Let’s Get Dangerous!

At The Checkout, Awesome, Bad Behavior, Retail, USA | Right | July 27, 2021

I am wearing a Darkwing Duck T-shirt. The shirt doesn’t actually mention Darkwing by name or feature his likeness, but it does mention St. Canard, the name of the fictional city the show is set in. I’m male and in my early forties.

I am at the store and go to the register with my cart. The clerk is a young man in his late twenties with flamboyant hair and a small nose piercing. I unload the items onto the belt, and as the previous customer takes their shopping and walks away, the clerk turns to me and notices my shirt.

Clerk: “Hey, nice shirt! I love that show!”

Me: “Thanks! You’re the first person to—”

Rude Customer: *Behind me* “WILL YOU STOP F****** CHATTING AND GET MOVING?! Some of us have THINGS TO DO!”

This outburst is a bit random as it has literally only been a few seconds since the previous customer left. The clerk starts scanning my items, but the rude customer gets even angrier.

Rude Customer: “HURRY UP!”

It has been less than a minute since we started.

Rude Customer: “F****** f**s keeping me waiting!”

The clerk just looks at me, winks, and turns to the rude customer.

Clerk: “I am the terror that flaps in the night. I am the cashier doing his job and won’t tolerate rudeness. I am… refusing you service!”

The customer starts screaming, but luckily, a passing manager has heard everything and with the help of the security guard is able to get the rude customer out of the store. My items are bagged and I pay and am ready to go.

Me: “Thanks, DW!”

Clerk: “Never fear, citizen! The Clerk of St. Canard will always protect you!”

Best clerk ever!

This story is part of our Best Of July 2021 roundup!