Me: “Can I get two [Burgers] with cheese, one with no pickles.”
Cashier: “So, that’s two [Burgers] with cheese and one [Burger] with no pickles.”
Me: “No, two [Burgers] total, both with cheese, one of them with no pickles.”
Cashier: “That’s the same thing, just said a different way.”
(I’m in the drive-thru with my partner.)
Partner: “What’s on your bacon cheeseburger?”
Worker: “Bacon, mustard,” *then, a word I swear sounds like ‘beehives’* “ketchup, cheese, and pickles.”
Partner: *to me* “Beehives…? What is that supposed to mean?”
Me: “I have no idea.”
Partner: “O… kay. Can I have that without mustard, or… beehives?”
Worker: “Sure!” *he gets distracted for a moment* “Wait, what was that, no mustard?”
(Neither of us can bring ourselves to say “beehives” again.)
Me: “Yeah, no mustard.”
(We got the receipt, and it only said “no mustard” which meant there should have been “beehives” on the burger. When we got the burger, I opened it up to find bacon, cheese, pickles, and ketchup. I still don’t know what “beehives” meant.)
Did you find this story using our World Bee Day roundup?
(I am a lighting intern at this theater, and only there a few days a week. The show has a very large, very realistic tree as a main set piece, and it is fixed to the stage floor. On my first day, this conversation happens:)
Me: “Wow, that tree is really big.”
Coworker: “Yeah… It looks like some of the branches get in the way of the fire curtain, though. Well, the scenic team will work it out if it’s a problem!”
(Two days later, I am back again.)
Me: “Wait… why does the tree look so sparse? Did they make it smaller?”
Coworker: *sighs* “They wanted to add more branches, so they sent someone in a cherry picker to weld some more on.”
Me: “Aren’t the leaves made of paper?”
Coworker: “Yep! So the ‘wood’ and the leaves caught on fire, and set off the fire alarm. The fire inspector came by, because there’d been an issue, and saw the branches that were over the fire curtain line, and made us trim them back — in addition to the branches that burned off.”
(We have just had to put our cat to sleep after being diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer and having seizures as a result of being unable to breathe well. Months later, we have decided to adopt another cat who we see on an adoption site, and we take her to get a full exam and work-up to make sure she’s healthy. We’ve been going to this vet practice for years because the whole staff is amazing. Today we’re seeing the owner’s daughter, who is a recent graduate and addition to the practice. I’m waiting with my cat in the exam room when I suddenly hear her loud voice from the back room.)
Doctor: “Who’s in there? Oh, my God! You know they just had their cat put to sleep like THREE MONTHS AGO? Can you believe she already GOT A NEW ONE? It’s like, oh, wow, I loved that cat so much; can’t wait to replace it!”
Assistant: “Well, she and her husband have been coming here for years. They take such good care of their pets. That’s one lucky cat they’ve adopted. They fought heart failure for a year and a half with the cat before that last one with us. I wish everyone did as much for their pets as they do.”
Doctor: *in a flippant, mocking tone* “Apparently they mean SO MUCH to them they can’t wait to pick out a new one!”
(A minute later she comes in all smiles and friendliness, apparently completely unaware I’ve overheard.)
Doctor: “And how are WE today? And who is this you have?”
Me: “Are you sure you don’t want to do the exam in the hallway?”
Doctor: “I’m sorry?”
Me: “I mean, these walls are so thin, you could communicate everything to me just fine from back there and I’d hear every word. And yeah, you’re right, you ARE sorry.”
(I was fuming, but speaking in a low, hard voice. The doctor went white as a sheet and started stammering before saying she had to “go check on something.” Unsurprisingly, she never came back, and instead a different doctor we’d seen before came in. When I told her what happened, she was immediately horrified and apologetic, and said the owner had already had to reprimand his daughter before about her “bedside manner.” We still go every year to take my cat for checkups and shots, and surprisingly, that doctor is still there, but whenever I see her, she always turns bright red and ducks into the back room. Hopefully she’s learned to be a bit more empathetic in the future… or at least how to keep her opinions to herself.)
(This is my first job. I am in high school and school is almost out. When I was hired, I told that them that there were a few weeks I could not work due to trips that had been scheduled prior to be me being hired. The manager said this was no problem, and even put the list of weeks I was unavailable up on a bulletin board in the office. I worked a few weeks and am able to take off as needed. As my second trip is drawing to a close, I call my job.)
Me: “Hey, I’ll be back in town on Sunday. Do you need me to work this week?”
Manager: “Um, not sure. Call me when you get back and I’ll get you on the schedule!”
Me: “Great!”
(I return from my trip and call again.)
Manager: “The schedule is full. Check in at the end of this week.”
Me: “Okay…”
(At the end of the week I call again. The same thing happens. The manager says he doesn’t need me, and to call back. The third time I call…)
Coworker: “Oh, [Manager] isn’t here right now. Call back in a few hours.”
(I call back in a few hours.)
Coworker: “Oh, he just stepped out. Call back tomorrow.”
(I can never seem to reach the manager after trying pretty much once or twice a week for a few weeks so I give up. About a week later, I see I have a missed call from the restaurant. I call back.)
New Worker: “Oh, I think I called your number by mistake, sorry. Hey, are you that girl that used to work here?”
(I guess I was fired without ever being notified.)
