Some Transparency Required When Selling This Product

(My father and I are customers in this story. He and I are running errands and stop into a local paint shop looking for a particular type of wood stain. We make our selection and make our way to the registers. Just as we reach the counter, a woman rushes up with a handful of items — rollers, trays, etc. — and drops them on the counter. One of the items she’s placed on the counter is a gallon of clear wood sealant, the packaging of which has “TRANSPARENT VARNISH” in large block letters.)

Woman: “I need to return this. I put two coats of this on my front deck and it doesn’t look like I’ve done anything!”

Cashier: “Well, you only really to apply one coat of this.”

Woman: “I know! But I put this on my deck, and it doesn’t look like I’ve changed anything! It still looks the same!”

Cashier: “Well, it’s clear varnish.”

Woman: “Well, can I exchange this for something darker?”

Cashier: “Um… Sure.”

Woman: “Here, I’ll show you.” *starts scrolling through her phone* “I know you believe me, but it doesn’t look like I’ve done anything after putting this on.”

(By that time, my father and I had purchased our wood stain and left the store. We laughed for a good ten minutes about the whole exchange. If she purchased transparent wood sealant, what did she think was going to happen? Was she expecting the clear varnish to turn her deck black?)