This occurs during fencing club training. One of the veteran fencers was fencing a newbie, and the newbie just got stabbed in the groin. The rest of the fencers; me, another veteran fencer and his opponent are all looking at him while suppressing laughter.
Newbie: *rolling on the floor in pain* F*ck! Is that even legal!
Opponent: Yeah, the d*ck is in the accepted target zone for both foil and epee.
Veteran: Uh huh, perfectly viable tactic.
Newbie: *Still clutching his family jewels on the floor* Seriously?
Me: *slinging an arm over [Veteran]’s shoulder* Yep. And something tells me that all of three us love using that tactic.
[Veteran], [Opponent] and I all smile unrepentantly and nod, giving double thumbs up to [Newbie].
Newbie: *Betrayed voice* Isn’t that cowardly? Don’t you have pride as a man?
Me: Nope. I’m transgender. No such thing as male pride.
Opponent: Who cares as long as you win?
Veteran: I have, but that and winning are separate.
Newbie: *flips us off while still rolling on the floor, muttering Russian swear words*
Coach: *Walking out of supply closet* You know, I once had a student who got hit down there so many times and got very angry about it, so he would take one of these *shows us the plastic armour cup meant for girls to wear over their breast* and put it down there instead.
The coach puts the boob armour over his groin and thrusts it out proudly, all of us doubling over in laughter at the sight of him and the idea that someone was silly enough to do such a thing.
Coach: *unfazed by the hilarity* Anyone want to borrow this?
Newbie: *holds out hand* None of you say a damn thing. *receives cup from the coach* Especially to the girls!
We told the girls. They found the whole incident as hilarious as we did. [Newbie] has yet to live it down.
