Customer: “What the f****; you shortchanged me!”

Me: “Ma’am, I gave you the exact amount of change that is on the receipt.”

Customer: “BULLS***! YOU SHORTCHANGED ME YOU STUPID LITTLE F***! I DEMAND THAT YOU GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK RIGHT NOW!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I will go get a manager for you right away.”

Customer: “F*** YOU, YOU LITTLE PIECE OH S***! I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. YOU WILL PAY!”

(At this point the customer began to storm down the aisles. She lit a cigarette and began setting merchandise on fire. Afterward, she ran from the store because she realized that she had in fact had gotten the right amount of change!)

This story is part of the Customers-Overreacting roundup!

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Me: “Congratulations! Because you’ve spent over $30 on our beauty products you can receive a complimentary tote bag. Would you like it in black or brown?”

Customer: “What’s a tote bag?”

Me: *holds up bag* “It’s a bag. Rather large… You can put things in it. It comes in black or brown.”

Customer: “Oh, well, that’s nifty, isn’t it?”

Me: “Yes, it is, ma’am. Would you like it in black or brown?”

Customer: “How much does that cost?”

Me: “Normally, $14.99, but yours is complimentary because you spent over $30 on beauty products.”

Customer: “Oh, I wouldn’t pay $15 for that!”

Me: “You don’t have to pay for it.”

Customer: “Why not?”

(Other customers are beginning to become aggravated by this woman’s stupidity so I call up another cashier.)

Me: “…because it’s complimentary.”

Customer: “Oh, why’d you call up [Coworker]?”

Me: “Because the other customers are waiting.”

Customer: “Waiting for what?”

Me: “Waiting to pay for their items. Now, would you like your free bag or not?”

Customer: “I don’t like your tone, young lady!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I’m just a little late for my break. Now, would you like your FREE tote bag?”

Customer: “Oh, it’s free?”

(This exchange went on for about ten more minutes, as the woman had to go through about five different cards until she found one she could use… making me fifteen minutes late for my fifteen minute break. Rest assured, she eventually learned the meaning of complimentary.)