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This Date Was A Bloody Disaster

, , , , , , , , , , | Romantic | August 19, 2023

When I was in seventh grade, I had my first “boyfriend”, i.e. we left notes in each other’s lockers and almost held hands once. We went on a date to the movies, and my mom was the chaperone. I was excited because she was going to let us sit separately from her in the theater and I might finally get my first kiss — every twelve-year-old girl’s dream, right?

As we were standing in line for snacks, I heard someone call my name and looked up to see my stepdad, my two stepsisters, my younger sister, and two of her friends entering the theater acting like they had no idea we’d be there. They sat a few rows below us and spent almost the entire movie giggling and staring at us. I was mortified, and my poor date, an extremely shy boy under normal circumstances, looked like he wanted to just disappear.

Nevertheless, we managed to enjoy the movie, and I was certain we were going to kiss. About three-quarters through the movie, however, [Date] suddenly jumped out of his seat and ran from the theater, and I didn’t see him again for the rest of the night. 

It wasn’t until years later that I found out what happened. [Date] got up to go to the bathroom, and once there, he saw a loose tooth was about ready to come out. He wiggled it until it fell out, along with a bit of blood. He was afraid of blood, and the very sight of it made him vomit and pass out. My stepdad grew concerned about how long he was taking, so he went to the bathroom and found [Date] dizzy and semi-conscious. He tried to call the kid’s mom (this was before cell phones were ubiquitous, and service was unreliable), and all the poor boy managed to get out was, “Mom, I’m bleeding—” before the call dropped. Thus ensued a panicked few minutes in which [Date]’s mom drove to the theater and my parents met her and everything got sorted out, while the rest of us sat clueless in the theater.

We “dated” for a few more months before fizzling out. [Date]’s mom works at town hall, and I see her once a year when I go to renew my car’s registration. She brings up this story every time.

[Date] is now married with a baby on the way, and I’m happily gay, so the worst date ever did not traumatize us too severely.

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