We Need A Manager With A Spine To Deal With This!

DISCLAIMER: This story contains content of a medical nature. It is not intended as medical advice.

Customer #1: “Excuse me. What’s the best painkiller you can recommend for some back pain?”

Me: “Well, the best thing for back pain would be to see a doctor, but as for muscle or nerve pain, you should take—”

Another customer interrupts after overhearing.

Customer #2: “No, you have spine cancer. Those won’t help you.”

Customer #1: “Excuse you, but I do not have spine cancer.”

Customer #2: “No, you do. My mom is a doctor, so I know these things. Have you tried tea tree essential oil? It—”

I knew I recognized this other customer!

Me: “You again! Get out! We’ve warned you about trying to convince customers to try to buy your oils. It was bad enough when it was in the parking lot, but now you’re stalking the medicine aisle! That’s it! I’m recommending that my manager ban you!”

Customer #2: “You’re just a pawn of big pharma! They want everyone to think they have to spend money on their chemicals and drugs!”

Customer #1: “You’re the one telling me that the back pain I got from a bad weightlifting gym session is spine cancer and can be cured using a scented oil! Go away and let me get my Tylenol!”

I sent [Customer #2] on her way, and my manager agreed with my recommendation to ban her.