(We had a bad storm the night before that disconnected our store’s internet which is used for the credit cards. We have signs posted on the doors and on the registers that we cannot accept credit or debit cards. We can accept only cash or checks.)

Me: “Hello. Is this for here or to go?”

Customer: “For here. I’d like to use these coupons.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I ring up his order which comes to around $35 even with the coupons. He hands me a debit card.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. We cannot accept cards at the moment.”

Customer: “Well. I guess I’ll have to go elsewhere.”

Me: “Okay, sir. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

Customer: “Y’all need to have signs up for that.”

Me: “You walked past two when you walked in, sir, and there’s one right there in your face.”

Customer: *shamefully walks out*

(I’m meeting my family for dinner after my work shift. Because my job is close to the restaurant, I just go there straight from work.)

Hostess: “Hi. Welcome to [Restaurant]! How many?”

Me: “My family has a reservation for tonight, but I’m early.”

Hostess: “No problem. Would you like to sit at your table while you wait?”

Me: “Thanks, but I can wait here. Could I use the restroom, though?”

Hostess: “Sure! It’s right through there.”

(I use the facilities and return a few minutes later.)

Hostess: *brightly* “And how was everything?”

(We stop and stare at each other as she realizes what she’s asked me. We both crack up laughing.)

Me: “Everything was great!”

(I work in a South American restaurant that tends to get a lot of Asian customers. Since I’m fluent in Mandarin Chinese, Korean, Khmer [Cambodian], and Tagalog [Philippines], I’m often called on to serve customers who don’t speak English. A group of seven customers come in.)

Customer #1: *obviously struggling* “Can… I… has this?”

Me: *taking a guess* *Mandarin* “Would you be more comfortable in Mandarin?”

Customer #2: *Korean* “Stupid Mexicans. Can’t even tell the difference between a Korean and a Chinese man.”

Me: *Korean* “I apologize, ma’am. I guessed based on [Customer #1]’s accent and it seems I was wrong. Can I take your order now?”

Customer #3: *English* “No. I want to talk to your manager.”

(I go back to get the manager, who is Peruvian.)

Manager: “Can I help you?

Customer #3: “Yes. I want to complain about your Mexican waiter’s horribly racist demeanor.”

Manager: “How was he being racist? He’s usually very culturally sensitive.”

Customer #4: “You Mexicans are all the same, never bothering to think that maybe there are more types of Asians than just Chinese people.”

Manager: “First of all, your waiter is from Puerto Rico. I’m from Peru. So maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to complain about being unable to differentiate ethnicity.”

Customer #3: “I don’t see what that has to do with anything.”

(Sighing, my manager assigns a Chinese-American waiter to them. He can only speak English and ends up having to have customers 3 and 4 translate for the rest of their table in order to get their order. Amazingly, they never complained about the difficulty in ordering.)

Did you find this story using our Waitstaff roundup?

Click here to get to the next story!

Click here to get back to the roundup!

(I work in a Mexican restaurant. I’m getting the drink order.)

Customer: “I’ll have a sweet tea.”

Me: “I’m sorry. We only have unsweetened tea, but we have different sweeteners available at the table here.”

Customer: “Not having sweet tea is un-American!”

Me: “Sir, this is a Mexican restaurant.”

Customer: “…touché.”

This story is part of the Mexican Restaurant roundup!

Read the next Mexican Restaurant roundup story!

Read the Mexican Restaurant roundup!

(A waitress is taking my father-in-law’s order, which comes with a choice of side dish.)

Waitress: “And what would you like, sir?”

Father-In-Law: “Filet mignon, please.”

Waitress: “And how would you like that cooked?”

Father-In-Law: “Medium, please.”

Waitress: “And which side?”

Father-In-Law: “Both.”