I am working at an automated self checkout when I hear a commotion at one of the terminals. This usually indicates a problem with the machine but I look and it isn’t giving an error message then I hear this from the couple:
Male Customer: … but that’s 43… (looks at receipt and does mental math) it’s supposed to be 44!
Female Customer: let’s go it’s just a penny.
Male Customer: I’m not leaving without my f****** penny. (Sees me) Make this machine give me my f***** penny!
Me: Sir, please lift your bags and I will. (I open the drawer and pull out the penny.) Have a nice day sir! (He leaves mumbling about the machines stealing from him.)

A couple comes up to the register — he’s got a tube of white caulk and some other random items, she’s got the wallet and speaks to me, the cashier:

her: He needed a lot of caulk.
him: (slightly embarassed) C-A-U-L-K.

– – –

Middle-aged guy comes to the register with a 3″ long bolt that he brought in and a nut partway down the threads that he is purchasing for fifteen cents.

him: I only have one nut.

(Coworker who overheard, after the customer left: “I am sooo sorry, sir.”)

(I work at a well-known clothes store. A family has just come in, and they have alot of clothes. They were most likely back-to-school shopping. I ring up their purchases, and then..)
*the alarm beeps*
Mother: What was that?
Father: i don’t know.
*i ring up their purchases yet again*
They then go again, and it still beeps.
Mother: Let’s just go. We’ll probably find out it was a sock or something.
*a few hours later, we get a call from the family*
Father: Hello, I think we found out what clothing article it was.
Me: Well, what was it?
Father: A pair of socks.
Me: *starts cracking up*
Father: Whats so funny?
Me: Oh, nothing.
The mother had said “Oh, it’s probably just a sock or something. It was a sock.

I am about to ring up a coworker’s snack before she takes a break, and the phone rings.

Me: “Thank you for calling (Store name and hours), this is (my name). How may I help you?

The caller asks if we have a product in stock.

Me: “I don’t think I’ve heard of that here, but let me check.”

I pull my phone from my pocket and check the item through the company’s mobile app.

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not finding it on our app. Let me see where else it might be available….” [I search Google.] “Okay, it looks like (retailer) by the mall has that for you.”

She doesn’t reply. I glance at the screen on the store phone and realize she had hung up on me without a word.

Me, to coworker: “In the words of Stephanie Tanner, ‘How rude!'”

Customer calls (yelling): Hi, I’m really furious, I bought some trousers with you last season but they didn’t fit, I didn’t want to return them so i got them altered, this cost me a lot of money.
Me: It was last season? In case you are in any way unsatisfied, you can always return items within 15 days for free.
Customer: I know that, I bought them again and that’s why I’m calling, they don’t fit! Again! You really need to do something, the sizes are wrong!
Me: Of course, I will give your feedback through, these trousers are re-made every season, and we don’t usually have any complaints, let me help you return the trousers…
Customer: NO! You don’t understand! I want trousers that fit! These don’t fit! And I paid a lot of money last time to get them altered and this time they do not fit again!
Me: I understand, you can return the unaltered ones for a refund.
Customer: I don’t want a refund! I want trousers that fit!
Me: Maybe another model would be suitable…
Customer: No! I want these trousers!
And it goes in circles for a while, then I tell her we’ll check with the production department to see if anything changed with the model (it didn’t)