Unfiltered Story #147190

, , , | Unfiltered | April 20, 2019

I work in a restaurant, which although are made to look independent are actually part of the same chain so we all have the same menu. I served these 2 guys one lunchtime

me: hi guys can I get you any desserts

customer 1: I’ve got a question. Are these all the deserts you do? You don’t do any cheesecake?

me: nope just these desserts listed here

customer 1: so no cheesecake then

me: no, all the desserts that are listed on our dessert menu are the desserts we sell

customer 1: so you’ve got no cheesecake then?

me: no just these

customer 1: okay, I’ll have the brownie

(as I turn to look at the other guy, before I say anything) customer 2: so no cheesecake then?

Unfiltered Story #147134

, , , | Unfiltered | April 16, 2019

(All staff are authorised to take phone calls, I’m a sales assistant)
Me: Good afternoon, you’ve reached [store], my name is [name] how may I help you?
Caller: …
Me: Hello?
Caller: Hello?
Me: Can I help you today sir?
Caller: I’m sorry, I do not understand.
(I catch what sounds like a Spanish accent)
Me: *in Spanish* You’ve called [store] in [town], can I help you sir?
Caller: Excuse me?
(This goes on with me switching between both languages.)
Me: *in Spanish for the third time* Do you need the help of [store] sir?
Customer: No *click*
(I set the phone down when one of the managers approaches)
Manager: Is everything all right [my name]?
Me: I think I just dealt with a prank call.

On The Midnight Train Going Anywhere

, , , , , | Right | April 9, 2019

(At the station where I work, trains stop running earlier on Saturday nights than on other days. One train line runs from the upper level of the station, and when the service has finished, we pull tapes across the escalators to stop people going up. I’ve just done this and am about to walk away when someone tries to undo the tape on the escalator.)

Me: “Excuse me, sir, that area is closed. There are no more trains from those platforms.”

Customer: “Yes, there are. We’ve got tickets for the 23:15 train to [City about two hours away].”

Me: “I’m afraid there isn’t a 23:15, sir. The last train to [City] left about ten minutes ago.”

(The customer pulls his phone out of his pocket and thrusts it in my face.)

Customer: *with a very smug smile* “Well, here’s my confirmation! Two tickets on the 23:15 to [City]!”

Me: “You’re quite right, sir; that is what it says. The 23:15 to [City]… on Friday. Today is Saturday.”

(There is a moment’s silence while the customer and his partner digest this information.)


(I decide to withdraw and let them sort it out between themselves. About ten minutes later, the customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Um… excuse me? I’m really sorry about earlier. Er… are there any hotels nearby?”

Unfiltered Story #146022

, , , | Unfiltered | April 4, 2019

(The store I work at is in a retail park and a major competitor is three doors down. It’s not uncommon for customers to combine their shopping in one of their bags or ours)
Customer: I want to return this smoke alarm.
Me: Sure, let’s pull up your profile and we can work from there.
(He did indeed buy a number of items on the day he specifies to me, but I notice that a smoke alarm isn’t on them.)
Me: Sir, I think this item was bought from another store here in the business park. We don’t carry it.
Customer: I’m certain I bought it here!
Me: Well, let me check the barcode.
(I take a handheld scanner and scan the barcode.)
Me: I’m sorry sir, our database doesn’t recognise the barcode, we don’t carry this item.
Colleague: *looking over my shoulder* She’s right, these have access to the entire database.
Customer: But I bought this from HERE!
Me: Is now a bad time to point out that your bag is from [competitor]?
(The customer looks caught off guard, then looks at his bag)
Me: *pointing in the direction* Three doors down.

Needs To Go “Back” To Reality

, , , , | Right | April 1, 2019

(I work in a small hole-in-the-wall store that specializes mostly in gimmicky gifts and knick-knacks. Most of our stock is either on the floor or stored in cupboards under the displays. We also have a tiny storage closet that we put reserved items in, as well as our cleaning supplies. On this day a lady comes in and looks around at our stuff.)

Customer: “Do you have any of those bobbleheads based off of [Popular Video Game]? There’s none out here!”

Me: “Let me check.”

(I go through the cupboard under the bobbleheads and unfortunately don’t find any.)

Customer: “Can’t you check the back?”

Me: “Doubt we have any, but I’ll have a look.”

(Having been asked about “the back” numerous times, I’ve gotten into the habit of just walking into our storage closet and taking a short break since that usually appeases the customers. Sadly, this lady proves to be the exception.)

Me: *after spending six or so minutes in the closet* “Sorry, it looks like we’re out of that one. We can certainly order one in for you, though.”

Customer: “What? No! You weren’t gone for long enough. You can’t have checked the entire back!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry but we’re very limited on storage space. Our back isn’t that big.”

Customer: “Go check again! You can’t have done it properly!”

(To try and calm her down, I go into the closet again and just play on my phone for a few minutes. Fortunately, it is a slow day and she is the only one there.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but it really looks like we’re out right now. I can still—“

Customer: “NO! You came out too quickly again! You didn’t check the entire back!”

Me: “I promise you, ma’am, there’s not much ‘back’ to check. Seriously, see for yourself.”

(I open the door to show her that the storage closet is literally maybe slightly bigger than a phone booth, with three shelves of reserved items, our broom, a hoover, and cleaning stuff.)

Me: “That’s all there is.”

(The lady stares dumbly at the closet for a moment, and then, to my shock, she charges inside.)

Customer: “It can’t be! You’ve got to have more back here! My nephew’s birthday is today! I need that bobblehead!”

(She starts pounding on the wall, pulling on the shelves, checking — I’m guessing — for some hidden switch that’ll reveal another secret area behind the closet.)


Me: “Lady, that’s it! Our stock is either on the floor or in one of the cupboards on the floor. There’s no other area they could be!”

(The lady continues freaking out. By this point, she’s in danger of pulling the shelves clean off the walls and having the items on them fall on her. I finally have to step in and block her from the closet.)

Me: “Lady, seriously, I’m going to call the police and have you removed if you start destroying the store. I swear to God, there’s no more back; there’s no other place where we keep stock.”

Customer: “No, you have to have another back area! You need to have that bobblehead!”

Me: “Ma’am, I understand your distress, really I do. But as we’ve confirmed, we don’t have it. I can order it for you and have it here in two days via express post, but there’s no way I can get you one today.”

(I hate to admit it, but my heart breaks as this lady looks like she’s going to break down in tears.)

Customer: “But… but… I trusted you! I trusted you to have my nephew’s gift! You’ve ruined everything! Why won’t you show me where the real back is?”

(She left the store in defeat, and sadly, we’ve yet to see her again — seriously, I really didn’t want to upset her that much. I know customers are insistent as h*** about “the back” having everything they’re shopping for, but that’s the only time I’ve witnessed how deep their denial can go if you don’t have what they’re after.)

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