If You Go Hard, I Can Go Harder

A table is almost finished with their meal. One of the older patriarchs of the table has been obnoxious and vulgar throughout the entire meal.

Me: “Do any of you need anything else?”

Customer: “Yeah, I need a to-go box for my boner.”

I bring him over a two-ounce to-go ramekin.

Me: “I’m sorry, that’s the smallest we have.”

He glared at me and stormed out. Thankfully, he wasn’t the one paying… or tipping!