Absolute Power Gets Uppity Absolutely

(A coworker of mine decides to volunteer by becoming the fundraising director for the local music festival. One day, I hear a commotion from down the hall. I poke my head out of the office to see this new coworker very loudly berating my boss.)

Coworker: “I can’t BELIEVE this station has never donated to the music festival! After all this festival has done for the station… all the money they’ve spent here… and we’ve never given back? I’m EMBARRASSED to be working here!”

(The boss seems beside herself, so I speak up.)

Me: “Excuse me, but I’ve been here a lot longer than you, and we’ve always been a sponsor of the festival. Did you not see the certificates in the lobby?”

(In our lobby, we have certificates of appreciation from the festival, thanking us for sponsoring them. They go back for the last 10 years.)

Coworker: “Well, I don’t see one for last year! What the f*** did we do, take last year off?”

Me: “There was a paperwork snafu last year, and we never received our certificate. But yes, we did sponsor the festival last year.”

Coworker: “Oh yeah?! PROVE IT!”

(I go to the nearest computer and bring up the station website, and show my coworker all of the pictures from the festival last year. All over the festival site are signs saying, “Proudly sponsored by [our station]”.)

Coworker: “Well… well… I wasn’t here last year! How did you expect me to know?!”

(He stormed back to his office. Why he wasn’t fired on the spot, I’ll never know.)