(I work at an electronics retail store where we check receipts. It’s 20 minutes past closing time and I have to stand by the electronic doors and open them manually. A middle-aged couple approaches me with a 50-inch television.)

Wife: “We’re going to need someone to load the TV into our car. My husband has a problem with his arm.”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am. I’ll have to try and get someone’s attention, as I can’t leave my spot here. We’re closing right now so we don’t have very many employees at the moment.”

Husband: “I need someone now. My arm is messed up and I can’t lift the TV, so go get someone.”

Me: “I understand that, sir. I will find someone for you, but you have to understand that I cannot leave this area as I have to guard the door.”

(I begin scoping the area to find an employee that can load the TV for them when I hear them talking about me in Spanish. I am very pale and white, but I’m fluent in Spanish.)

Wife: *in Spanish* “She’s just being lazy. She could leave if she wanted to. Retail workers are unbelievable.”

(After two minutes, I manage to get someone’s attention from the parking lot. I turn back to the couple, who are still insulting me.)

Me: *in Spanish* “Excuse me, that gentleman in the parking lot would be glad to assist you.”

(Their faces go white and they rush out of the store. My coworker, who has just joined me, speaks up.)

Coworker: “That’s golden.”

(A coworker of mine decides to volunteer by becoming the fundraising director for the local music festival. One day, I hear a commotion from down the hall. I poke my head out of the office to see this new coworker very loudly berating my boss.)

Coworker: “I can’t BELIEVE this station has never donated to the music festival! After all this festival has done for the station… all the money they’ve spent here… and we’ve never given back? I’m EMBARRASSED to be working here!”

(The boss seems beside herself, so I speak up.)

Me: “Excuse me, but I’ve been here a lot longer than you, and we’ve always been a sponsor of the festival. Did you not see the certificates in the lobby?”

(In our lobby, we have certificates of appreciation from the festival, thanking us for sponsoring them. They go back for the last 10 years.)

Coworker: “Well, I don’t see one for last year! What the f*** did we do, take last year off?”

Me: “There was a paperwork snafu last year, and we never received our certificate. But yes, we did sponsor the festival last year.”

Coworker: “Oh yeah?! PROVE IT!”

(I go to the nearest computer and bring up the station website, and show my coworker all of the pictures from the festival last year. All over the festival site are signs saying, “Proudly sponsored by [our station]”.)

Coworker: “Well… well… I wasn’t here last year! How did you expect me to know?!”

(He stormed back to his office. Why he wasn’t fired on the spot, I’ll never know.)

(It is Black Friday. I am waiting with my friend in a queue that wraps all the way around the store. After 45 minutes, we are almost to the front. A nearby rack catches my eye, and since I’m not purchasing anything, I step out of line. My friend and the customer in front of her watch me hold a sweater up.)

Me: *to my friend* “Hey, do you think this sweater’s cute? It’s the last one!”

Friend: “Definitely. I’ll hold your purse while you try it on!”

(I step away to remove my purse. Suddenly, the customer who’s been watching me dashes over, rips the sweater from my hands, and tries to duck right back into line!)

Customer: “Haha, sorry! Guess you weren’t fast enough!”

Friend: “Are you kidding me? I’m not going to fight you for that sweater, but there’s no way you’re cutting back in front of me.”

Customer: “Whatever. I didn’t even leave the line.”

(A nearby employee, who has seen the entire exchange, speaks up before I can say another word.)

Employee: *to the customer* “Ma’am, I just saw you step out of line. You need to go to the back of the queue.”

Customer: “No way! I’ve been waiting forever! It’ll take me another hour to check out!”

Employee: “If it were up to me, I wouldn’t let you buy anything from us at all!”

(The customer stomps all the way to the back of the store.)

Friend and Me: *to the customer* “Haha, sorry! Guess you just weren’t quick enough!”

This story is part of our Black Friday roundup!

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(I work at a table that is set up at a farmer’s market every Sunday where I sell different deli meats. I also cater events and I am speaking to a couple in their 30s about possibly catering an engagement party. I am a caucasian female in my 20s.)

Me: “So, I can give you my business card if you’d like to discuss the options for your engagement party.”

Woman: “Sure, thanks!”

Man: “You’ve been so helpful!” *looks at name on business card* “Morgan Freeman? Are you seriously Morgan Freeman?”

Me: “Well, yes. That’s my name.”

Woman: “Are you the actor?”

Me: *laughing* “Haha, only on weekdays!”

Man: “No she’s not. What a liar! This is bulls***. You’re not Morgan Freeman!”

Woman: “Honey, it says right there on the card. So, are you the one that does all the narration? Like for the penguin movies?”

Man: “She’s a liar. We’re leaving.”

Me: “No. I’m not the African American male actor. But anyway, my email and phone number are on there for my catering business.”

Man: “Sorry, we don’t deal with liars.”

(He hauls his fiancée away.)

Woman: *turns around and literally yells* “DO YOU KNOW OPRAH?!”

(I’m working at my zoo’s snack shack. I have to clean the popcorn machine a bit before closing, or else I won’t be done by quitting time. This is approved by my supervisor.)

Woman: “Miss, I need some—oh, did you not make popcorn today?”

Me: “Well, I cleaned out the machine, but it’s bagged so they can use it for the animals tomorrow.”

Woman: “Can I still buy it?” *glances at her two very young children* “I’d have come earlier but they weren’t hungry yet. However, they are dead-set on popcorn.”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s probably cold. Really cold.”

Woman: “I don’t care dear. How much? How’s five dollars?”

Me: “I really think there’s only two dollars with in the bag.”

Woman: “You get five for being so sweet!”

(I ring it up as two anyway, and let her put the change in the donation jar since we don’t take tips. The kids happily take the cold popcorn and start chowing down.)

Woman: “You’re a lifesaver, sweetie! And such good service!”

(When I take the ‘take-up’ to the gift shop, I see the woman with her kids, still eating the popcorn.)

Manager: “Good job. She’s really happy. Bought a mess of merchandise to thank us for hiring ‘such a nice girl!'”

(Both the kids hugged me on my way back out, too!)