I am a call center agent under Amazon who can handle chat, calls and email.

The following is an abridged version from one of my chats for today:

Me: Hi there, (Customer). I am (Me) here to help you
Customer: The seller gave an inappropriate answer to my question and I want to report it.
I check the details and this item is while SOLD by a seller, it is fufilled by Amazon. So I checked their email conversations:
Customer: I would like to know the expiration date of this?
Seller replied by email: This item has a shelf life of 2 years of average room temperatures.
I am confused what is so inappropriate about a good enough answer that I nearly chatted her reasoning but I just still send out a report to investigate and explained to the customer who took it and we ended the chat peacefully.
What was the item that the customer wanted an exact expiration date that the customer bought? ORGANIC SOAP.

(I’m a high school senior and, as my school is religious, every grade has its own retreat each year. Senior retreat is off-campus and overnight at a center that’s basically a motel crossed with a campsite out in the middle of nowhere. We’re allowed to pick our rooms and roommates so, naturally, my friend group nabs 3 consecutive rooms so we’re 3 to a room. At the end of the day after all of our retreat activities, we all collect in one room. Since I’m more of an early bird, I end up being the first to head to sleep, thankful that my friends picked the room farthest from my own to hang out in. I’m only just dozing off when my two roommates come in to go to sleep so they unknowingly wake me up.)

Roommate #1: *Quietly* “Shhh, [My Name]’s sleeping.”

Roommate #2: “Okay.”

(Roommate #2 then has to walk next to my bed to grab something out of her bag and I just can’t resist grabbing her leg…)

Roommate #2: “AHHHHH!”

Roommate #1: “What the actual f***!?”

(I couldn’t help but to cackle while Roommate #2 smacked me for “scaring the s*** out of her.”)

(My friend is talking to her sister. The friend has recently developed a major crush on a character from a TV show we both like, who is heavily associated with the color blue. A few days before this, she purchased a long tube full of blue raspberry pucker powder. Her sister has gotten her a blue raspberry slushie and I’ve said something along the lines of “Oh no.”)

Friend: “[Sister], you’re giving [my name] flashbacks of the last time I had something blue and sugary in my body.”

Friend’s Sister: “What, [character]?”

Friend: “No, the pucker powder.” *realizes what she said and starts laughing* “Oh, I WISH!”

(My boyfriend and I are doing housework and trying to get Alexa to play some music. JT Music is a rap artist whose songs mostly regard video game characters.

Boyfriend: Alexa, play JT Music.
Alexa: Shuffling songs by Justin Timberlake.
Me: (laughing) That’s the same thing that happened to me!
Boyfriend: Alexa, never play Justin Timberlake again!
Alexa: Baby Shark-
Boyfriend and Me: NO!!!

I was working self check 1 day and 1 of the signature pads would only work with stylus pen only. Unfortunately we can’t put up a sign to tell the customers that (corporate rules). I’m calling this customer Man Baby. MB used that SC and yelled that the screen had frozen. So I told him to use the stylus. MB yelled at me “Don’t talk to me like a child!” I apologized but he kept going on “I’m a grown ass man don’t talk to me like an infant!”. He then storms out of the store. The customer at the SC machine in front of me said “stop throwing public temper tantrums then!”