I’m usually a humble person. I don’t demand attention or cooperation of I can help myself. One time I went to a new supermarket (and I do that scarcely, because I find most of my need in the neighborhood shops) and I was wearing my fancy suit for some reason I don’t remember now. The employees probably thought I’m someone important and jumped to help me and almost do everything for me. Now I don’t now if it was the suit or they do that for everyone, but I was treated like a king for a solid 15 minutes and sent on my merry way with many thanks. At the end I felt kind of sad for them to have to bow to people that much. I couldn’t imagine what kind of behaviour they had witnessed to have them stand on tiptoe. So on behalf of all that who don’t, thank you retail workers!

When smalltalking about people taking stuff far too literally:

Me: *Dryly* ‘Yeah, that line of reasoning is a little bit autistic, if you know what I mean…’

Coworker: ‘Don’t dismiss all autistic people. There are very smart ones amongst them!’

Me: ‘Erm… No need to tell me. I know several autistic people.’

Let’s see… Several of my friends, many of my wife’s friends, including her best friends, relatives of all mentioned friends, my wife herself, my uncle, my twin brother… Oh, and last but not least: me.

Some bosses are full of themselves AND full of sh*t. For instance when they do not want a hierarchy on the workfloor, but actually they do.

Owner: ‘So, I think we should actually have A-employees and AA-employees.’

Yeah, why call it A and B or junior and senior? Why use something that makes sense? Luckily, the plan was so vague and clumsy that it didn’t come to fruition before I left anyway.

Later I heard that had called the distinction junior and senior after all. Of course, he was appointing people as senior without consulting anyone, purely based on personal preference and whim. Lower management mostly ignored it therefore.

(Last august, with the help of my supportive partners, i came to the realization that i was trans. On my online platform i have my family blocked who isnt very supportive, but i could be myself there. I started to dress the way i wanted and be myself. I apparently missed blocking family on my one partners account.
In october our one partner moved to where we live with his kids intending to live with us and our son as a family, we had to wait for me to talk to my parents and convince them it was time for them to get their own apartment and live their adult years together with out the supervision kf their 26 year old child.
Its important to note my mom had a cancer scare a few years ago and this particular day she was having a check up to make sure the cancer was gone. Both my partners and all three of our kids and i were at the temporary home of partner B. I got a frantic call from my mom telling me to come home because there were somethings we needed to discuss. I was upset and crying the whole way home thinking i was about to find out my moms cancer was back.
When we walked inside she immediately started crying and yelling asking why i would lie to her and how disrespected and ashamed she was that i didnt feel comfortable coming out as a transgendered individual to her or that partner A and i had a second partner who moved down. Needless to say i lost my mom that day. She invaded my privacy, played victim, forced me into an uncomfortable situation, and repeatedly told me how she feels like her “baby had died”.

The story isnt all bad though, her and my step dad did move out a few months later. Currently our three kids are asleep in bed and were all cuddled up. Were happy and im starting HRT soon with the help of partner B and the encouragement and love and support of both my loves and my grandma, who loves her new “grandson-in-law” and two new great grandkids.)

We’re keeping our cat inside while he recovers from an injured foot. At night, my mom comes storming out of her room.

Mom: [my name], come get your cat! He’s being completely crazy!

Me: (worried) Oh? Maybe we shouldn’t give him any more pain pills for a while, then…

Mom: Not the cat! Your father! He’s drinking out of the toilet!

Me: DAD?!?!

Mom: No! The cat!