You May Want To Burn Your Phone After Reading This

CONTENT WARNING: Gross

This guy at my last job was hard to be around; even twenty feet away from him, you could still smell him. Thankfully, I didn’t have to sit anywhere near him, but those who did complained all the time to the floor manager. His body odor was so bad. I don’t know if he just soiled himself and kept wearing the same underwear or something, but he constantly reeked like he had just gone swimming in a feces-filled toilet.

It probably didn’t help that the guy’s car was literally filled with garbage; fast food wrappers and trash filled every part of his car except for the driver’s seat. It also probably didn’t help that he ate like a pig — literally. He would literally hold food in his hands and eat from them like he was dining in a trough. He’d get food all over his face and hands, and then he’d wipe his face and hands on his shirt to “clean” them off.

His keyboard was greasy; we could actually see the grease buildup on the keys from all of the crap he ate. The microphone headset he wore was physically turning orange from all the Cheeto dust he’d get on his hands, and it would transfer onto his headset from him handling it so much.

It gets worse.

His cubicle walls were covered in snot and boogers; he would wipe his finger on the walls after digging in his nose while he was on calls with customers.

Human Resources had to talk to him multiple times about his lack of hygiene. Usually, after the HR lady spoke to him, he would at least stop coming in and smelling like he had soiled himself, but that would only last for so long.

Management kept him around because he was good at his job. (He really wasn’t; he just found easy ways to pad his numbers for the help desk.) Once a proper floor manager came in and created a proper metric system, this guy couldn’t pad his numbers anymore, and they fired him.

After they fired him the floor manager and the maintenance team disassembled his cubicle, and they threw out the walls because of how much snot and boogers were all over them.

Now that I think about it, they actually threw out everything that was in his cubicle because of the health hazard that it was.