You Think Mama Bear Is Bad? Meet Auntie Bear!

I was shopping with my niece at a local used bookstore I’d been frequenting for years. I had a few books to trade in, so I stopped by the employee at the register while my niece headed straight to the books. I greeted the employee at the register and we got to talking about our families. I should mention that I work with medically fragile children and I’ve been told that my usual speaking voice is very soft and gentle out of pure habit.

Eventually, I went wandering through the bookshelves, and I could hear my niece on the other side of the section I was in talking to someone who turned out to be an employee I’d seen a few times but never interacted with.

Niece: “But my auntie always says it’s okay.”

Employee #1: “Look, just tell her this isn’t a library. You don’t want it, don’t take it.”

Niece: “But how do you know you like it if you haven’t read it yet?”

Employee #1: “What are you, r******d? I said don’t grab so many books if you don’t know what you want!”

Niece: “But how do you know what you want if you’ve never read them?”

My niece didn’t sound upset, just confused. Just the same, I rounded the corner quickly to see what was going on. I came upon the employee apparently trying to take some books out of my niece’s hands while my niece was holding them behind her back to protect them and backing away from her.

Then, the employee placed one hand on top of my niece’s head to keep her in place and reached for the books again. I will confess that I absolutely overreacted at seeing that. I shouted in a very loud voice:

Me: “GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR G**D*** MIND?!”

The employee literally jumped away from my niece and ran to the back of the store. The employee from the register came running, along with a few other customers, to see what the screaming was about. He looked shocked.

Employee #2: “Who was shouting? What’s going on?”

Me: “That woman was holding onto [Niece] and trying to take books away from her! You tell her to keep her hands off other people’s children before she winds up in a body cast!”

[Employee #2] looked even more shocked.

Employee #2: “That was you yelling? I thought it was an angry lumberjack or a bear! Wait. She did what?”

Niece: *Still calmly* “I was picking a few books and she said I could only have one. Then she tried to take them all away.”

Me: “I’m sorry. I watched her put her hands on [Niece] and I lost it.”

Employee #2: “No harm done. I just can’t believe that was you! You were actually snarling.”

Niece: “Daddy says Auntie only goes Mama Bear when she’s with us. One time, this big man at the pizza buffet pushed [Nephew] out of line to cut, and Auntie made him say he was sorry. Daddy said that man needed new pants. Auntie, why did that man need new pants?”

I could feel myself turning red, and the other customers who’d run over were now chuckling and leaving.

The employee promised to call the owner and let them know about what happened. He also offered to give my niece her books for free, but I insisted on paying for them.

The next time I came into the store on my own, I ran into a completely different employee who also knew me as a regular. She was helping another customer when I came in and stopped mid-sentence to say:

Employee #3: “Holy crap, did you seriously growl at someone? I thought [Employee #2] was full of it, but a couple of people that were here that day said you wolfed out on [Employee #1]! [Owner] fired her crazy butt, by the way. Did you know she hid in the freakin’ storage closet until you left?”

The customer she’d been serving chimed in.

Customer: “Serves her right. What kind of idiot puts their hands on someone else’s child?”

I just kind of nodded, too embarrassed to answer. When I got up to the register, the employee pulled out the two books I had ordered from behind the desk.

Me: “How did that other customer know what you were talking about?”

Employee #3: “Are you kidding? Everyone’s been talking about you going She-Hulk! We didn’t know you had it in you. It was the most awesome thing that’s ever happened in this place! Here. These books are on [Owner], and she said your niece gets her next book for free. No arguments, and please don’t growl at me!”

The last part was said in a joking tone, so I felt a little less embarrassed… until I saw the sticky note on my books. Where it usually said my name, instead, it said, “Mama Bear.”

I still go to that store regularly. You gotta love people who forgive you when you aren’t on your best behavior.