(We get shipments of product about once a week. They arrive in our store on wooden skids, with all of the boxes wrapped up in plastic. It is the driver’s/delivery guy’s responsibility to unload the boxes off the skid and take the wooden skid away since our small store has nowhere to store them or dispose of them. I am a short woman, working alone, and two skids arrive. I begin unpacking the first skid to speed things up while the driver gets the second one. He returns and simply stands there watching me lifting the heavy boxes off the six-foot high pile.)

Driver: “Where do you want this second skid? You’re store is really small.”

Me: “Well, if you help me unload this skid and take the wooden skid away we can put it here.”

Driver: *after staring at me silently for a moment* “Ya, okay.”

(We unload the skid together and he gets the second one into place. It is very poorly packed, with all of the heaviest boxes placed on top of the lighter ones, virtually crushing the bottom boxes and resulting in a very pronounced, worrisome lean.)

Driver: “Okay, here’s the second one. See ya.”

(Before I could ask where he was going he took off, leaving me alone to unpack the extremely unsafe mountain of boxes and find a place to store the wooden skid. Thanks for the help!)

(I work in a video store. This is years before gift cards. We have to hand-write the amount on a certificate.)

Customer: “That is not spelled right.”

Employee #1: *writes void on certificate, and tries again*

Customer: “It’s still not right.”

(Employee #1 calls over Employee #2.)

Employee #2: “Ma’am, I’m sure that’s right.”

Customer: *agitated* “I demand to speak to a manager.”

(I come over.)

Me: “Ma’am, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I need this certificate for $12 and he keeps spelling it wrong.”

Me: “Okay. What is the amount of the gift certificate?”

Employee #1: “$12.”

Me: “How did you spell it?”

Employee #1 & #2: “T-W-E-L-V-E.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not the greatest speller, but I’m pretty sure that’s right.”

Customer: “Well, it’s not.”

Me: “So that we don’t waste anymore gift certificates, why don’t you write the amount?”

(The customer snatches the booklet and pen, and starts to fill in the information. When she gets to the amount she stops, confusion on her face.)

Customer: “How did you spell it again?”

Employee #1: “T-W-E-L-V-E.”

Customer: “Oh. I guess you were right…”

(I’m working in the child-watch section of the gym, where people leave their kids while they go work out. Normally it’s not too bad, but today it is just me and one other person and we have three kids less than a year old in addition to other kids. After a while, I finally manage to get two of them to sleep and some of the older kids come over to watch them.)

Girl: “Her nails are so little and cute. We’d need just a drop of nail polish to color them. Can we paint her nails?”

(I am stunned so I blurt the first thing that comes to mind.)

Me: “No modifications made to the baby without her parent present.”

Girl: “Huh?”

Me: “No, you can’t paint her nails.”

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(It is our second last year of high school and two of my friends are standing in the corridor, talking. Friend #1 can be a bit blonde sometimes. During this instance, one of the other students had thrown a firecracker inside one of the dustbins around school. My friends are talking near it when it suddenly explodes, giving them both a fright.)

Friend #1: “Oh, my God! Somebody shot me!”

Friend #2: “Calm down, [Friend #1]. It was the dustbin.”

Friend #1: “The dustbin shot me?!”

(My church is very small, so we rent a building just under a mile away for our youth group. My friend is 17 and has his license and a car.)

Friend: “Can I go get the basketball hoop from the church?”

Youth Leader: “Sure.”

(About 20 minutes later my friend has not returned.)

Youth Leader: “Where’s [Friend]?”

11-Year-Old Youth Member: “He ran to the church to get the basketball hoop.”

Youth Leader: “He should have been back by now.”

(My youth leader then went outside to see if my friend was coming. It turned out that my friend literally ran to the church and was carrying the basketball hoop back to the youth building. He was stopped by a police officer who thought that the hoop was stolen. My youth leader had to explain the situation to the officer.)