The Signature Of Someone Who Really Needs Their Food

, , , , , | Right | March 23, 2019

(I work as a delivery driver for a café. My hat, shirt, and car all have the company name and logo. I pull up to a customer’s house and knock on the door, holding a bag of food that also has the company name on it.)

Me: “Hello! If I could just get your signature right here on your receipt, that would be great!”

Customer: “There’s no soliciting here! You need to leave right now!” *slams door in my face*

Me: *knocks again*

Customer: *opens door to yell at me again*

Me: “Ma’am, I’m from [Company]. I have your food order.”

Customer: “Oh!” *signs paper, takes food, doesn’t tip*

Unfiltered Story #142113

, , , | Unfiltered | February 27, 2019

I was in the line at the post office.  I was in front of the line and there were 6 people behind me.  Woman #1 is at the other counter filling out change of address forms. Woman #2 who isn’t even with Woman #1 starts talking to her.

Woman #2:  You know if you change your address online they charge you.

Woman #1: I know .

Woman #2:  They shouldn’t do that since you can fill out the papers at the post office for free.

I then put in my 2 cents about it.

Me:  You know it is only a $1.

Woman #2: (She yells this) Well they shouldn’t charge anything. 
She then slams her fists on the counter and storms off.

Me and others in line are trying to hold back laughter.  She was really that upset over a $1 and actually nothing that pertained to her anyways.  I still have no clue if she had business at the post office or what.

Unfiltered Story #135107

, , , | Unfiltered | December 28, 2018

(I work at a store that has a bakery inside.  I’m working the register that is close by when I hear this exchange.  Note that I couldn’t hear all of it, just bits.)

Customer: Why is there no coffee in the pots!

Coworker:  We don’t make coffee after 4, sir. (Note: It’s 4:30, and the bakery has free coffee until 4)

Customer:  Why not?!  You should have coffee 24/7!

Coworker:  I’m sorry sir, but that’s the rule.  We also have a Starbucks if you want coffee.

Customer:  Well, you’re stupid!  I’m going to go complain to the manager about you having no coffee.  You have to make more NOW.

Coworker:  You can go and complain, sir, but the managers will agree with me.

Customer:  Well, I’ll just see about that.  (Storms off)

(I wander over, since no one is checking out with me at the moment.)

Me:  You ok?

Coworker:  What was his problem?  ‘You should have coffee 24/7?’  We’re not even open 24/7!  (The bakery operates 9 am to 6 pm.  The store is open from 6 am to midnight.)

Me:  True.

(At this point, a customer comes up to my lane, so I go to help them.  A few moments later, something occurs to me and I wander over again.)

Me:  I just thought of something funny.

Coworker:  What?

Me:  What if the store manager had come up right when that guy had been yelling at you?

(At this, we both start laughing.  Our store manager is tough as nails, and would never have allowed that guy to keep shouting at my coworker.)

Refunder Blunder: Halloween Special

, , , , , | Right | October 31, 2018

(I work in a seasonal Halloween store.)

Customer #1: “I want to return this.”

(She pulls out a striped suit jacket, one I instantly recognize as part of a two-piece suit of an iconic Halloween movie character. I also realize the rest of her bag is empty.)

Me: “Do you have the rest of the costume?”

Customer #1: “No. Why would I need it?”

Me: “Well, you don’t have all of the costume here, so I can’t do a return. You’d need the entire costume here.”

Customer #1: *thinks for a moment* “But I only need the pants.”

Me: “I can’t do anything without the full costume.”

Customer #1: *shoves the jacket back in the bag* “Ugh. Now what am I going to do?” *storms off*

Me: *waves her off* “Have a nice day!”

(I turn to the next customer in line, who has a look of disbelief on her face.)

Customer #2: “What a dumba**.”

Me: “I’m glad you said it, because I can’t.”

Refunder Blunder, Part 40
Refunder Blunder, Part 39
Refunder Blunder, Part 38

The Great Fall

, , , , | Friendly | October 15, 2018

(I am with a good friend at a fast food restaurant. We place our orders. He gets his soda and for some reason begins moving it back and forth between his hands. In that moment, everything seems to go in slow motion. In one of the hand exchanges, a finger nudges the drink up a bit. He overcompensates with the other hand, and it gets nudged a bit further until… after a series of repeated failed grabs, much like a football receiver desperately trying to hang onto a ball that’s at the tip of his fingers… the cup and contents go above his head and come back down with a grand splat on the ground. He stands there, sheepishly looking at the mess some poor employee is going to have to mop up.)

Me: “Well, that was smooth!”

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