the air horn. She turns to scream at him, and he blasts her again. Every time she opens her mouth, he gives another blast until she storms out of the store, still screaming.

[Customer #2] walks up to the counter, put his purchases down, and hands the air-horn to the checker:

Customer #2: “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything. I just wanted to try this out to make sure it worked; just add it to the rest of my stuff.”

The two employees look at each other.

Employee: “Since it has been used, it is now damaged goods, and we can’t sell it to you. You can keep it, no charge.”

The tension which has built up within the store dissipates and turns to laughter.

Customer # 2: “What was that all about?”

Employee: “We have no idea. She came in like that and we never did understand what the problem was. We sincerely thank you for all of your purchases.”


This story is part of our Best Of May 2021 roundup!

Read the next Best Of May 2021 roundup story!

Read the Best Of May 2021 roundup!

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Don’t Ever Bat For The Rude Ones

, , , , | Right | November 2, 2020

We have a promotional deal at our sports store that if you bring in an old bat, you get a discount on your new one. However, customers are taking advantage of it and corporate sends out a notice to only allow customers one trade-in.

I have a customer come in with her husband and her son. I am currently working as the door greeter. One of my duties is to intercept the old bats and give the customer a slip for their turn-in.

Me: “Hello! Welcome to [Sports Store]! Do you have a bat trade-in today?”

Customer: “Yes!”

She turns around and grabs a total of four from her husband.

Me: “Unfortunately, ma’am, we are only allowed to do one trade-in.”

Customer: “Are you kidding me?! Why?!”

Me: “That is the policy set in place. I’m sor—”

Customer: *Cuts me off* “Ridiculous! That is so stupid.” 

Me: “I understand, ma’am, but that is our policy. If you’d like, I can get the manager.”

Customer: “Do that.”

I radio the manager and she says that she will be coming up from the back office.

Customer: “What’s to say that don’t I turn in one here and then do the same at all of the other [Sports Store]s in town?”

Me: “Well, it’s on an honor basis, but—”

Customer: *Cuts me off again* “This is so stupid.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but my manager is coming up to speak with you about this.”

Customer: “Yeah, I know. When did y’all even start this?”

At this point, everyone within a ten-foot radius can hear her yelling. My manager still hasn’t come up yet. She interrupts me again as I am trying to explain.

Customer: “Yeah, yeah, whatever.” *Waves me off* 

Me: “Okay, you don’t need to be rude.”

Customer: “Excuse me?!”

I’ve turned my attention to other customers coming in because I’m annoyed with her disrespect toward me. I overhear the customer’s husband ask what happened and she tells him I called her rude.

Customer’s Husband: “Did you really tell my wife that she is rude?!”

Me: “Yes. I did.”

Customer’s Husband: “Wow, so much for customer service. You should work on that.”

Me: “Okay. Great. Thanks.”

My manager comes up and handles the situation, telling her everything I said. The customer yells and gets angry and interrupts my manager the same as she did me. She finally just leaves with her family in tow. My manager leaves to her office and tells me to just shake it off.

Another customer comes up to me and says:

Other Customer: “I’m so sorry you had to deal with that. They were awful. You don’t deserve that. I hope you have a great day.”

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Gumming Up The Works With Gum

, , , , | Working | August 11, 2020

My husband and I have just finished picking out shoes to buy. We get in line at the checkout. A cashier with no line calls to us.

Cashier: *Waves* “Hey! I can take you over here!”

We walk to the cashier and put our shoeboxes on the counter.

Cashier: “Did you find everything okay?”

The cashier opens our shoeboxes to make sure everything is there, and a father and preteen son enter the store and walk the wrong way through our checkout line. The son spots a container of gum on the counter.

Son: “Dad! They have gum!”

Father: “How much is it?”

Son: “Fifteen cents.”

Failing to see that the cashier is already in the middle of a transaction, the father takes a piece of gum out of the container, tosses a quarter onto the counter, and walks away without waiting for change. The son also fishes a piece out of the container.

Son: “Is this good?”

Cashier: “Actually, it’s pretty bad…”

The son hands over a quarter.

Cashier: “Wait, I need to give you and your dad change.”

Son: “That’s okay!”

The son walks away.

Cashier: *To us* “Sorry about that.” *Continues to ring us up* “They have no idea what a pain it is to pay for something with a quarter and not wait for change.”

Husband: “Oh? You can’t keep it as a tip?”

Cashier: “It has to go into a pool, with a note explaining why I didn’t give exact change.”

Husband: “Wow. That really isn’t worth it.”

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A Broken Toilet Seat Has Painful Implications

, , , , | Related | July 20, 2020

My mom and brothers have started going camping. My mom saw a toilet seat online that attaches to a bucket to make a portable toilet. The store we go to doesn’t have just the seat for sale. If you want the seat, you buy the bucket, as well.

My mom is testing the product to see how the toilet seat comes off.

Me: “Mom, maybe buy it before you break it.” 

Mom: “No. [Brother], come and help me with this.”

Brother: “Mom! You’re going to break it. Then we have to buy it.”

Mom: “No, they have insurance against this sort of thing.”

I Googled it later. A lot of stores have a “You Break It, You Buy It” policy that you agree to by entering the store. I wasn’t able to check if that store had the policy, but chances are, it did. If my mom had broken the product, she would be using a broken toilet seat on a camping trip.

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