(I work in a small brick-and-mortar bookstore in my town. We hire a new guy, who only lasts for three days because enough staff complain about him. I only work one day with him, but he gets fired the next day after exchanges like this.)

New Guy: “I seriously don’t understand why people buy books anymore.”

Me: “Then why do you work in a bookstore?”

New Guy: “No, no, no. I like books; I just don’t see why other people like them.”

Me: “Are you kidding?”

New Guy: “Well, when [Manager] asked me in my interview if I read books, I told her lots, but I think the last physical book I read was Death Note back in 2003.”

Me: “Death Note didn’t get published in North America until 2005.”

New Guy: “Huh. It was more recently than I thought; 2005 is pretty good.”

Me: “That was 12 years ago.”

New Guy: “Well, do you read all the time, then? When did you last finish a book?”

Me: “I am currently reading Universal Harvester—” *which is in my hands* “—and I just finished reading Misery by Stephen King a week or two ago.”

New Guy: “So, is, like, everyone here book people?”

Me: “YES! THAT’S WHY WE WORK IN A BOOKSTORE!”

New Guy: “Oh. I’m just here because I need money, and it looked like you guys didn’t do anything. I played video games professionally for the last seven years, so I like not having to work that much.”

Me: “You are in the wrong place, then, man.”

New Guy: “That’s what they told me when I flunked out of computer science. I still told them all to go eff themselves.”

(I work at the public library, and the patrons sometimes need help with the computers, printing, making copies, etc. I’m called over to help a college-aged girl print out her resume when I look at the screen and notices it’s only two lines: the girl’s name and university.)

Girl: “So, can I print this out now?”

Me: *with some hesitation* “Are you sure you don’t want to add anything else to it? Have you had any work experience?”

Girl: “No, just my degree.”

Me: “How about volunteer experience? Leadership positions?”

Girl: *blank stare*

(I tried again with a few other suggestions, figuring anything was better than the current two-line resume. Each time she just stared and asked if she should print it out now. Finally, I gave up. The kicker? That resume was going to be attached to a job application… for a position at the library.)

(I graduated a little over a year prior to this story, and have recently moved back to my university town to live with my fiancé who is still studying, so I’m looking for a job. I see a sign in a window for waitressing and submit my CV, which has my degree, when I graduated, and work history, including the full time job I held last. My personal statement also mentions my time at the university. I get called in for interview.)

Interviewer: “Hi, [My Name], thank you for coming.”

Me: “Thank you for giving me the opportunity to interview.”

Interviewer: “So, what experience do you have in this area?”

Me: “I worked in [Cafe] in Bristol full time last year where my duties included cleaning, making coffee, and preparing sandwiches. I was split between two of their branches and a key holder for both.”

Interviewer: “That’s brilliant. And do you have your timetable yet?”

Me: “I’m sorry, what timetable?”

Interviewer: “Your lecture timetable.”

Me: “I’m not a student. I graduated from [University] last year.”

Interviewer: “Oh, okay. Well, this job is only really suitable for students. We’re only offering six-eight hours a week, you know.”

(Nowhere on the ‘job vacancy’ sign in the window did it say this.)

Me: “You’re right, that doesn’t suit me. Thank you anyway.”

Interviewer: “You really should put that you aren’t a student on your CV in this town. It would have saved both of us wasting our time.”

(What I wanted to point out was that I did, and that maybe putting the hours on the sign, or at least that it’s part time, would be a good idea too. But I bit my tongue, smiled and left. My next interview went better; they actually read my CV for one thing.)

(Shortly after college, I got a job as a receptionist at a small, local company. My desk was right inside the front door, in an area completely walled-off from the rest of the building, and separated by one door with a key-card lock. Walk-in appointments were never allowed, so I would take all the messages and deliveries for every employee in the main office behind me. One afternoon, less than a half hour before closing, a college student comes in, dressed professionally, and carrying a folder.)

Student: “I saw your company was hiring interns, and I’d like to drop off my resume.”

Me: “Sure, I can take that and pass it on to HR.”

Student: “I’d like to speak to someone about it before I drop it off.”

Me: “Well, since it’s so late in the afternoon, our HR staff has actually already left for the day. But they’ll get your paperwork first thing in the morning.”

Student: “Can I see someone in charge of the position I’m applying for?”

Me: “He’s actually out of the office, too, I’m afraid.”

Student: “I need to speak to someone I can leave my resume with.”

Me: “You can leave it with me, and I’ll personally set it on our HR head’s desk, and double-check tomorrow morning to make sure she reviews it.”

Student: “Can I speak to someone in charge of hiring?”

(At this point, I can tell he’s not going to leave, even though I can’t give him a walk-in appointment, and even if I could, there is no one currently in the building who would have anything to do with hiring interns. To appease him, I message a coworker in the back to see if anyone from HR stayed late, even though I can see by their IM statuses that they’re all offline. The reply I receive confirms that the entire department is gone already.)

Me: “I’m sorry, everyone in HR has definitely already left for the day. But I go right by their desks on my way out, so I can leave your resume there with a note and your contact information. They’ll get it first thing in the morning.”

Student: “Can I talk to someone that I can leave my resume with?”

Me: “No one’s available right now. It’s the end of the day, and no one’s still here from HR. But I take all their messages and deliveries and I can promise you I’ll have it on the HR head’s desk before I leave tonight.”

Student: “Can I see someone in charge of hiring so I can leave my resume?”

(This continues for several minutes. Finally, in sheer desperation, I let myself into the main office, and grab the first person I see and quickly fill him in on the situation. I drag my poor, bewildered coworker out to the front, where he (finally!) successfully takes the student’s resume. The student, finally satisfied, says a quick “thank you” and hurries out of the office.)

Me: “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know what to do! He wouldn’t leave the building until he’d personally handed that to someone besides me!”

Coworker: “No problem. I’ll give this to HR in the morning, but it’s safe to say they’re not going to hire him after they hear about how he dropped this off!”

(We never did hire him. I hope he eventually learned that it’s possible to be TOO persistent when trying to impress a potential employer!)

(I’m applying for a job at a large pet store chain. I am very qualified for the position. Three weeks after handing in my resume I get a call from the store, right before I’m about to go out of province for a week for a family wedding.)

Manager: “Hello! I’m calling about your resume. I read it over and frankly, you are exactly what we’re looking for! I’d love for you to come in for an interview. I’m actually away for the next three days but could you come in Thursday?”

Me: “Thank you so much. I’m so glad to hear from you! Unfortunately, I will be out of province for a week. Is there any way we can do a phone interview?”

Manager: “Oh, no worries at all! Just give us a call when you get back. We’d really like to interview you before we offer this job to anyone else.”

Me: *getting excited as this job is in my field of interest and would be good experience* “Thank you! I’ll call you back as soon as I get back to Ontario!”

(The day I get back I give the store a call. I’m informed that the manager is off sick but they’ll pass along that I had called. I wait a day or two and hear nothing so call again. This time she’s there.)

Manager: *sounding slightly annoyed* “Thanks for following up. I was about to call you.”

Me: “Of course. I hope you’re feeling better! I’m back in town now and I was hoping we could still set up that interview!”

Manager: “I have to rearrange my schedule a bit; being off sick has set me back. I’ll call you back with a day and time! If you don’t hear from me in a week give me a call!”

Me: *thinking a week is a long time but still optimistic* “Great, thanks!”

(A week went by and nothing, so I called as requested. I’m told she’s sick again. I call a few days later and am told she was busy and they’d pass on the message. This continued for another week. She never called me and by that point I stop calling. I get that my going out of province probably put me out of the running for the job, but she could have told me that rather than string me along. Luckily I got another job shortly after that was seasonal but also a HUGE boost to my resume!)