What What It’s A Butt

(A mother comes in looking to get a hamster for her four children. They range in age from 3 to 10.)

Mother:  “Excuse me, miss?”

Me:  “How may I help you?”

Mother:  “Can you tell me if this hamster is a girl?”

(I look at the hamster in question. It’s most definitely male.)

Mother, to me: *quietly* “Just say it’s a girl.”

Me: “Yes, it’s a girl.”

Mother, to children: “Yes, this one’s a girl. We can call her Jessie.”

Child:  “What’s that hanging off the back of the hamster?” *points to the hamster’s prominent testicles*

Mother: *looks at me in desperation*

Me:  “Er…that’s…”

Mother:  *frantic look of desperation*

Me:  “…its butt.”

Mother:  *look of relief*

(They ended up buying the hamster in spite of its large…butt.)