I was working at a medical post, that is managed by a larger organisation. They had placed ads that had incorrect details. We had been getting a few persons turning up at our post, that had gone to the incorrect one. I could certainly understand their annoyance, and I apologised for it and got them through the service as quickly as possible.

This client was really annoyed though, and I still don’t blame him:

Me: “Good morning, are you here for [ad]?”

Client: *Immediate rant.* “Yes! Listen you guys have to get yourselves together! I went to two other places this morning and they were closed! This is how you treat us?!”

At this point, I realise he is more upset than the others. Still, I accept it as my company’s fault and am not ruffled. Best I let him talk his peace as he won’t tolerate hearing any excuses, right?

Client: “Up and down, all over the place. You must do better. Look at me. Sweating. All these people behind me are also coming from the other location!”

Me: *He takes a breath, so I dive in.* “I am very sorry about that, sir, and you are correct. If you’ll take this form, we can get you sorted and out in twenty minutes.”

Client: *Looks at me, then the form.* “You’re not going to give me some reasons why this happened?”

Me: *Taken aback.* “Oh. Sorry. Yes. Well, there were actually three things—”

Client: “—See! I knew it. Just want to give a bunch of excuses!” *Takes the form and walks off.*

Our clinic had been helping a large group of last-minute persons with a service required for them to travel. It had been going well, given the number of them. 

One lady, for whom the company had not sent the proper documents, was getting upset and unreasonable. We couldn’t assist her without the documents, and we were awaiting them. As we dealt with her increasingly unfair commentary:

Client: “I have the receipt. What now?”

I look at the chair in front of the officer who would need to assist her and see that another client is already being seen. There are no other officers available.

Me: *Making sure to keep my voice light and polite given the history.* “Okay, great! Please have a seat up front—” *Points to an empty waiting chair at the front.* “—and you will be the very next person.” *Points to the client being assisted.*

Client: “Why do I have to wait? I’m with the [group].”

Me: *Looks back at the chair.* “This person, also from [group], is being assisted now. As soon as they leave the chair, you will be next.”

Client: “I feel I am being targeted.” *Looks at me pointedly.*

Me: *At my end.* “Ms [Her Name], we don’t know you that well or like that, and we just wouldn’t.”

I walked away. Not my best answer, but I was so tired of her!

I run tours around the area from a fancy resort in Jamaica. One of the tours is the exploration of a cave by the beach, which involves a little bit of swimming. I meet the tour group the night before at the resort and explain how it all works.

In the morning, I meet the tour group on the beach and hand out life jackets. A middle-aged woman not dressed for getting wet looks up from her phone, and she seems confused.

Tourist: “What is this for?”

Me: “For the cave swim tour, ma’am.”

Tourist: “You never told me we would have to swim!”

Me: “I explained at the resort that the tour involved exploring swimming into a cave.”

Tourist: “You should have been clearer!”

Me: “Ma’am, the tour is for the exploration of a natural cave that can only be accessed through the ocean. The name of the tour is the ‘Cave Swim Tour’. I don’t know how much clearer I could have been.”

Tourist: “I thought there would be like a guest path or something! What if I needed to use the restroom or stop for a coffee?” 

Me: “…I don’t think this is the tour for you, ma’am.”

(I am going to visit my uncle who lives in an assisted living complex. I am about to turn into the driveway, but there is a lady with an umbrella standing in the middle of the driveway. She sees me indicating and turning to go into the driveway but does not move. Thus, to enter the driveway, I have to manoeuvre the car around her, as to avoid her. I do and, unfortunately, my rear left tyre goes into a shallow pothole. As the pothole is not deep enough to cause any damage to the car or tyre, I drive onwards to the gate where I have to wait for the staff to open the gate to let me in. While I’m waiting, I hear a hard knock on my window; it’s the lady I had to drive around. Figuring she may want a lift, I wind down my glass, only to have her scream at me.)

Lady: “YOU SPLASHED ME AND RUINED MY PANTS!”

Me: *confused look*

Lady: “LOOK AT MY PANTS; THEY’RE RUINED!”

Me: “When did this happen?”

Lady: “When you drove up the driveway.”

Me: “Oh, you mean when the rear of the car went down in the pothole, when I drove around you to get up here?”

Lady: “YES!”

Me: “Well, next time, don’t stand in the middle of a driveway near a water-filled pothole.”

Lady: “YOU IGNORANT YOUNG BOY, MY PANTS ARE RUINED!”

Me: “Well, I’m smart enough to know not to stand in the middle of a driveway where vehicles are passing, and to wait on the pavement for a taxi rather than where you were.”

Lady: “YOU ARE BEING SO IGNORANT!”

(By the time she started her rant again, the gate had opened and I wound up my glass and drove into the complex. Seriously, people, look at your surroundings when you are waiting for transportation. Don’t stand in the middle of a driveway or entrance, move away from large puddles of water, and stay on the edge of the pavement furthest from the road. As a pedestrian, you have to think of your safety first!)

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to rent a car, but can I drive it to the United States?”

Me: “Pardon? I don’t understand.”

Customer: “Can I drive the car back to the United States?”

Me: “How did you get to Jamaica?”

Customer: “I flew here, why?”

Me: “Didn’t you see the ocean underneath you from the airplane?”

Customer: “No, I slept the whole way here. Wait. What ocean?”